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Klaipeda
Nov 17, 2010, 12:52 PM
Hi everyone all the suggestions are very welcome!

My date was very smelly man-feet,bad teeth gave terrible breath ( and he didn't stop talking.To be impressive he was talking and talking). The armpits smelled. It got to the point I felt sick.He constantly wanted to kiss. We used to go to the coffees to eat and his smell of the feet mixed with the food aroma was just awful to me.
At the beginning of our relationship I gently told him that I do not like body odors- the message quite clear for the person to understand that he needs more hygiene. However he did nothing. He was smelling really badly. He used to come to my workplace with the shirt that was dirty, with blood spots from shaving or else. I work in medical Center and for me to show him to my colleagues would have been the shame.. He is educated man and had good job but I just could not put up with the smell. I kept on pressing and talking him gently that , can you please apply some deodorant to the feet and perspirations stick. And can you register to the dentist? If I would not tell him that I don't think he would ever considered doing something at all.
Eventually I think he just had enough and he left me. He simply doesn't call me anymore..
Should I think that I could have done something better,-not to offend him or else. Maybe I was too harsh. But I think that simple hygiene and checking your stance of cleanliness is good for anybody.
( Besides that he never listened me to the end he always interrupted me if I was saying or telling anything looking bored if I was speaking.)
So can anybody please tell me is it ME or is it HIM?
He used to bring me flowers, was nice, kind agreeable. But interrupting and smelly. I saw myself living with him, but he just stop calling and I could sense that he doesn't like me anymore. There is as saying- one cannot change the person ,-either thake him for the way he is or lea\ve him. But how could I take him being sooo smelly?
Thank you so much!

Homegirl 50
Nov 17, 2010, 01:19 PM
Nothing could have done except to tell him he smells.
No one should have to deal with a smelly person and if he wants to go around smelling, let him.
I would not worry about it.

ShawnDS
Nov 17, 2010, 01:50 PM
It's not you, it's him. All we can do is express how we feel to the person and it's up to them to change, if they don't then you did the best you could. Most people look back on situations and see if they could have handled things differently to grow as a person. Like I said you did the best you could. If it were me I would have been really sarcastic and rude. Carry garlic with me so I would smell to or only talk to him in the shower. Haha, I have no tact. Hope that helps.

Klaipeda
Nov 17, 2010, 02:33 PM
It's not you, it's him. All we can do is express how we feel to the person and it's up to them to change, if they don't then you did the best you could. Most people look back on situations and see if they could have handled things differently to grow as a person. Like I said you did the best you could. If it were me I would have been really sarcastic and rude. Carry garlic with me so I would smell to or only talk to him in the shower. haha, I have no tact. Hope that helps.

Carry garlic with me. I like that:D

Klaipeda
Nov 17, 2010, 02:34 PM
Thanks very much for your responses,they were very helpful!

Enigma1999
Nov 17, 2010, 03:07 PM
Hi everyone all the suggestions are very welcome!

My date was very smelly man-feet,bad teeth gave terrible breath ( and he didn't stop talking.To be impressive he was talking and talking). The armpits smelled. It got to the point I felt sick.He constantly wanted to kiss. We used to go to the coffees to eat and his smell of the feet mixed with the food aroma was just awful to me.
At the beginning of our relationship I gently told him that I do not like body odors- the message quite clear for the person to understand that he needs more hygiene. However he did nothing. He was smelling really badly. He used to come to my workplace with the shirt that was dirty, with blood spots from shaving or else. I work in medical Center and for me to show him to my colleagues would have been the shame..He is educated man and had good job but I just could not put up with the smell. I kept on pressing and talking him gently that , can you please apply some deodorant to the feet and perspirations stick. And can you register to the dentist? If I would not tell him that I don't think he would ever considered doing something at all.
Eventually I think he just had enough and he left me. He simply doesn't call me anymore..
Should I think that I could have done something better,-not to offend him or else. Maybe I was too harsh. But I think that simple hygiene and checking your stance of cleanliness is good for anybody.
( Besides that he never listened me to the end he always interrupted me if I was saying or telling anything looking bored if I was speaking.)
So can anybody please tell me is it ME or is it HIM?
He used to bring me flowers, was nice, kind agreeable. But interrupting and smelly. I saw myself living with him, but he just stop calling and I could sence that he doesn't like me anymore. There is as saying- one cannot change the person ,-either thake him for the way he is or lea\ve him. But how could i take him being sooo smelly??
Thank you so much!



I don't think you did anything wrong. You were very diplomatic about it.

I am a hygiene freak. Especially when it comes to teeth. The way they look as well as breath. So, in your case, that would have been a deal breaker for me. I mean, how can you be intimate with him with all of these smells? Gods only knows what his bottom half smells like... With all do respect.

I don't think that you should have to put up with that. Yeah, he may be a swell guy and all, but when bad stenches take over, then that's when I would throw in the towel. Or you could always rub a little vicks under your nose before a date with him... That was a joke.:D

I wish
Nov 17, 2010, 04:15 PM
You already told him the truth yet he seemed to have ignored it. What makes you think that by telling me him over and over to clean up that he would listen?

I think that you gave him enough chances but it didn't work out. No reason to continue to force the issue because that's just the way he is.

Plenty of fish in the sea.

mmresd
Nov 18, 2010, 09:08 AM
Don't put up with horrible hygiene, it is not only the smell that is bad, but it shows no dedication towards a very simple thing. He probably stopped talking to you because he wasn't able to give himself enough courage to shower, it wasn't you at all! Find a guy that is AT LEAST willing to take a shower, this guy didn't even deserve your company.

Good Luck,

Javi