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View Full Version : I'm 21 years old and I'm terrified of driving.


mrnmrsp
Oct 21, 2010, 12:38 PM
I've had 2 learners permitts, due to letting one expire, but I still can't bring myself to actually get out and drive. I believe it may even be starting to affect my marriage. And it really is important that I somehow get my license since my husband is in the military and I will need a way to get around on my own? Can anyone help, or tell me what's wrong with me? Why am I so afraid?

answerme_tender
Oct 21, 2010, 01:29 PM
Have you tried getting some prefessional help with this fear?

Devorameira
Oct 21, 2010, 01:29 PM
We all have some irrational fears. As far as driving phobias go, there is even a website devoted to it. Check out: Overcome The Fear of Driving: T (http://www.fearofdriving.net/)

The website offers some good advice, but if it doesn't help, you may need to see a counselor to get to the bottom of your problems.

Jake2008
Oct 21, 2010, 01:34 PM
Driving is a new skill for you, and one that will take practise, of a repetative nature, in order to alleviate your fears, and build the confidence you need to drive without fear.

When you are driving, for now, have someone with you. Make up a chart, or mark on the calendar, three 15 minute driving sessions. 7 1/2 min out, and 7 1/2 minutes back. Check it off when you get back home. The following week, increase the outings by one, and the time by five minutes. The next week, five outings, another five minutes out, and back. Continue with a schedule, until you feel that you can manage the vehicle well, and that you know your skills are apt, and you are beginning to see positive results, and feel more confident.

It is like any other skill you are trying to learn, and it doesn't have to be all or nothing. Take control yourself, with what you feel comfortable with, in increments that do not overwhelm you. Another tip might be, have someone with you, that you don't feel is judging you, or your ability, or who is overly critical.

This may be one of those things you are feeling pressure about, with knowing you cannot rely on your husband to drive you where you need to go.

Take it slow, one step at a time, start with small, manageable steps, and gradually add to both the time and distance you are driving. Set realistic goals.

I can tell you that most fears of this nature can be overcome, and the rewards are- freedom!! You don't have to rely on anybody, and you can come and go as you please. It is not unlike learning how to swim, which I taught to adults who had never learned. It was a tremendous fear to overcome, but just like I told you, I told them. Small steps, repeated, and gradually added to, until the fear is gone, and the enjoyment of the activity takes the place of the fear.

slapshot_oi
Oct 21, 2010, 01:39 PM
You're not going to like my answer, but you need to actually drive to get over this fear.

It sounds like you really haven't driven that much if at all, so you're mind has got the best of you.

mrnmrsp
Oct 21, 2010, 02:19 PM
No I have not sought help for this yet.. I wanted to know if it was just a psychological thing first or if it was just my head getting the best of me, but from the answers I have received, it seems it may be a mixture of both

mrnmrsp
Oct 21, 2010, 02:26 PM
No I have not driven that much.. but its like every time my husband asks if I want to go driving I feel like I'm going to have a panic attack! And I just say no I know I need to get out there amd just do it.. its just an uncomfortable situation for me.

answerme_tender
Oct 21, 2010, 02:34 PM
I would really try some of the advice already given. What are you going to do when you have children and your husband is not avail to drive, especially in an emergency situation.

mrnmrsp
Oct 21, 2010, 02:39 PM
I already have a son, but he lives with his father 3 hrs away and I only see him once a month for a week

Wondergirl
Oct 21, 2010, 02:56 PM
A driver may be subjected to what's called "sensory overload," which means anxiety produced by all sorts of sensations coming at once -- the car behind is trying to pass and seems to be too close to his rear end, the cars coming toward him seem to be going much too fast and are changing lanes around each other, the light ahead is green but will it stay green long enough for him to get through, he just drove over a rough patch and did it hurt his tires, is he on the right road... and so on. My son, for instance, is autistic and cannot drive -- too much stimuli and overloading of his senses. He cannot handle so many at once and be able to quickly sort through them.

Like someone said, start small -- drive with a patient instructor on quiet streets with little traffic. First, plot out where you are and where you want to go. Think of the "obstacles" you might meet. When I was learning to drive at 27, I mentally drove myself somewhere before I actually got into the car.

Learn basic moves like left turns, right turns, how to deal with four-way and two-way stops, how to make a three-point turn, how to park on a hill, how to park diagonally as well as parallel (practice at an empty office park in the evening at docks and in the lot), how to back up, etc. then gradually begin driving in busier areas. Depending on where you live, practice on rain-slicked streets, icy ones, etc. Practice is everything, and your confidence will increase bit by bit.

flusher1
Nov 10, 2011, 06:48 AM
Here are tons of tips and tricks to beat your fear of driving: fear of driving (http://www.driving-fear.com). Just read the articles. It will definitely help you.