My girlfriend and I have been dating almost two years. Within the first six months she moved in with her pregnant ex who didn't have any family or friends that could help her while she was pregnant. I was mad but accepted the fact that she was just trying to help out someone in need. My girlfriend told me it would be temporary. Now we live together and her ex and her son--who is now my gf's godson-- live separately but things are not temporary. My girlfriend acts like the baby is her baby and it hurts me because we were planning on having our own family but I feel like she did it without me while we were still a couple. Now she talks to her ex daily and babysits the child as often as possible. I told her I don't know why she feels so attached to a baby that isn't hers or mine... and she says that its because she saw him from birth and is in her late twenties and always loved kids, but has nothing to do with feeling in love with her ex. Is it irrational for me to feel angry and hurt and jealous. Its been over a year now and the situation has not changed especially my feelings. It feels like they have an unbreakable bond that shouldn't have really developed while we she and I were dating. Is this grounds for breaking up? We tried me beinginvolved in babysitting but I feel sad when she babies her ex's kid like a mother Would. We also tried not seeingthe kid or mom to make me happy but that upset my girlfriend. One of us is unhappy in both situations but I love her. Our relationship is practically perfect and serene in all other aspects.

So your girlfriend is very close to another woman and helps her care for her baby. Either accept her the way she is or get out. I'm sure there is room in her life for others besides you. Unless she is "cheating "on you, then try to be more supportive of her.

You sound jealous because another's kid gets a lot of attention. Get over that, or it will destroy your relationship. I have had many past girlfriends, and even my wife go crazy over newborns, and have attachments to them for years after. Females are just like that. I don't see it as a bad thing at all that she is helping her friend with her child.

I think this is more than just about a 'friend' having a baby and needing help. It is the girlfriend's 'ex-girlfriend' (lesbian relationships) who needed help and that the op's girlfriend is bonding with.

r, are you concerned not just about the bond she has with the child, but about her re-establishing a bond with the mother? Do you trust her?

There is a lot of love where children are concerned and each one is a new experience. Even when they are born in the same family to the same parents, it is new.

Have you considered couple's counseling to work through this? To help both of you deal with the emotions? Have you talked about creating your own family lately?

I think counseling might help you decide where the relationship stands right now and where it is going.

I'm not sure if the OP is male or female, but it doesn't really matter because it the same issue either way. It's still a matter of trust.

Well as far as the attachment to a baby that is not hers, your jealousy is really immature and silly.
My daughter has a god-son who she was present at his birth and she sees him every weekend and sometimes during the week. Every milestone in his life is a big deal to her.
Is your problem with the baby or the ex-girl friend. This is the question you need to ask yourself.

If your this jealous of her showing affection to friends baby, what are you going to do when she shows even more to her own child. Her time will be taken up a lot more.
Its time to be honest with yourself that it isn't the baby that bothers you, it's the on going closeness she is having with her ex-girlfriend. You should have explained to her that you didn't want the ex to move in with you both. Perhaps you need to sit down and explain to her that no matter how you try, you just can't come to terms with her ex living in same house. I don't imagine anyone would like to have an ex living with them. Let her know that you don't have a problem with her having a relationship with her godchild, in fact explain that you care for the child, but its time for the ex to move into her own place. If she doesn't agree and you can't come to terms then its obvious that you need to move on with your life and find someone to build that relationship that your wanting. Good luck