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nouny15
Aug 24, 2010, 12:17 PM
A week ago I have started to go out with that new guy,we went out 3 dates in one week. He is really nice I like the way he acts when we are together, he holds my hand and we have lots of fun together but the problem is that he rarely sends me messages he only sends me when he want to go ut and the message would only be :"when am i going to cu u(K)" I am scared to trust him can some one tell me why he won't send me messages like good night or good morning?

Jonah.
Aug 25, 2010, 08:50 AM
There might be different reasons.You just started dating him a week ago.Maybe he feels that he could be moving things a bit fast if he does so.So,perhaps, he just wants more familiarity between the both of you.And again,it might be just be one of those tactics that guys use.He may not want to do that to make you think he's falling all over you because some women begin to feel a lot of pride all of a sudden once they discover this and play really hard to get.Trust me, I'm a guy and I know all that.So about trust, since you said he is really nice and you love the way he acts, then maybe you've got nothing to worry about.But still, be really sure he's acting genuinely nice towards you and that he really likes you, you know what I mean.. But about the messages, I can still try to profer a solution.What you can do is um, let's say, try not to go out on any date with him, just for a short period.You could say you're going to be busy the whole week.If he doesn't go out with you for some time,and he's really interested in you,he could now start calling you more just to hear your voice and sending messages.Try to make this a habit out of him. Before you know it,even as you start going out with him steadily,you're going to be getting all the messages you want from him.Well,that's what I know and can

Cat1864
Aug 25, 2010, 09:15 AM
There are many reasons he could be limiting his texting. Things like his parents won't allow him to after a certain time; he is involved with someone else, too; he has a limited amount of texting available; he has to pay for each text he sends; he is using someone else's phone; etc.

It has only been three dates in one week. You shouldn't be trusting each other, yet. You should be getting to know if you can trust each other. Trust is something that develops over time as you learn each other's backgrounds, beliefs, ideals, dreams, and how the other person interacts with friends, family and strangers.

Slow down. Good nights and good mornings can wait bit longer or you can ask him. If you can't talk to him about a text message, then you really do need to slow down and work on communication skills.

QLP
Aug 25, 2010, 09:19 AM
You have been seeing him a week and had 3 dates already. He sounds pretty keen to me. Relax and enjoy, you are going to look needy if 3 contacts in a week, the first week, isn't enough.

Lots of people only send texts when they actually have something to say rather than good night or whatever. Get on with the rest of your life when you aren't seeing him instead of waiting around for constant texts. Heck if a guy a texted me every day in the first week I would run a mile - too excessive.

talaniman
Aug 25, 2010, 10:00 AM
Maybe you have not progressed to that point yet, and have a ways to go before you can get those lovely niceties.

nouny15
Aug 25, 2010, 11:00 AM
Thanks for your answers... the thing is that Monday we went out it was the third date…he told me he likes me and he was extremely nice. And while he was driving me home he asked me when am I going to see you I told him why don’t you call me and we will set a date. He then excused me of playing hard to get which I am not. And now it has been 2 days he didn’t try to call or send me a message so I don’t know if he is waiting for me to call him and that’ s what I don’t like.

talaniman
Aug 25, 2010, 11:14 AM
Don't be rushed into anything right now, but do be cautious and pay attention. You may think he is interested in getting to know you, but guys will do anything to get to know your body. Even be nice to you.

So if this fool isn't willing to chase you a bit, he is up to no good.

nouny15
Aug 28, 2010, 12:51 AM
OK yesterday he called me we talked for 10 minutes he was asking why I didn't try to call him and I don't ask aout him I told him u're suppose to call and stuff like that... he told me he misses me... but I really feel that he is lying about something

Cat1864
Aug 28, 2010, 05:03 AM
ok yesterday he called me we talked for 10 mins he was asking why i didn't try to call him and i dont ask aout him i told him u're suppose to call and stuff like that...he told me he misses me...but i really feel that he is lying about something

Nouny, please use punctuation. It really does make it easier to understand what you are saying. Ellipses (... ) are fine but they do not replace periods and commas.

You are allowed to call him. He shouldn't be the only one showing an interest in keeping in touch. The red flag before was him accusing you of 'playing hard to get' because you wanted to wait (for whatever reason) to set up the next date. He should understand that you may not be able to give him a day or time without making certain there are no conflicts.

Why do you feel like he is lying to you? You should talk with him about your concerns and see how he reacts. Don't accuse him of lying. You don't want to put him on the defensive (though he may get defensive anyway). However, if you truly don't trust him, then perhaps you shouldn't be dating him. It is very hard to develop trust for someone when you are questioning their truthfulness.

Do you mind if I ask how old both of you are and how much dating experience you have had before this person?

nouny15
Aug 28, 2010, 06:23 AM
We’re both 20 years old. Before him I have dated 4 guys and I had a long relationship with someone.
I can’t trust him because of the way he acts. He’s already telling me that he likes me and that he misses me and I find it hard to believe. We only went out on 3 dates.
Today I will send him a message just to say hi and I will wait for him to see his next move.