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View Full Version : What is wrong with my husband- he never seems satisfied and I do everything for him


cnowland
Aug 11, 2010, 06:43 PM
My Husband gets in these moods and says we need a trial separation so he can appreciate what I do for him. What does this mean?

JudyKayTee
Aug 11, 2010, 07:09 PM
It means he wants to live apart and this is the best excuse he can come up with.

He's your husband - ask him what he means. Presumably he knows.

Kitkat22
Aug 11, 2010, 07:11 PM
He probably has a piece of fluff on the side and he's afraid you'll find out the real reason.

Ask him. It's better to know than find out from someone else.

gracie2010
Aug 12, 2010, 07:29 AM
It means he doesn't respect you for who you are and definitely does not appreciate what you do for him.If you continue living like this and DO everything for him he will respect you even less. Talk to him about how time apart would make him appreciate what you do for him ? If you do stay together and there are children involved they will learn his demanding behaviours and possibly continue the cycle, so for your sake and your children s don't be a doormat. There 's also a flipside if you do decide to separate. You'll realize how much time you have for yourself when it's not taken up waiting on somebody else. Yourself esteem will be affected if you continue doing everything for him, because as much as you might say " i enjoy taking care of him " I just would like some appreciation, believe me you'll get tired of it eventually.

Cat1864
Aug 12, 2010, 08:53 AM
How long have you been married and has it been like this for your entire marriage? Is he 'never satisfied' at any time or only when he is in 'one of these moods'? Are there children involved?

Does he have any medical conditions or on any medications that could cause depression, changes in behavior, moodiness, etc.

When these bouts occur are there any other factors such as stress, frustration, concern, worry, pressure from work or other family, etc. Does he 'self-medicate'?

Would he be willing to see a doctor to rule out physical causes or go to a marriage counselor to work through other issues?

If he isn't willing to work with you, there isn't much you can do other than getting counseling for yourself, acting to protect your assets, and trying to keep the damage to a minimum. If he is being verbally or emotionally abusive, separation would be best thing for both of you. The marriage can still be worked on IF that is what you both want, but you don't have to put up with his bad behavior. It could help you see the marriage more clearly and decide if you really want to attempt to fix it.