Well me and my ex split about 4 months ago, in a few days. We have 2 kids together also. Well we split cause I thought she was cheating, and all that come out to be wrong, and also said a lot of nasty stuff to her. Well when we split she started dating a guy, changed her Facebook, and myspace status to in a relationship. We were together 8 yrs have 2 kids, I told her I love her more then anything in this world, and would do anything to get her back. And come to find out she wasn't cheating. Well she has told me before she has thought about us, and think about getting back together. But then I do something stupid like go over to her house, ring the door bell wanting to talk, and it just makes her mad. Just one minute she tell me thinking about us then the next, she's not and even if we did the family would disown her because they all hate me when I tell them how I feel. Just the other day I seen her new boyfriend called her a trick on aim, and all and then seen here status change to single, and she picked me up yesterday wanting to talk, but I think I pushed too much, and made her mad.

Don't push, you screwed up. Without trust you cannot have a relationship. Give it time for things to settle, you keep picking at scabs it's never going to heal. If she wants to get back with you, she needs time to realize that you are sorry and that she can trust that you are going to believe in her.

You are smothering her... its good to lay out your feelings on the table and let her know what you want but then at that point that's all you can do... no sense in pushing because its not going to change things and you are only going to push her away.. you have explained what you wanted now let it be... stop chasing... give her time and space...

K update also forgot to put in first post.The other day she called me and wanted to go to the canal,we went took pics of us holding each other kissing,just feels right sometimes but after I do it I see I'm pushing.

Be mindful not to push however don't put your life on hold either because of this... if she starts to feel that you are never going anywhere it really gives her no motivation to make a decision any time soon

I have alrdy went on a few dates well more like ten with a few diff females.She finds out and calls non stop then right when I think were good she backs out.

Sounds like a game... like she doesn't want to see you go but she doesn't want to be tied down with you.. she just wants you to be available and ready when SHE wants.. so when she calls nonstop then what happens from there?

I don't pick up that night ill wait till the next day when she calls

And then what? What do you say from that point? She's not taking you back but she doesn't want you to see anyone either.. so does she ask you about these dates and if so what do you tell her?

I tell her I go on them she ask what I was doing ill tell.

Who is making sure your children are physically and emotionally safe while you are living this drama? Don't you see her when you pick up your children for visitation? What happens then?

You totally have to stop that... its none of her business... it really isn't.. you guys are NOT together... she doesn't want you to see other people then she needs to make it exclusive again... you are giving her waaaaayyyyy too much power here... she knows every detail of your personal life and has she told you any piece of what she's been doing? Did she tell you she was dating this guy? Obviously not if you found out about it through her myspace or Facebook or whatever... how about you stop giving her the details... leave her to wonder... shes got you wrapped around her finger in a bad way and she knows it all too well..

Well when we split she started dating a guy, changed her Facebook, and myspace status to in a relationship.

Leave her completely alone, and start taking care of your kids. Forget getting back together buddy, as it's the ones caught in the middle of you, and your exes silly drama that counts. Until you both stop the immature silly exploitation of each others feelings this will distract you from the facts, and the really important things to consider in your lives. Like the kids. You don't have to be a couple to be good parents.

Listen carefully, you have issues that you need to deal with on your own, by yourself, for yourself. Unless you do, your impulsive feelings, and angry mouth will always alienate, and push away anyone close to you, and I bet, this is only one example of many in your life, that your mouth and temper have gotten you in bad situations.

Tell me I'm wrong, And I will apologize, but I also think she wanted away from you for a long time, and after 4 months, loves her freedom. Did she cheat? Don't know, but she did, for whatever reason, get away from you and will not comeback as you are, or have been.

You better look at yourself, and get your priorities in order, my friend, because getting her back is NOT your main problem. How you cope with YOURSELF and your personal issues is!