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greg2476
Jul 9, 2010, 07:59 PM
Hi guys, my name is greg, I'm 15 and I got a few problems:
1- its been about 2 months since my birthday and I haven't got a gift from my parents even though they can afford one easily
2- my one good friend doesn't ever want to hang out with me because he is always at his neighbors house
3- I play 3 sports, I'm pretty good at them, I get a 4.0 and it made me popular yet without any good friends because all the people in my classes are different in each one, and once we get done with the sports, me and the guys never talk
4- my dad is an to me every second he is around me, and acts like I'm such a hassle to drive around to my friends house when I do get to, so now I don't even ask


... all this led me to try weed, I loved it, I tried to grow it and I got busted by my parents, now they don't let me do anything... I live on a hill, not by any of my friends, what the hell am I going to do?

Kitkat22
Jul 9, 2010, 08:24 PM
A 4.0 is something to be proud of.
I think you will probably do very well in life if you get it together and get off the weed. It doesn't solve anything and I don't know why you even started it.

Look people can be feel alone in a roomful of people. Everybody feels left out sometimes.. it has no age limit. Your friends will change and you'll have different friends in your school years.

Pick yourself up and start using that very good brain you were given. Your parents love you. Parents just get frustrated sometimes and it's because we get
Upset and forget to tell our kids how important they are to us.

Get with the program and make your life and your intelligence count. Stand out and be a winner.

Jake2008
Jul 9, 2010, 09:09 PM
It seems pretty strange that if you are an excellent student, cause no trouble, play sports, and are liked by different people in your school, that your parents would 'forget' your birthday.

And because of this, basically how you see your parents, you decided to grow and use weed.

What is the real story here. Are you really the angel you profess to be? If I am to believe you are so undervalued and unappreciated by your parents, they must surely be very strange indeed.

Is there a part 'B' to this?

asking
Jul 9, 2010, 09:15 PM
Did they not give you a present because of the weed?

I agree that something's missing. But I also want to say that you are right to be concerned that you are so isolated. I had no mother and a depressed father when I was your age, so I know what it's like to feel a bit like an orphan even when you aren't technically.

Seek out situations where you'll be around other adults who will take an interest in you and give you the moral support you need and deserve. Do any of your coaches take an interest? An aunt you can ask to take you to lunch? Reach out to people. And of course, keep trying to make friends. It is hard, but the weed isn't a good answer. It's a short term solution that will make you dependent on it long term and also alter your brain development. Social skills are harder but a more useful long term answer.

And keep writing here.

asking
Jul 9, 2010, 09:18 PM
Addendum. I just want to say greg's story isn't at all impossible. I had a 3.8 average coming out of high school and my father gave me no high school graduation present and told me I couldn't go to college, even though I'd already been accepted to a good state school he could afford. I have two friends whose parents put their brothers through college, but not them. Parents do strange things.

greg2476
Jul 9, 2010, 10:38 PM
This happened all in about 8 months, those were the 4 main things, there was so many little things that were just as bad though, and I'm still not sure why I didn't get a birthday present, they just forgot about it I guess, and my dad gets so involved wit

Kitkat22
Jul 9, 2010, 10:54 PM
Just sit down with your parents and ask them. Pour your heart out about your feelings. I think you're well on your way to being a fine young man. STOP THE WEED! It kills brain cells. Don't do that to yourself. OK?

positiveparent
Jul 10, 2010, 04:54 PM
Hi to the OP I agree with a previous poster who said you can be alone in a room full of people,or on a site like this one can feel isolated or on the outside, especially if like myself you're from a different country with different customs or laws etc, so you are definitely not alone.

From what I have gathered you're a very good student or your grades are, and that's always a good thing.

It shows you as being studious and responsible.

Which kind of counteracts your getting involved with drugs, don't let them take over your life, it's a mugs game, I have seen the damage it can and does do to anyone who gets involved in them, it'll leave you poor and friendless.

Im sorry your parents forgot to give you a Birthday Present, and I can understand why you would feel hurt about that, perhaps they feel you have everything or something like this, maybe they're saving to get you some big gift for say Xmas, or some event coming up. Have you asked them about this, they won't know its causing you to feel hurt if you don't mention it.

There could be a very good explanation so try asking them.

I can understand you feel hurt and lonely, however by getting involved in drugs you're only going to make things worse for yourself, you'll be giving your parents justification for not treating you as a young adult, and such. You'll be playing into their hands, so why not rise above that and show them just what a decent and clever Son they've really got, by stopping the drugs, and behaving in a more suitable manner towards them.

All or many teens young adults rebel, but in the end they only end up hurting themselves more, and if the authorities had been the people who discovered you had started using drugs you could have ended up with a criminal record and that in turn could have had detrimental effects upon your whole future.

Im sure you know right from wrong, in same token I accept you feel hurt but keeping it inside or releasing it in negative ways such as using drugs won't achieve anything. Talk to your parents, quietly and calmly, and take it from there, Please don't waste your life over a forgotten or over looked Birthday Present, Find out why...

Don't give into to the negative by getting into the drug scene, there's always another way...

Happy Belated Birthday to You.

Also whilst right now you feel your Dad is getting at you he's not he just wants the best for you, all parents want this for their children, you can't see it now, but wait till you're a Dad you'll be similar...

Kitkat22
Jul 10, 2010, 05:02 PM
Stand up and be proud you have such a good life. Stay away from the potheads... JUST SAY NO!

Thank your parents for caring and loving you. You have a good futur ahead of you. Don't Blow It!

greg2476
Jul 11, 2010, 12:46 AM
I forgot to add a few things, I also got hurt during football and the injury kept re-happening, so my coaches got on my butt, thinking I was faking it and it happened about 6 times, twice in football and 4 in wrestling. And I have been having the wo

positiveparent
Jul 11, 2010, 08:09 AM
Hi Greg, I was only able to read part of your comment as the comment areas only allow for so many characters, if you look in the thread you should see a button that says reply, or answer this question then a space, that's the best place to put anything you want to tell us or to explain what you feel is holding you back or preventing you dealing with the problems you feel you have, I think the reply space is at the bottom after all other replies.

When you use the comment area you're limited in how much you can type into that space.

I did mange to gather you have a sports injury which is causing you problems.

You say you're isolated and lonely however I do feel I need to ask, then how did you manage to get hold of the weed or whatever drug it is you've been using? I take it you had to buy that from someone?

If you could go out to get that, then surely you can go out and see friends, of your own age friends from school, friends who don't use drugs.

You now have to make an effort to help yourself, firstly you need to talk to your Parents, if Dad won't listen to you try Mom, she may be able to soften him up, You might possibly feel right now that he hates you, he doesn't he's just disappointed, he's scared you're going to go down the road of self destruction, and end up a no one, and No Dad on earth wants that and neither does any Mum. We love our children maybe we don't always show it in the best way, but its always there.

There's something you could try that will not only help you but could also give your Dad an insight into the fact you're becoming a Man, you could go over to him and say, Dad could we have a talk please, Man to Man, or man to boy, there are some things I want to discuss with you.

It might work give it a try, you've nothing to lose. Once your Dad sees that you're beginning to act more grown up and sensible his attitude towards you will change, also if you are planning to ask your parents why you didn't get a B/Day present don't scream this at them ask them calmly.

Try the suggestions here, you could find they work for you. If you act like a sensible calm person then your parents will respond in the same way...

If you do get to talk to them be calm talk slowly and precisely Im sure you know how to do this, take your time don't shout and yell that won't get you anywhere, but if you say what's on your mind, and then you listen don't interrupt what they have to say to you, you'll probably find this can be resolved, but if you yell and shout and call them names you won't get anywhere, so be calm and be sensible Im sure you can do this. So its up to you...

p.s. also a good idea would be for you to apologise for your behaviour, and ask them for advice.

Kitkat22
Jul 11, 2010, 11:21 AM
Come back and let us know how things are. OK...

cdeering05
Jul 14, 2010, 09:02 AM
My dad was very difficult to talk to, so I wrote him a letter once, and was shocked that he wrote back! Seems he was uncomfortable talking face to face, but was very open in his letter.You may not like some of what he says, but take a deep breath and always remember,"if i can't say something nice, shut up". I have 5 letters from him that I have kept( I am 45 yrs old now) and if you can write as you should speak, saying nothing you can't take back, talk to him as you would want him to talk to you(or write to you) and ask that he write back. Let him know you love him and need him. A birthday present is minor, as kids we forget parents have issues we know nothing of and their mistakes towards us should not be taken personally. They are human, and once felt as out of place as you are feeling right now.Apologize for the drug phase and mean it. Your better than that and know it. Tell your dad that. He was once a mini you.Good luck. And p.s. save that weed money for a good used bike and you can ride to your friends. Builds great muscle tone and gives you freedom and less dependence on dad for transportation until you can drive... (hope your saving for a car) Also, just a note, my kids give me presents on their birthdays. I gave them life. On mothers day I treat them to dinner out because they make me proud.