Once I had an affair. But recently I broke it in fear of Allah. But my ex boyfriend is getting crazy. What should I do now?

What does "getting crazy" mean, please?

Is someone married?

Getting crazy means going mad, lossing control over one's own

getting crazy means going mad, lossing control over one's own

I wasn't looking for the definition of the term, I was looking for an example of his behavior. And who is in a relationship? Thus the "affair".

I think we need some more background information to be able to give you proper advice.

'Affair' has many meanings such as: cheating on one's boyfriend/girlfriend (infidelity); a very passionate sexual relationship; a very passionate and deeply loving but non-sexual relationship; and so forth.

You say you ended it 'in fear of Allah' so I am guessing that in your mind (or understanding) there were reasons your relationship was forbidden. It would help if you could explain them and your ex-boyfriend's reaction to them. It would also help to have examples of how he is 'getting crazy' and if anyone other than you has noticed his behavior changing.

Do you have anyone you can talk to about him and your fears? Are you keeping this to yourself because of other fears or concerns? What have you tried to do?

We will give you all the help we can once we know where to start.

I wasn't looking for the definition of the term, I was looking for an example of his behavior. And who is in a relationship? Thus the "affair".

Sorry Joseph, I couldn't get you last time. Well, he has attempted suicide several times. He stopped going home and meeting his parents. He doesn't take care about his eating, sleeping. He is suffering from insomnia. His friends informed me that he has become a living dead. He doesn't talk to anyone about any of his problems. Cries a lot. He has become a completely hopeless, aimless person as he always thought that he is nothing without me. I tried to pursue him that "everyone has separate life. your life can not be dependent or conditional upon my life. Allah doesn't like relationship without marriage. so we should not continue our relation" but he never accepts my reason. He says he can only try to marry me when I'll continue relation with him. But I don't support his view. If I show the ideological difference between us he gets angry and starts to destroy his life. He thinks he is an obstacle to me and unless he destroys himself I will be in pain. So it has become a complicated situation now. The only thing he will do is either keeping relation with me or destroying his life. What should I do now?

I think we need some more background information to be able to give you proper advice.

'Affair' has many meanings such as: cheating on one's boyfriend/girlfriend (infidelity); a very passionate sexual relationship; a very passionate and deeply loving but non-sexual relationship; and so forth.

You say you ended it 'in fear of Allah' so I am guessing that in your mind (or understanding) there were reasons your relationship was forbidden. It would help if you could explain them and your ex-boyfriend's reaction to them. It would also help to have examples of how he is 'getting crazy' and if anyone other than you has noticed his behavior changing.

Do you have anyone you can talk to about him and your fears? Are you keeping this to yourself because of other fears or concerns? What have you tried to do?

We will give you all the help we can once we know where to start.

Well, our story is a complicated one. He was in love with me at first sight. It took 3 years for him to propose me. I refused him. But he continued to pursue me. During this time I tried to pursue him that Allah never permits this type of relationship. But he never agreed to my point. At a time I stopped to keep contact with him. Then he entered in relationship with another girl. I was shocked to know it. That time I felt I also loved him. When he came to know my feelings he tried to end up his relation with that another girl. But during that period I again realized that I have fear of Allah in my mind. I cannot enter into any premarital relationship. My parents will also not accept our relation. This time my realization was very much strong. When I told him my later position he became frustrated. He did not agree to my point. He said he will be destroyed if I refuse our relation. But I am affirmed to my standing and he is just doing what he told... taking suicidal attempt, stop working (he is an employee in a textile mill), suffering from insomnia, being careless about himself, taking drugs, drinking a lot,not keeping contact with friends or family... this is our story. Now suggest me what can I do or is there anything I can do?

He should consider himself lucky

ridita, I think you need to end all contact with him. There is nothing you can do to help him. Showing concern or communicating with him leads him to think you will do what he wants if he continues to act 'crazy'. Allow those close to him to take care of him and get him help when he is willing to accept it. He has to want to help himself before others can give him help.

You need to take care of yourself. Be true to your own Beliefs. You and anyone you are involved with should share the same Ideals and Beliefs from the beginning. Changing your views or getting more observant of your Beliefs after starting a relationship can appear to be an attempt to use Religion as a way to pressure someone into marrying you.

Good luck in the future.

Emotional blackmail to get what he wants is without honor, and is sick. He is sick, and needs help. But not from you. Pray for him, but stay away from him at all costs.

He doesn't seem to care if he drags you into his sickness, and that's proof that his love is not healthy for YOU, or HIM!!

Leave him in the hands of your God, he will know what's best.