So, my boyfriend of a year and a half recently left on a 3 week trip across the country with his family. We live in Indiana, and they drove all the way to California to spend time in various national parks. I was invited, but because I'm serving a summer internship, I couldn't go.
Anyway, the trip caused somewhat of a rift in our relationship (which is a big deal, because we are usually very in-sync and plan on being together forever). His parents basically forced him into a much longer vacation than he had originally thought it would be and left him no way out of it. I understand that they want to see their son, but it still frustrates me that they treat him like a child.
The point is, I have suffered from an anxiety disorder my whole life. It started when my mother worked the graveyard shift at a hospital and I was constantly a wreck while she was driving, always needing to call her work to check in on her. Once I headed off to college, my fears about my parents' safety mostly subsided. Now, I seem to have transferred all of this onto my boyfriend.
He is very understanding, since he went through the same thing when he was a little boy--his parents had the foresight to get him psychological help before it got to my level. He is always willing to call me after a long drive to reassure me and he never gets mad when I call him frantically.
The problem is, he's in an area of the country that has very poor cell phone signal and I don't have the choice of calling him to see if he is still okay. There is no one in his family who I can reach--none of them have phones--and the Internet rarely works at his campsites. My family and friends all assure me that he will come back okay, but I have so much trouble believing them. I've tried the age-old "keep yourself busy" idea, but nothing works to keep my mind off things. I just want to know that he will be okay, but I can't for sure until 2 and 1/2 weeks from now. I just don't think I can wait that long, but I have no one who is willing to talk to me about this. I know it may sound weak and immature, but I've been battling this my entire life, and logic/reason can only calm me down momentarily.
What should I do with myself? How do I convince myself that my dear, dear boyfriend is going to be okay?

Please seek counseling.

Your boyfriend is spending time with his family, possibly for the last time as their "little boy", visiting some of the most beautiful real estate that this country has to offer. I'm actually jealous. You should be too. Be happy for him, and see him when he returns.

He will most likely be just fine. I said "most likely" because I don't know what's going to happen. Things happen to people. BUT, most of the times they DON'T.

Andy Griffin(from the show) said one time:" 99.9% of the things that people worry about, never happen". That's basically true. My mother still worries about things too much. She needed counseling in grade school.

Please get help with this "worry bug". Or it's going to kill you when you have children. Trust me, mine are 8 and 5, and they have me and my wife on our last worry nerve. Go carts, kitchen knives(helping) snakes in the yard, anything can hurt them. But, "A ship in harbor is safe, but that's not what ships were built for".

What's worse? The poison Ivy or Yellowjackets, or they phobia you create when you keep them paranoid? Boys will be boys. Yours too.


And he shouldn't feel roped into going on an extended vacation. This is a chance of a lifetime for him. The U.S. has some amazing national parks.

Are you a religious person? If so, pray that God keeps him safe, and go do something.

Good luck to you. I'm sure that is because you are kind, loving, person.

I agree counseling is needed.

Also if you feel that you and your boyfriend are forever. Then you both have lots of time together.

This time with his family is important. Let him enjoy himself and be happy that he is spending time with his family.

Honestly though I know this might not help you in anyway.

Just answer this one question. Even if something did happen, Would you be there to help? Could you control what does or does not happen? The answer is no.

You need to get your anxiety order in check, and speak with someone, seek counseling. This anxiety thing can snow ball into a lot bigger things and it will not be good for anybody. Yourself, Your boyfriend or anybody you know.

It is up to you to take steps to get it under control.

Get some help, as your boyfriend did. Something's we cannot do ourselves.

My husband goes to the wilds of Colorado and Utah and Arizona twice a year and rarely has trouble reaching me via cell phone. Thus, I do not understand how you and your boyfriend can't communicate periodically while he's on this trip.

But then. Maybe he or his family are telling you he can't because he needs time away. This sounds like a wonderful vacation! Give him the space to enjoy himself. He won't have the chance to travel with his family much longer. (I treasure memories of our family's last vacation all together with four kids and two adults when we drove (before interstates) to see my mother's side of the family in Idaho. There were no fast-food stands but lots of diners to eat at. I can still rattle off some of the Burma-Shave rhymes!) I hope he takes lots of photos and will share them with you later along with the many stories he will have to tell you.

Meanwhile, figure out a counseling opportunity, make and keep appointments, and surprise him when he gets home to find out you are on your way out of your anxiety problems. Your relationship with him (or anyone else you cling to) will be a lot healthier!