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View Full Version : Can I choose if I want to live with mom or dad at the age of 16


BreannaHembree
Jun 16, 2010, 02:57 PM
I am 16 and I use to live with my mom put I moved in with my dad for not long at all. Well some how he got custody of me he said it was so I could start school but he and his lawyer tricked me into but my name on some paper. So know he is saying her has custody of me but my mom never went to court or got any papers on it. But from whhat I know I'm 16 and at the agge of 16 you can choose where you want to live at right? Helppp!

JudyKayTee
Jun 16, 2010, 02:59 PM
Assuming you are in the US, no, you cannot legally choose where you want to live.

You can state a PREFERENCE to the Court but the Court does not have to abide by it.

I don't understand how the Attorney tricked you into signing something (if that is what you are saying) that caused custody to be changed. I can understand your mother and father coming to some sort of agreement outside the Court concerning custody.

If your mother has legal custody by Court Order your father CANNOT stop her from "claiming" you and taking you back to live with her.

I need more info.

Fr_Chuck
Jun 16, 2010, 03:10 PM
You can not sign anything that gives him custody, you can testify in court where you wish to live.

If he has custody of you, then he will have a court ordered issued by the court giving him custody. It does not sound like he ever went back to court to gain custody, in that case, your mom still has legal custody, if she does, she can merely allow or even demand that you return home

BreannaHembree
Jun 16, 2010, 03:12 PM
My dad said he went to court and got Custody but my mom didn't go to court because she was never told to, she had no idea that this my dad getting custody of my was going on. But my mom has always had has legal custody by Court Order. Would my mom have to give rights away or something?

BreannaHembree
Jun 16, 2010, 03:18 PM
My mom has always legal custody by Court Order!

Fr_Chuck
Jun 16, 2010, 03:24 PM
She would have been ( or should have been served) notice of a new court hearing, you would have normally been there and testified.

So just tell dad to prove it, provide a copy of the document with the court seal on it.

My guess he is lying, trying to get out of paying child support

JudyKayTee
Jun 16, 2010, 03:26 PM
And your mother should have a copy of the "new" (replacement) Court Order. I still don't understand what you signed - but you are providing good, solid info and we are getting somewhere here.

FrChuck is also well read, studied the law, knows what he's talking about (just so you know).

BreannaHembree
Jun 16, 2010, 03:33 PM
I don't either I was just told to sign to my name so I did.

BreannaHembree
Jun 16, 2010, 03:39 PM
Right he is trying to get out of paying child support,Oh and also my said she did get a letter but my dad told her that is was nothing I could come back and live with any time that I wanted to, but now that I want to stay with my mom for good he wants to fight it!

ScottGem
Jun 16, 2010, 06:00 PM
How far away are you? Go back to mom if you want. If dad tries to take you back ask him to produce court documents that say he has custody.

Whatever you signed doesn't matter since there is nothing you can sign that gives him custody. Only a judge can do that.

P.S. I removed your post in another thread, you shouldn't put too much personal info on the web.

BreannaHembree
Jun 16, 2010, 11:37 PM
Thanks but I'm not sure what that is! And we told him to just pull us in court so I can just choose who I want to live with, and I do live with my mom!

JudyKayTee
Jun 17, 2010, 05:30 AM
Keep in touch and let us know how you are doing, how this works out - okay?

ScottGem
Jun 17, 2010, 05:31 AM
Thanks but im not sure what that is! And we told him to just pull us in court so i can just choose who i wanna live with, and i do live with my mom!

What is?

So you live with mom now. So you are OK, telling him to take mom to court if he wants to change the custody is the right thing to do. However, you can't choose, the court will make the decision for you. But, at 16, its likely they will go with your preference.

Never sign anything unless you understand what it is you are signing. But, as I said, nothing you could have signed will make a difference.

Good luck and keep us posted.

BreannaHembree
Jun 17, 2010, 02:07 PM
Well I'm with my mom now, my dad is saying he is going to come down here where she lives with the law and make me come home! Can he do that? Even if I don't want to go back with him?

BreannaHembree
Jun 17, 2010, 02:10 PM
Well thanks, and I have but all he will say is he has custody and I have to do what he tells me too. Oh yeah can all this be true him getting custody without my mom being there at court?

ScottGem
Jun 17, 2010, 04:55 PM
Please review what we've told you. It is possible that he obtained an order without your mom being aware of it, but its unlikely.

You live with mom now, is he telling you that you have to move in with him? If he does, then you tell him to show you a court order that says that. If he refuses then you tell him that, as far as you know, mom has primary custody and you are staying with her. Until he can produce a court order that gives him custody, you are where you belong. If he does produce such an order, then mom takes it to court and asks how he could get such an order without her knowledge and ask that it be vacated.

BreannaHembree
Jun 17, 2010, 09:35 PM
Yeah but I lived with my dad for a short time, I just don't want to go back and I hate all this fighting!

ScottGem
Jun 18, 2010, 05:24 AM
I can understand and appreciate that. Your parents are being very wrong and immature to fight like this over you. You now know what the law is and your father has to follow it.