View Full Version : I don"t understand
troublemakerman
Jun 8, 2010, 07:03 PM
I took it off if I was out of line. My wife use to tell me I had a big mouth, besides talking before I think!!
Clough
Jun 8, 2010, 07:07 PM
Probably so, troublemakerman about a number of points you posted.
Do you have suggestions as to how to make things better with answering those types of questions while being sensitive to the myriad of issues that might be involved, please?
Thanks!
DoulaLC
Jun 8, 2010, 07:40 PM
I surmise that with a name like that you like to see if you can get something going... ;)
While perhaps not all, I believe you will find that the majority of those who respond to these young ladies do suggest that they think carefully about their choices, that they do learn more about their bodies and the choices in birth control (not everyone can or chooses to use the pill), and that they do protect themselves. Often the numerous responsibilities of raising a child are pointed out to them, while providing factual information so that they can be better prepared if/when they continue to make the choice to have sex.
It is a line between being judgmental (even if opinion may sometimes fall that way) and thus usually being nonproductive and unhelpful... verses providing information to hopefully help them see alternatives and perhaps make better choices.
JoeCanada76
Jun 8, 2010, 07:43 PM
Well troublemaker, it is all in the approach. Everybody has a different approach in giving advice. Just because your advice might be different does not mean that you need to talk down to others or being rude about it.
So you are saying instead of trying to get them to stop or prevent it our advice should be how to get birth control, how to use protection , etc... No matter how young they are??
See there are rules. For people under a certain age, we are not able to encourage them to have sex.
I know there are opposing sides and I value your opinion personally maybe we do need to educate younger ones no matter what they decide to do instead of just telling them not to do it.
Just approach it better, say your opinion without degrading another persons advice. Which who is to say for sure what the right approach is or not.
The only thing there are rules to follow. We all have different experiences. Things are a lot different in today world then years ago to. It is happening at younger and younger ages. There has to be something done about it, said about it. Etc...
troublemakerman
Jun 9, 2010, 05:41 AM
Gone
DoulaLC
Jun 9, 2010, 01:31 PM
I agree... it is very sad, and as Jesushelper stated, times are different.
More young people have been exposed to families not being constant as they once were (this can be both good and bad depending on the situation). Some young people are looking for what a family might have provided years ago by getting serious much sooner, resulting in unplanned, and even planned, children.
Babies out of wedlock are not that unusual for many families as they were years ago. You often do see the cycle of young mothers being repeated within families. A number of years back, young unwed mothers sometimes went to homes with other young mothers until they had their children. A pregnant teen in the family was very hush hush... often an embarrassment. Receiving government assistance is not a "last step" as years back... in some locations it is almost a rite of passage or seen as an entitlement.
Times have changed, and unfortunately not always for the best. The aim is to provide the education and support necessary so that if/when a baby does come along, the parents... regardless of age, can get the help they need to provide as well as they can for that child.
troublemakerman
Jun 9, 2010, 01:43 PM
DoulaLC... I guess I'm old school! I didn't write to be harmful, I wish girls would be more careful.
ScottGem
Jun 9, 2010, 01:50 PM
I’m from the old school. It’s not that guys and girls didn’t want sex, they were more careful.
Really? I totally disagree. Before the sexual revolution, it wasn't so much that people were careful since they didn't know HOW to be careful. It was more that the accidents were swept under the rug so you didn't hear about them as much.
I don't disagree with what you said about today's youth, but unless you have solutions, your tirade is not appropriate.