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View Full Version : She broke up with me with because she is leaving in 3 months, but still loves me.


jj2604
May 9, 2010, 08:19 AM
My first real girlfriend (I'm also her first bf) of 3 months broke up with me last night because she couldn't handle the fact that the remaining 3 months until she leaves for good will be too painful and that we would be living a lie or putting on a show. And that if we go through with the remaining months it will just hurt more throughout and at the end. I completely agree with the hurt part at the end, but I still think the remaining time that we have can be very special. We're both 22 and currently are on a "break" for about 3 days to give some time to process what and how we really want to do this.

We both just graduated and would be capable of finding jobs in Asia (where she is going) to move on. I 50% wanted to go because of her and 50% because it is a legitimate career move, which is just as important especially at my age. I thought if things didn't work out when we were there, we could break up there. It didn't need to be now, since everything was working so great. At this point, I would say she is a shy and emotional realist (with lots of feelings she doesn't know how to express) while I am an optimist for the slightest hope (I know if I try hard, it will work out as it has in my life for so many times)...

Now, I understand it might hurt more later, but I really think the remaining months before she leaves will still be fun. Or am I just in denial and trying to put off the "hurt" as far as possible?


Her reason for moving there is to start a new chapter in life... I know it is quite an odd reason to drop everything behind, but I 100% respect her decision and really like her for determination traits...

brittanygn
Jun 24, 2010, 11:55 AM
I think she has the right idea. She is trying to do what she feels is the best for the both of you. If you stay together knowing it is going to end soon then all you both are going to do is make yourselves miserable. It will be one big strung out argument over why she can't stay if she loves you.

redhed35
Jun 24, 2010, 12:02 PM
The breakup now gives her time to get over you so she can start her new life with out you.

It hurts,but she has made the right decision for her.

If the conversation has been when she moved and not if you could come with her,chances are she did not see you with her in asia.

Start no contact.

talaniman
Jun 24, 2010, 09:47 PM
We have heard your side, and hers, and her side makes the most sense. Why prolong the feelings until the last minute when you can get the break up over, and heal as soon as possible?

positiveparent
Jun 25, 2010, 07:03 PM
I think she said it all when you say she said she is going into a new chapter in her life.

A new chapter that doesn't include you.

This to me is her way of letting you down lightly, she wants to be free of all the relationship drama and worry before starting at college.

She is wanting to clear her mind to focus on her studies.

The longer she leaves breaking off with you the harder it will be to do this, and you will soon get over this and on with your life.

Its not the end of the world let her do as she wants she is being sensible about it...