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View Full Version : Need help figuring out dad + my anxiety issues?


evelyn1989
May 3, 2010, 05:45 AM
My father actually. He;s just super anal about any kinds of noise, talking/laughing too loudly, dishes accidentally hitting the sink, neighbours banging doors.. and he seems to be super - well I don't know what word to use - annoyed with mess also. My mum and I share a room, and well, we aren't the neatest people on earth, but we sure as hell aren't the messiest!

But he would vacuum the floor and nag at my mum about how many packets are there and its congested whatnot. Wth? Its not even his room?! But he'd insist it's his house and he didn't renovate it for it to go back to the old times. And he gives my mum a lot of **** for it.

And he used to hit my mum but I sent him a long sms and he seems to change his ways. But their relationship, stresses me out. Like when he nags at my mum, and I stay awake in the mornings or like call home after work just to relieve my anxiety - that they aren't fighting. And he's into politics and super vehement about his views too. Rather extreme, and I find it embarrassing to bring my frens over.

What kind of personality does he have? And how do I ease my anxiety?

JudyKayTee
May 3, 2010, 07:21 AM
Has he spoken to a Physician? Have you and your mother?

evelyn1989
May 3, 2010, 07:24 AM
Has he spoken to a Physician? Have you and your mother?


Hmm nope ha. Our family is too far gone to get any help. Getting any external psychiatric help I feel would be digging up too many long-buried, best-forgotten memories and it would rattle up the relative peace I have now... hmm. I feel its btr to just cope and compromise with whatever comes up... hmm

JudyKayTee
May 3, 2010, 07:31 AM
I don't think anyone here can diagnose your father without knowing what the long buried memories are.

It really isn't fair to diagnose him long distance when (apparently) no one is willing or able to get professional help.

DrBill100
May 3, 2010, 05:00 PM
My father actually. He;s just super anal about any kinds of noise, talking/laughing too loudly, dishes accidentally hitting the sink, neighbours banging doors.. and he seems to be super - well i dont know what word to use - annoyed with mess also. my mum and i share a room, and well, we arent the neatest ppl on earth, but we sure as hell arent the messiest!

but he would vacuum the floor and nag at my mum abt how many packets are there and its congested whatnot. wth?! its not even his room?!? but he'd insist it;s his house and he didnt renovate it for it to go back to the old times. and he gives my mum alot of **** for it.

and he used to hit my mum but i sent him a long sms and he seems to change his ways. but their relationship, stresses me out. like when he nags at my mum, and i stay awake in the mornings or like call home after work just to relieve my anxiety - that they arent fighting. and he's into politics and super vehement abt his views too. rather extreme, and i find it embarrassing to bring my frens over.

what kind of personality does he have? and how do i ease my anxiety?

Anxiety in response to agitation and stress provoking situations is completely normal. It's your body's way of keeping you on alert. Worry, even frequent worry, when it is in response to a real or perceived danger serves the same purpose.

You ease your stress by removing yourself from the source of the agitation and stress provoking agent(s)-given your statement that remedial assistance isn't an alternative.

Classifying your father's personality is irrelevant. What type of personality are you going to develop in the midst of this turmoil?

evelyn1989
May 3, 2010, 06:19 PM
Anxiety in response to agitation and stress provoking situations is completely normal. It's your body's way of keeping you on alert. Worry, even frequent worry, when it is in response to a real or perceived danger serves the same purpose.

You ease your stress by removing yourself from the source of the agitation and stress provoking agent(s)-given your statement that remedial assistance isn't an alternative.

Classifying your father's personality is irrelevant. What type of personality are you going to develop in the midst of this turmoil?

Hmm Thank you. But I get more stressed if I remove myself from the situation. And well, in the midst of this turmoil, I've developed a surprisingly tolerant and patient personality (:

JudyKayTee
May 4, 2010, 07:20 AM
Hmm Thank you. But I get more stressed if I remove myself from the situation. And well, in the midst of this turmoil, I've developed a surprisingly tolerant and patient personality (:


I don't see that in your original post.

DrBill told you how to reduce your stress. You don't want to do that.

What advice are you looking for?