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View Full Version : Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)?


hungtoronto
Apr 26, 2010, 08:49 AM
The following is an actual question given on a University of Washington chemistry mid term.



The answer by one student was so 'profound' that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well :

Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)?


Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant.

One student, however, wrote the following:

First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different religions that exist in the world today.

Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added.

This gives two possibilities:

1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose.

2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.

So which is it?

If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year that, 'It will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you,' and take into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then number two must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over. The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore, extinct... leaving only Heaven, thereby proving the existence of a divine being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting 'Oh my God.'

Clough
Apr 27, 2010, 12:19 AM
Oh, Man! That had me in stitches! LOL! :D

I had no idea it was going where it was going at the beginning. As soon as it hit the punch lines, that was it for me! :p

Thanks for the laugh! I needed that! :)

Catsmine
Apr 27, 2010, 02:11 AM
Since he didn't get publishing credit, I hope the student got the bonus points, at least. I'd like to meet Teresa.

NeedKarma
Apr 27, 2010, 02:25 AM
Since he didn't get publishing creditAny of these websites will do:
Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell - Google Search (http://www.google.ca/search?source=ig&hl=en&rlz=&=&q=Boyle%27s+Law+states+that+in+order+for+the+tempe rature+and+pressure+in+Hell&btnG=Google+Search&meta=lr%3D)

shazamataz
Apr 27, 2010, 08:31 AM
That was brilliant!

Clough
Apr 27, 2010, 12:54 PM
Originally posted by Clough

Oh, Man! That had me in stitches! LOL!

I had no idea it was going where it was going at the beginning. As soon as it hit the punch lines, that was it for me!

Thanks for the laugh! I needed that!


Originally posted by justcurious55

Me too! I thought they'd posted in the wrong section at first! Haha

I also thought that it was in the wrong section! Was thinking about reporting it at first!

hungtoronto
Apr 27, 2010, 01:18 PM
I also thought that it was in the wrong section! Was thinking about reporting it at first!

Lol, I am not that old yet.

BlackVY
Apr 28, 2010, 10:03 PM
Haha!

I really liked that... :D