Hello,
My aunt has four children, they are 4,6,8,and 11.
She drinks from when she first wakes up until she goes to bed. Our family has a lot of things that need to be sorted out and dealt with, and since no one will talk about them, this caused my aunt to become depressed and she started taking anti-depressants. She became addicted to those and quit taking them. She then went back on anti-depressants when she tried to kill herself, they helped for awhile and then she quit taking them. She has a lot of medical problems but is always to intoxicated to fully tell us what is wrong for instance, she may have brain cancer, She just old us "something to do with my head, or something like that" she claimed she couldn't remember what the doctor said. My grandma (her mom), went to an appointment with her so we could all understand what is going on with her. We all convinced her to stop drinking, which to out surprise she did! She was very proud, called us every night to say how well she was doing. But now, I think she is drinking again, and so does the rest of the family. Now when you talk to her she has slurred speech, repeats herself constantly, and can't hold a conversation. She is on lots of different medication for all the medical things wrong, and I am guessing she shouldn't be mixing them with alcohol. I don't know what to do, I want to help her! She has 4 young kids that are soon not going to have a mom! She usually listens to me(Her and I have gone through a lot of the same things parents getting divorced, physical, mental, and emotional abuse, etc) She is mad at the world and I think no person should live like this! I want her to understand that she NEEDS to stop drinking to have a chance to be healthy again, I'm hoping someone on here can help me, help her. I can't just say "Stop drinking", some days she denies being an alcoholic, other days she calls to tell how much she want to stop. If you say certain things wrong to her, she feels like she is being blamed and gets VERY mad. If anyone can help me, please do!

I would first off like to say thank you for posting this . I am a recovered alcoholic and drug attic,and I understand some things about what you are going through. It is admirable you want to help her,and you should know you do not have to do it alone. There are way to many questions here than can be answered in one sitting. If you want real help for your family and are ready to go to any length to see this through you are well advised to find a meeting in your vicinity of a local ALANON group. Look in your phone book for the central office of alcoholics anonymous and they will be happy to provide you with info on meeting halls and schedule. I hope for the best.

I doubt she would talk to anyone, other than family, about this. She likes everyone to think that she has no faults, admitting to a stranger that she does... I just don't think she would. I need help on how I can convince her to go to these meetings, and to get herself help..

The first thing that she needs is to be detoxed in a hospital. She could die while trying to stop drinking at home. Then she needs to go to rehab, and then get in a 12 step program like AA:Alcoholics Anonymous : (http://www.aa.org/?Media=PlayFlash)

You should go to Alanon like someone mentioned:Welcome to Al-Anon and Alateen (http://www.al-anon.alateen.org/)

It will save your sanity. Take family members with you.

What about the welfare of the children? They need to be placed with a family member until she gets clean and sober.

Yes, you are right about her not needing to mix drugs and alcohol. She could die from that too.

It is a very admirable thing that you are doing. I want you to know that I myself have been through the prescription drug/alcohol battle, and am successful to date (one year mark).

You have your work cut out for you, but stick with it. She needs to be ready to quit if she is going to be successful. She needs to understand that her children NEED their mother.

God bless you all.

I think the children are safe where they are because she does have a sober husband. He has tried multiple times to get her to quit drinking, she does for a week or two, and then she is back at it. I'm thinking I'd have more success than anyone else because as I mentioned we have been through a lot of the same things, and I can compare. (I am assuming this is the reason she started drinking, because when she drinks, and I'm there, this is all we talk about)

Emily, you have been provided some good advice so far, yet seem to be talking around it.

ALANON is a peer help group where you will meet people with problems similar to your own as well as others that have lived through and overcome the same problems you are now confronting; how to deal with an alcoholic loved one.

You can only benefit from their experiences. You will see that there is a way, that it's not hopeless, you will be able to develop a plan, and you will have support in carrying it out. ALANON, by virtue of shared life experience will teach and assist you in dealing with the drinker.

Please reconsider the advice already provided. I believe you will be grateful after doing so. Best of luck.

I can't seem to find a meeting in my area on the website? Where could I go where I live and ask about it?

I can't seem to find a meeting in my area on the website? Where could I go where I live and ask about it?

I note your locality as Canada. The following website seems to provide information on meeting locations for Canada:

How to find a meeting in the US/Canada/Puerto Rico (http://www.al-anon.alateen.org/meetings/meeting.html)

If this doesn't meet your needs please post and let me know and I will find some resource for you.

Bill

Just thought I would send you guys some great news! My aunty quit drinking on mothers day (Or that is at least the day she admitted herself into hopital). She is doing great and is so healthy! I am sooo proud of her. I told her to go for detox and she did! She hasn't touched alcohol since and actually vomits if she smells it (I think this is a good thing:P) Thanks for all your help!

Great news. There is also another positive element working in your aunts favor. Females often have a later and more rapid onset and shorter recovery period than males. Spontaneous recovery is far more common in the female alcoholic. Hopefully your aunt falls within this profile.

Wishing both of you the best.

She says she has never felt better, she's going to get her license (which she hasn't ever had) she is very exited to start over.