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View Full Version : My wife looks at lesbian porn but says she is getting nothing out of it.Is she a lesb


jfairer
Mar 14, 2010, 06:58 AM
Trying to see what to do about what my wife is really thinking about. She says she gets nothing out of sex. She hid her porn addiction from me until I found out. She doenst like to talk about it because she is a religious person

Fr_Chuck
Mar 14, 2010, 07:07 AM
Does her religious beliefs stop her from having a adventous relationship with you ?

Do you use various types of positions, toys , games and role playing ?

Lasie111
Mar 14, 2010, 07:05 PM
It might not be her sexuality that makes her like it. The times I have been pregnant and my hormones are off the chart I find myself very very aroused by lesbian porn, to the point of actually keeping a small stash. I have friends who found this happen to them as well. Not saying you wife is pregnant!. lol But lesbian porn is (in my opinion) harmless. No male putting/ramming anything anywhere, no-one being degraded (well at least it looks that way in the videos!) maybe your wife has had something horrible happen to her sexually and can only be aroused when a male is taken out of the situation all together? It could even be something as simple as a hormone imbalance, like us lesbian-porn-loving pregnant ladies!. lol
Anything else I can think of is perhaps your wife likes "Taboo" situations. This too can be hard to handle as normal sex can become boring unless the thrill is there. But you have said that she gets nothing out of sex. So maybe not. Either way it must be hard when she doesn't want to talk about it. You have my sympathies. Perhaps you could approach the subject by saying its normal and nothing to be embarrassed about. Then maybe ease her in to the idea that it could actually be something hormonal? It might make her open up more if she believes it to be a medical reason and not a sin.
Best of luck. :)

hheath541
Mar 14, 2010, 07:21 PM
We can't tell you if she's a lesbian, or even bi-curious, or not. Only she can tell you that.

You need to make it clear to her that it's something you need to talk to her about. Don't press the issue to the point where she seems forced, but don't let it go, either.

smoothy
Mar 15, 2010, 05:35 AM
trying to see what to do about what my wife is really thinking about. she says she gets nothing out of sex. she hid her porn addiction from me until i found out. she doenst like to talk about it because she is a religous person

Since when did looking at some porn (or anything else) automatically equal an addiction. Its only an addiction when it consumes an inordinate amount of time in your life.

Are you addicted to sports because you watched a ballgame? Or addicted to cars because you went to look at a one even if you didn't intend to buy it?

Cat1864
Mar 15, 2010, 05:45 AM
How long have you been married? How old were you when you got married? Who decided that she has a 'porn addiction'?

I am bit confused. The title says that she gets nothing out of lesbian-oriented porn, but the post says she gets 'nothing out of sex' implying the physical act. Could you please clarify?

As Hheath said, only she can tell you what her sexual orientation is (if she knows). I will say that heterosexual females can enjoy looking at lesbian-oriented erotica.

From your post, I am unsure of how you feel about erotica in general. Besides her religious beliefs, are there any other reasons she would be hesitant to discuss sexual issues with you? Have you tried showing her that it is safe to discuss her thoughts and fantasies with you or does she have the impression that you would 'judge' her for having these thoughts?

Synnen
Mar 15, 2010, 07:39 AM
I am consistently amazed at the number of people who can't talk about sex, and then wonder why their sex lives are not good.

TALK to her. Religious views have NOTHING to do with YOUR sex life. If she can't talk to you about sex for whatever reason, then you BOTH need to see a counselor that will let you both open up about it.

The ONLY person who knows whether she is a lesbian is your wife.

I suggest talking to her--about that, and about how you can make your sex life together better.