Hello,
I have been reading all day and night about bipolar. I entered into a relationship that a man that really is my knight in shinning armor, except during his mood swings. I can deal with the quietness, and I am learning that he just wants to be alone, but the rejection I feel during this time... is really breaking my heart.
He takes his medication faithfully every night. He is on abilify and lamactial. He takes them only when he is ready to lay his head down and go to sleep because they make him that way. He has never in the time I have known him decided to not take them. He makes sure he does.
He is a wonderful, very social man, is into many things, has held a job for many years without any problems. I know he loves me without any question, I know he desperatly wants this relationship to work between us. But I don't think he knows the pain I feel when he wants to be alone. He will get very short with me, and it seems like wants to cause an argument, hateful. He has thrown things but never at or even close to me. He has slammed his head through the wall one time during one of his epsiodes.
I have learned with him when he gets overloaded with emotions, especially during holidays, big events and such, he is extremely in a bipolar moment. And I want to be with him and celebrate or enjoy the event with him, but he just looks at me like I am his life long enemy. And I am so far from that. I take great care of this man, I am learning how to deal with his mood swings. When we met he told me of this illness he suffers from, I thought no big deal, I can deal with it. I never reaslized the effect was so great on myself. But my love in my heart is so overpowering for this man, I
I need to know what my role should be when he goes through the thinking I am out to be mean and hateful to him, when I am accused of causing a fight, when in fact I am saying over and over vervally at that,, no I am not trying to fight honey, I don't want to argue, he has it in his head... its me against him.
Someone with bipolar please explain this to me,, he is worth too much for me to even consider walking out on... im tough and can deal with anything... but I need to be informed and I also need to be happy.
Any responses is greatly appreciated...
I know I have rambled and rambled... im just at wits end tonight... its been a few days since he took me in his arms and said... honey I really do love you...
And it kills me...
Thanks

I have been diagnosed with bipolar and treated for the past 15 years or so.

I used to be the violent type, but not anymore.Now I am a passive personality.

It took many many years of different therapy and medication changes for me to get to this point.

Don't got me wrong,I still have mood swings,that's the nature of the beast.Just that today I am,
1)Aware of most of the moods through self awareness, being able to see the red flags and make others aware that I am experiencing them,and
2)Finding the right therapist/doctor/medication combination which took many years.

Self awareness,responsibility for your actions and remembering that others aren't going through these changes,that is a problem for the bipolar suffer, the partners feel those feelings like you are expressing,these are your problems.

He sounds more to the 'homicidal' side of this illness, (My label,not a professional diagnosis)Meaning,he will keep it in,then let it blow out in anger, rather he has threatened you or not doesn't mean that if he doesn't make a change(medications,doctors,diet,etc) this can result in a bad situation.

As you have said,he is a functional bi-polar sufferer.He can keep a job,function in society and is accepted outside closed doors,but once at a comfort zone,he has tendencies to have those outbursts.

Your original question, How can you become aware of a mood swing, simply,you can't.

My belief is that his medications should be addressed by his provider,further therapy with you possibly having input to his therapist/psychiatrist,etc,and time... if he is willing to see things as you do, the fears you have while he has outbursts(ie:How many people do you know put their heads through walls, besides hardcore party people with anger issues)

Your safety and serenity deserve more than he is offering you st this time.