Nightmoon1212
Jan 19, 2010, 01:05 AM
One sided Cybercrush makes me want plastic surgery!
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Hey Everybody
Forst time on AMHD, I have been reading lots of post hopefully to find one similar to mines,so thought I should write one myself. I am in almost in my late 30's,consider myself attractive,though I am single. However I have this problem which is this strong emotional attachment to this guy I met online.
He's lives in Monaco,l and I am in the U.S. we met at a forum chat site,similar to this one,he just came out of a relationship,so have I so we heavily leaned towards each other. He wanted me to visit,in which I would have loved to but due to financial problems I couldn't. So we chat/webcamed,talked,basically he called me three times daily.
Things have come to a holt because then he stopped calling.emailing much,then he finally told me that this long distance thing wasn't going to work at all. He did tell me that before but then kept on with the contact.
Fast forward,Now he has a girlfriend that he has been living with,and I just can't seem to move on. Problem is she's from Spain,a spanish student,and he thinks spanish women are beautiful,that sall he talks about. Spanish actresses,models,etc,and he wasn't like this before he met this woman. I am not spanish at all,so how can I compete with this.So I decide to one day take out a loan and get plastic surgery. All he wants me for is friendship,and someone to vent to.except for the occasional flirty text or call. But I really want a lot more,when I even hint this to him he gets angry and shoots me down as if I'm not and neve will be good enough for him.
Did I miss my chance in visiting him,or was it because I wasn't pretty enough for him? Will plastic surgery,nose breast,I am half black and Jewish,will this finally get him to notice? Because one day I do plan to visit Monaco and I want at least a chance since we've never been together. I hate feeling like this its been more than a year now,sorry for long posts,not even my therapists can help this lingering feling of discontent.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Hey Everybody
Forst time on AMHD, I have been reading lots of post hopefully to find one similar to mines,so thought I should write one myself. I am in almost in my late 30's,consider myself attractive,though I am single. However I have this problem which is this strong emotional attachment to this guy I met online.
He's lives in Monaco,l and I am in the U.S. we met at a forum chat site,similar to this one,he just came out of a relationship,so have I so we heavily leaned towards each other. He wanted me to visit,in which I would have loved to but due to financial problems I couldn't. So we chat/webcamed,talked,basically he called me three times daily.
Things have come to a holt because then he stopped calling.emailing much,then he finally told me that this long distance thing wasn't going to work at all. He did tell me that before but then kept on with the contact.
Fast forward,Now he has a girlfriend that he has been living with,and I just can't seem to move on. Problem is she's from Spain,a spanish student,and he thinks spanish women are beautiful,that sall he talks about. Spanish actresses,models,etc,and he wasn't like this before he met this woman. I am not spanish at all,so how can I compete with this.So I decide to one day take out a loan and get plastic surgery. All he wants me for is friendship,and someone to vent to.except for the occasional flirty text or call. But I really want a lot more,when I even hint this to him he gets angry and shoots me down as if I'm not and neve will be good enough for him.
Did I miss my chance in visiting him,or was it because I wasn't pretty enough for him? Will plastic surgery,nose breast,I am half black and Jewish,will this finally get him to notice? Because one day I do plan to visit Monaco and I want at least a chance since we've never been together. I hate feeling like this its been more than a year now,sorry for long posts,not even my therapists can help this lingering feling of discontent.