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holly_89
Dec 11, 2009, 02:34 PM
We've been together for almost 2 years, but the last few months all he ever does is play video games on his computer. We only have few hours to spend together because we are both working but he actually prefers to spend that spare time on the computer than with me. He even gets annoyed and rude when I try to get him off the computer. Why does he treat me this way? Doesn't he love me anymore? What should I do?

Devorameira
Dec 11, 2009, 03:00 PM
Sounds to me that your boyfriend has developed an addiction to computer games. Gaming is getting to be a real problem that is widespread and can get so bad that it requires counseling to break the addiction. The addiction is real - almost like an alcoholic.

Sit him down and try to talk to him about his gaming habits. Ask him straight out to cut back, or stop playing altogether. Maybe you could get him to agree to just play on a certain day or two through the week instead of daily. Maybe his addiction is so strong that nothing (short of counseling) can be done about it. Think about it:

Is this worth it?
Can he change?"

If either of the answers are no, then you may have to give up on him and the relationship. Good luck.

Fr_Chuck
Dec 11, 2009, 05:31 PM
So stop spending any time with him, go do other things, and explain that you can find other interests if he does not want to be with you

CanIBuyAClue
Dec 11, 2009, 07:15 PM
How much time does he spend playing on it daily? I only ask because I've been on the other end of this spectrum. I became a guy that would hang out with my girlfriend ALL the time, but whenever I wanted to play a videogame [I would even offer her to play with me,etc... ] (I'm talking like a couple hours a WEEK) my ex would always get mad and frustrated and go elsewhere. Which basically made me feel like I was somehow neglecting her or being an arse for wanting to do something by myself for a couple hours. Perhaps give him the freedom to do something by himself if you guys are becoming inseparable and don't do anything alone anymore.

Now if he's one of those 6 hours a day World of Warcraft junkies, disregard everything I just posted and dump him! :)

slapshot_oi
Dec 11, 2009, 09:56 PM
we only have few hours to spend together because we are both working but he actually prefers to spend that spare time on the computer than with me.
You should really be asking yourself why those few hours have to be spent together. You've been dating for almost two years, so the "getting the know you" stage is over. Now, time apart is more valuable than ever.

I'm sorry, but to me, your boyfriend is in the right with this. After devoting 10 hours of my day to my boss, when I get home I usually do solitary activities, like cooking my dinner, playing my guitar, reading, or posting on AMHD.

When you have separation, the time you do spend with each other will be worth more.

Enigma1999
Dec 11, 2009, 10:03 PM
Hello Holly,

Let me ask you this... What was the last year and ten months like? Did he devote he time to you? Was he a good boyfriend?

Is this a new game that he got? Please confirm... Thank you.

holly_89
Dec 14, 2009, 04:21 PM
Maybe I over react.. he does that from time to time, like for a week in every two months, but most of his time he spends it with me. It's just that he completely ignores me, his friends and family when that time comes and that upsets me. But I guess that's his way to relax.. a way that I could never relate to or understand. I should just accept it.

I wish
Dec 14, 2009, 08:28 PM
It's healthy for each person in a relationship to develop their own hobbies, but keeping in mind that spending quality time as a couple is important.

How about a compromise? When he's about to play video games, you go do your own thing. Once he's done, he will come find you.

As long as you keep a balance in the relationship.

CanIBuyAClue
Dec 14, 2009, 08:31 PM
maybe i over react..he does that from time to time, like for a week in every two months, but most of his time he spends it with me. it's just that he completely ignores me, his friends and family when that time comes and that upsets me. but i guess that's his way to relax..a way that i could never relate to or understand. i should just accept it.
Good for you. Trust me, I think it will benefit you in the long run. As a guy, I find a girlfriend that doesn't nag him about playing video games (as long as the gaming doesn't become an addiction) to be a major turn on. It's likely that your boyfriend will appreciate this about you. Congratulations, you're now one step ahead of my ex who would constantly guilt trip me and go to the other room and act all upset and neglected any time I turned on my PS3 -- which was very rarely. Kudos to you! :)

shexibeing
Oct 27, 2011, 06:08 PM
So what do you do when, you wake up to your boyfriend playing computer in bed, then taking it into the front room, his friends coming round, he is still playing the computer. Afternoon come he is on another game, dinner time I cook and interrupt another game. 930, STILL PLAYING GAME , FRIENDS LEAVE ONE BY ONE, LAST FRIEND LEAVES, new game. 1.30 am , another game, 230am. I go to bed. 7.30 in the morning, I go to ask when he will be in bed.. no answer. Playing a game. Joins me at 8am. With computer.? What do I do... every day