Hi,

My boyfriend just broke up with me last Friday and it was very sudden and painful and some of the things he said and did really hurt me. He began acting different out of the blue on Monday and suggested a break on Thursday only to break up with me via text on Friday morning. I was devastated.

I have no idea what caused him to change his mind about me. On Sunday we were talking and laughing and he was telling me how much he loved me and on Monday he just stopped caring. He was not my first love, but my second and it killed me that I was dumped again out of the blue by another guy. The first one left me also with no explanation and saying he still loved me and blah blah blah.

I tried to fix how I was in this relationship but this guy just wouldn't leave me alone. He was clingy and always wanted to see me and I just couldn't always say no without offending him so we spent way too much time together. I became dependent on him as I don't have many other friends and am a very anxious person and I find it difficult to meet people. I hated it and now he's gone and I feel so alone.

We've talked a bit and he keeps telling me how sorry he is, and that he doesn't want to abandon me and that he still wants to be friends so I'm leaving the door open for him to make that effort and trying not to initiate anything with him as it is not healthy for me. I don't want to completely stop talking to him and try and forget this never happened because I am going to be seeing him around school for a few years and it would hurt.

Anyway, we haven't hung out yet, but he says we will nect week. And today I saw him walking. I knew I would because our classes were in opposite buildings so we always cross paths at that time and I was filled with so much anxiety and I just panicked. We were on the stairs when we saw each other so we didn't say a word but he gave me simle and a wave. It devastated me. I had hoped to clear the air a bit and be friendly and try and make it less awkward the first time I saw him, but it was on the stairs and we couldn't stop. I freaked out. I'm upset that he looked so happy when I'm so miserable and that we couldn't talk at all.

I'm freaking out again now and I really have no idea what to do. I need advice on what to do if/ when I see him again? Sorry this is so long.

Thanks.

First off, guys say and do dumb things all the time and its not worth it to get yourself hung up over that, however your saying you guys loved each other, and serious relationships suck when they end. I'm curious as to how long this was, but I digress. One thing though that I think was extremely pathetic was that he broke up with u through text. I can't get over that. About what you should do when you see him... Definately say hi, but do not hold a conversation. Also, as far as hanging out with him, you guys are probably not ready for it. Oh, and one last thing. He might have looked happy, but if this was really a serious relationship then trust me he feels like dying inside. Its never easy, but eventually you get over it. Make sure that you guys keep in touch though, I unfortunately did not after my one serious relationship. You guys know each other more than anyone else, remember that.

This is not a healthy adult relationship, and you have to many other things to deal with in your life to be wasting time catering to someone who doesn't want a relationship with you.

Make yourself happy without him, and never again depend on someone else to make you happy.