123skyscraper
Oct 12, 2009, 05:10 PM
Hi everyone,
I am new to this site and hoping someone can help me out with my situation.
I was with this guy on and off for 10 months. First time we broke up bcos I found out he was still in touch with his ex overseas even though I know they could never make it work. It was not innocent talk, more about their wishful thinking future together.
We got back together after a lot of talking. He tried really hard to defend himself, saying he did nothing wrong, that we would be together and he would sort his problems out (culture, family, that he stopped contacting his ex), that everything was going to be okay, we got back together naturally as there was lots of feelings and chemistry between us. Every weekend he invited me over to his family's house and we would do things together, talked marriage, kids, house.
One day he dumped me out of the blue without even giving me a valid reason, he said he needs someone liberal, that I am the only girl he has not cheated on and that counts for something but if he doesn't break up with me he will cheat on me. Mind you this guy ditched me for no reason during a very stressful time in my life where I had a lot of deadlines and emotional challenges that needed to be sorted out to no fault of mine.
A week later he was dating some girl who looks like me and they are still together. He was very manipulative, abusive throughout the relationship, and threatened me not to say anything bad about him or the monster will come out and I won't like it, he made me feel like everything was my fault and my friends saw me dealing with more drama than happiness. I only realized I was in a bad relationship after we broke up the second time.
I never spoke to him again once I made up my mind that he was no good. I stopped all contacts. My problem is he keeps on trying to contact me. We work together at the same company. I picked up the phone once as it was unknown but recognized his voice and hung up. I have not responded to his emails. The only time I did, I told him that "I have no intention of ever pursuring or maintain any kind of relationship with him. i will never forgive you. do not contact me." I do not want him in my life. I hate it when I hear from him because it annoys me a lot. I have fallen out of love with him. He is not the person I thought he was. He said he cannot accept that I am out of his life after all the things we have been through. He tells me that he still loves me, misses me horribly but that we cannot be together and that he doesn't know if he might be regretful of his decision to end it all.
He sees that I am happy with my current boyfriend (who is nothing like him) and it seems like he wants to make sure I am unhappy. He keeps reminding me of all the good things in our relationship and how wonderful I am etc. I have moved on and would like to completely cut him out of my life.
Lately he has been getting more aggressive in trying to get a response from me. He even rung my doorbell last night, I didn't answer. He then emailed me to tell me that he came to see me and hope that I am all right. Who does that after 5 months? I blocked him from all IM including at work, but his email still went through. I already deleted him from all my contacts. We work together so he knows my work email. He has purposely gone out of his way to get my attention, through whatever means, making a fool of himself and myself in front of people. I don't know what he wants from me. I don't want to interfere with his current relationship either. I want nothing to do with him. I have not uttered one word to him since we broke up. I don't want him as a friend. I just want to be left alone. My friends think he is a psycho for doing this. He is really getting to my head and testing my tolerance. I feel like screaming out at him, but I am too classy and have too much respect for that.
My question is: What is his problem and how do I get rid of him?
I am new to this site and hoping someone can help me out with my situation.
I was with this guy on and off for 10 months. First time we broke up bcos I found out he was still in touch with his ex overseas even though I know they could never make it work. It was not innocent talk, more about their wishful thinking future together.
We got back together after a lot of talking. He tried really hard to defend himself, saying he did nothing wrong, that we would be together and he would sort his problems out (culture, family, that he stopped contacting his ex), that everything was going to be okay, we got back together naturally as there was lots of feelings and chemistry between us. Every weekend he invited me over to his family's house and we would do things together, talked marriage, kids, house.
One day he dumped me out of the blue without even giving me a valid reason, he said he needs someone liberal, that I am the only girl he has not cheated on and that counts for something but if he doesn't break up with me he will cheat on me. Mind you this guy ditched me for no reason during a very stressful time in my life where I had a lot of deadlines and emotional challenges that needed to be sorted out to no fault of mine.
A week later he was dating some girl who looks like me and they are still together. He was very manipulative, abusive throughout the relationship, and threatened me not to say anything bad about him or the monster will come out and I won't like it, he made me feel like everything was my fault and my friends saw me dealing with more drama than happiness. I only realized I was in a bad relationship after we broke up the second time.
I never spoke to him again once I made up my mind that he was no good. I stopped all contacts. My problem is he keeps on trying to contact me. We work together at the same company. I picked up the phone once as it was unknown but recognized his voice and hung up. I have not responded to his emails. The only time I did, I told him that "I have no intention of ever pursuring or maintain any kind of relationship with him. i will never forgive you. do not contact me." I do not want him in my life. I hate it when I hear from him because it annoys me a lot. I have fallen out of love with him. He is not the person I thought he was. He said he cannot accept that I am out of his life after all the things we have been through. He tells me that he still loves me, misses me horribly but that we cannot be together and that he doesn't know if he might be regretful of his decision to end it all.
He sees that I am happy with my current boyfriend (who is nothing like him) and it seems like he wants to make sure I am unhappy. He keeps reminding me of all the good things in our relationship and how wonderful I am etc. I have moved on and would like to completely cut him out of my life.
Lately he has been getting more aggressive in trying to get a response from me. He even rung my doorbell last night, I didn't answer. He then emailed me to tell me that he came to see me and hope that I am all right. Who does that after 5 months? I blocked him from all IM including at work, but his email still went through. I already deleted him from all my contacts. We work together so he knows my work email. He has purposely gone out of his way to get my attention, through whatever means, making a fool of himself and myself in front of people. I don't know what he wants from me. I don't want to interfere with his current relationship either. I want nothing to do with him. I have not uttered one word to him since we broke up. I don't want him as a friend. I just want to be left alone. My friends think he is a psycho for doing this. He is really getting to my head and testing my tolerance. I feel like screaming out at him, but I am too classy and have too much respect for that.
My question is: What is his problem and how do I get rid of him?