Hello I've been friendly with this amazing woman and I want to take it to the next step, we're great friends and she has told me how much I mean to her. But just like any woman she can say one thing and do exactly the opposite, also I don't think I could handle her being with anybody else. Also every time we have one of these "friend" conversations she gets even more flirty and has lately been using the L word. HELP!

Instead of worrying about her. You need to worry about yourself. You have some self-esteem and confidence issues. Your insecurities of her being with someone else is going to get the best of you. It's early warning signs of being needy and controlling. I suggest you take some time to focus on yourself.

Her feelings are out of your control and we have no idea how she feels about you. The only way to find out is to tell her how you feel and see how she reacts.

Well she says she wants to be friends forever but acts differently, I mean I can handle her being with someone else but it would definitely affect things between us. We have had conversations about how she feels and she usually initiates these types of talks. But I wonder if she is trying to convince herself more than she is trying to convince me

How old are you both, and how long have you been friends? Is sex involved?

We're both 25, we met a few years back and there is no intimacy. She recently moved from out of state and we've been spending more and more time together lately

Ok so you are not 13, then tell her exactly how you feel

we met a few years back and there is no intimacy.
How, and the circumstances, what brought you back together


She recently moved from out of state and we've been spending more and more time together lately

Give me a time, one month, two, what?

What's the hurry, just enjoy getting to know each other? Do you date exclusively by mutual agreement? That would be a first step. Talking, and agreeing is the start.

Talaniman Rule- Don't get carried away by your own feelings. Get facts first.


I don't think I could handle her being with anybody else.

Then if this has been going on a while, either your in to deep, or have not had a very clear honest conversation.

Do so!

She knows I like her we have talked about it

Ok we met at a club 2 years ago when she was visiting the area, we hit it off really well and spent time together before she left. Two years later she moves here for good and not a day goes by without talking and seeing each other. We have not had sex for the most part we awkwardly hug. She has been here since early August we both recognize the growing tension between us and its getting more difficult to ignore the current circumstance. We are not officially dating, we're just "friends" but she brings up "friends forever" occasionally yet acts differently

Wow, if after 2 years, she knows you feel and she still didn't reciprocate the feelings, chances are she's not interested in you.

You're just holding on to some false hope because she's treated you so nicely. Don't misinterpret her kindness for something more.

Move on and find someone else. She only wants a friendship.

Well I didn't see her for two years and we barely spoke during that time, we've only reconnected recently within the past 2 months. I liked her then but certain feelings only surfaced recently

But she ALREADY KNOWS how you feel. I suggest you back off. Because if you keep talking to her, you're just going to get false hope. Unless you can handle a friendship only. Don't be friends with her in hopes that she will one day change her mind about you.