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steel72
Aug 24, 2009, 12:13 PM
I am 21 and just recently broke up with my girlfriend. She did it over the phone. I would like to get back with her but I don't know if she still has feelings for me. She said that it was bad timing and that she would like to focus on school and her friend cause this is her senior year and that she does not want a long distance relationship. But I offered to move to her state after I graduated from school so that we could be together. I also opened up with her and told her that I could see us getting married. I have fought so hard to gt with this girl and for it to end the way it did hurt. Like I said before she said that she needed to focus on her self but when we would talk about our fututre she told me that she was scared. Now she wants to be friends and the thing that hurts me is the fact that she made the transition so quick. I would like to know from a female perspective don't most women look for a guy that has his head on straight and is willing to make a commitment to them. Not only that what are some steps that I can take to see if there is a possible way of getting bak with her because I do love her

talaniman
Aug 24, 2009, 12:33 PM
She is a kid in high school and not ready for the commitment you want. Leave her alone, and let her have fun growing up, and going to proms, dances, movies, malls and the stuff that high schoolers do.

You need a woman, not a girl.

Spyral1234
Aug 24, 2009, 02:11 PM
You got to let go bud I'm sorry she probably just wants to have fun and all this long term commitent stuff probably scared her off let it be and find someone who's more mature for you after you've recovered from this

MissRissa
Aug 24, 2009, 04:55 PM
Every post above pretty much said it. The best thing for your emotional health is to let her go. There are no "steps" to getting back with her other than moving on. If it's meant to be it will happen if not, then either way you will still be okay.

britEl
Aug 24, 2009, 05:39 PM
How long had you been dating? She is still in high school and you are talking about marriage basically I think that you may have scared her off a bit (it would definitely scare me!) Its her last year and she wants to live it to the fullest, not worry about her long distance relationship. You also have to think about your maturity levels. Your 21 now, ready to make a commitment and settle down, she is 17/18 ready to party on for her last high school year. I suggest not bothering her with trying to get back together it is just going to confuse things and make things worse for the both of you.

monni89
Aug 24, 2009, 09:56 PM
Hey it sounds like the both of you are going down 2 total different paths, your obviously more mature than her, Sometimes its like that maybe if you were 2 slow things down, relationships are not a rush and if you want to be with someone you have 2 respect their feelings about things as well as they have to respect yours... Sometimes girls just want to have fun, enjoy life while they can rather than being serious and when guys start thinking ahead we kind of freeze up, because trust me love is a responsibility. Its like you know what she wants but your avoiding it she probably got scared when she actually thought of marriage and those things, she probably knew marriage and what it brings its easy 2 say and want and lust for but when you really think about it its all a major thought... love is a mission you can't just hear your partner you have to listen, understand, slow it down and compromise wit her tell her you understand if she's afraid, and the friendship part is a major fright... We often want to just be friends when were 2 afraid 2 take the next step in a relationship. But if its her last year n HS relax she wants 2 have fun with her friends her girls, people she may never c again and her life its nothing personal she's just at the point of her life when she is experiencing changes she's growing up and having 2 decide what she wants 2 do and life you been there before! She's already pressured try 2 slow it down besides she's still a bit young she's not scared she's terrified you've already experienced things and love before. She's a beginner tender to her if you really love her compromise... n then u 2 could plan... tell her you understand and if she can't be the bigger person then you'll know what 2 do
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