Does anybody else ever feel like they're "damaged goods" and that they don't really deserve to be in a long-term relationship or in a marriage?:(

I did for a long time, and in fact I was so wounded, and unhealed that I was really not fit for a relationship at all, at least not the kind I wanted.

But everyone is "damaged" to one degree or another. Trick is to rebuild oneself and I can't write enough about how very possible that is. The distance I have seen people come, that I have come frankly can be incredible -- especially when you have a lot of help!

I failed at one marriage (it lasted one year) and two short relationships before I realised how messed up I was. Then I spent a long time alone but seeking help for myself. I didn't marry successfully until I was almost 40 years old.

Don't give up hope. You got half the problem licked already, realising it. Now... Do something about it instead because you do deserve happiness and you are worth it and it is doable.

I grew up an atheist then an agnostic. I'm not sure what your beliefs are, spiritually, or how you were raised. I always felt like I would never succeed and never accomplish anything in life. I entered relationships where the guy didn't even care about me, which reflect how I felt about myself. I was cheated on, did the cheating, lied when it suited me, drank until I threw up, partied at the bars, and none of it made me feel better or numbed the pain of feeling unworthy of the good things in life. I hated life and everyone around me. I was racist, and hated white people like myself the most. I hated Christians and Jewish people. I hated everything that could be hated. I wanted to die. What's the point in living if all you have to look forward to is an 8-5 job you hate and two weeks vacation a year, right? I looked into the best ways of suicide but could not follow through. I had cried out to God at different points in my life but only heard silence, which made me believe even more that God was not real. Then after three days of crying out to God (after I was devastated by news that I had been cheated on, yet again) who I had grown up thinking was just an "idea", my request had been answered. I wanted to have joy, and I wanted the tormenting thoughts of "you'll never been good enough" and "you don't deserve a nice guy" and "you'll always get cheated on" to stop swirling in my mind constantly. All of a sudden the thoughts stopped. I heard nothing in my mind, no torment. I felt happy! I had cried out to God for three terrible days and He answered my prayer. Because of what He did for me, I want to live for Him and tell other people what happened. My whole life changed. I no longer drank or lied. I chose to do good for others and as I chose an honest life and realized that God saved me from torment and depression for a reason, I slowly realized that I had worth in His eyes. I found my fulfillment in God. I didn't follow a religion or recite a prayer. I just plain talked to Him. Now I'm married to a wonderful man who treats me sooo well and we have a whole life of adventure awaiting us! I will get to live in different countries and live out my dreams. All because I cried out to God until I heard from Him, then I turned from the sins that had brought me into the torment, depression, and feeling of worthlessness. I knocked and knocked on His door, and because Jesus because the ultimate sacrifice for all sins, I no longer had to live with shame and no one to turn to. I was free and had worth. That's my story. From atheist hater of God to full blown follower of Jesus.