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gewqmd
Aug 2, 2009, 01:40 AM
I just need some advice about what I should do. I'm a lesbian and I split up with my ex over a year ago, after being together for two years. We still live together as friends, that may sound completely mad I know. We are friends and We have slept together and basically acted like a couple sometimes, then my ex has backed off. The situation now is that my ex wants to find herself She says, explore etc before thinking about getting back with Me. I encouraged her to, now I wish I had'nt

My Ex told me last week that she was Bi, after all this time She tells me. She has also Met a guy when She was on a night out just over a week ago, she stopped at this guys place that night, but she said nothing happened, She wanted to see how I reacted She said. My reaction was'nt good, it hurt Me so much, We argued all week. She went out again with him on Thursday night and stopped there again, it nearly killed me, all I could think is Him being close to her, a bloke! Friday morning when She came back, I was in bits, I ended with a broken hand after punching the wall, after She told Me, after I asked 'did You sleep with him'. She said She did'nt cause She knew it would hurt Me, but She would have, they did kiss and cuddle up watching TV. I felt because of me amongst other feelings.

She's meant to be going to his for a coffee today, She might stay out she told me, and if I react like that again she's going to leave. I know I have to let her go, Its one of the hardest parts for Me, I love her so much and All I need is her back in my arms, so I can make everything better. I keep telling myself if You love someone You let them go, but when it comes to the crunch...

My Ex says she still loves Me but not the way she used to.

amicon
Aug 2, 2009, 01:59 AM
Hi I think the problem here might be that you still shared a living space for so long which must keep hope alive when it might have been better to separate and move
On

talaniman
Aug 2, 2009, 08:09 PM
It must be hard watching someone who you loved, and have been dumped by, moving on with their lives, and making you just a room mate. I think its time to have your own place, so you can get over this relationship.

zippit
Aug 2, 2009, 08:20 PM
I think you should give her time and space
Especially space she's going to go where she feels most comfortable and safe and you losing you cool and hitting walls isn't going to help anything.

dincher
Aug 2, 2009, 08:27 PM
Sounds like you need to make yourself missed. I think that by your "roomate" seeing you, she feels that she still has a choice.

Me being you, I'd start the no contact process. That includes - I hate to say - getting a place of your own. Pick up and leave. See how much this person misses you if at all. If she doesn't, then it was going to be over anyway.

gewqmd
Aug 3, 2009, 02:23 AM
Thank you all for Your advice. Last night we talked and She told me that She stayed out the first night to get back at Me because We had been arguing that day. Also that She see's sleeping with someone a punishment beacause She thinks I deserve better?? And she also still loves Me & that's why she did'nt sleep with him?? It was'nt what she told me at first.

And She wants to be friends, I think she needs to go find herself as she says. This house is mine, time apart will sort this out once and for all.