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View Full Version : I want to H-e-l-p him but I don't know how


Rose-z
Jul 23, 2009, 09:40 PM
My brother and his ex of a couple days have been going out for almost 2 years nnow == and they have broke up because a stupid night - in which my brother had gotten drunk and wilded out at her parents = because they weren't allowing him to speak to her - he ed up he knows this buh the way she is acting is not in character - and we already know she's very impressionable== she says she needs a clean break and won't speak to him - but he's trying everything inorder to make things right righting her notes, calling - I know she still loves him - but she refuses to speak to him --- for no real reaason - this is very strange for them because they are very tight - like husband and wife - and she is was so obsessed with him to the point where she kept hair from his brush in her bag for good luck -- and I can't understand why she's acting this way - I'm not being nosey - I'm try to help my brother because his crying ever night and going nutzz and I hate that I can't help him -- when she's being brainwashed -- as dramatic as that sounds --HELLLLLLLLP

N0help4u
Jul 24, 2009, 05:15 AM
She most likely has a good bond with her parents--like whatever you do to my parents you do to me type thing.
She most likely figures if he can do that to her parents he can do it to her.
She most likely figures he let her see a side of him that he hadn't been up to that point
She isn't being brainwashed her parents are just looking out for her and she most likely does agree considering his behavior.

What he needs to do is leave her alone and send the parents some flowers with a note apologizing for his stupid wrong behavior.
That won't get her back but it will be a step in the right direction.

How old are they?

Maybe time will be on their side and things work out but it is hard to say.

I wish
Jul 24, 2009, 05:24 AM
I'm guessing he already apologized to her parents? That would have been the first step.

There's nothing you can really do for your brother in terms of his relationship with his ex. Maybe she deeply cared about him before, but feelings can change and you can't force her to feel a certain way. It has to happen naturally. I doubt it was just that one incident that broke them up, but it was the trigger.

It's out of his control now. She already knows that he wants to get back with her. So now it's up to her if she wants him back. She will contact him if she wants him back.

As for you, what you can do is hang out with your brother. Get his mind off her as much as possible. Go play sports together. Play video games. Hang out with cousins. Go out with him. Anything so that he doesn't have to think about her.

roxypox
Jul 24, 2009, 07:46 AM
What you can do for your brother is:

1. Tell him that you're there for him.

2. hang out to take his mind of things

3. Be there for him if he needs to talk, or chill etc.

As for the break up, if he has made it clear that he wants her back, there really isn't more to do about this.

Like I wish points out: if she wants him back, or wants to talk... she'll contact him.

talaniman
Jul 24, 2009, 07:53 AM
All you can do is be there for love, and support, and give him a shoulder to cry on, and listen when he vents. Beyond that its up to him.