That was nice sneezy hwo did it turn out? Any good? :P

... she turned out to be married. I'll post up the story later in my blog. It was absurd.

Yeah, he's usually wearing the "Peace, Love, and Crabs" shirt, too...



One day I'll find my Prince Herpes!

Man, I have been doing it all wrong to, it has always been "so, does it bother you if I have crabs?"

Yea, I wondered why I never got any laughs.

I posted the story on my blog... sadness.

This is probably not going to sound funny on a computer but...

A friend of mine when we go out somehow manages to find paper to crumple up or streamers (we still don't know where he pulls it from) and he sneaks up behind people singing "nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, GONOREAH!" and throws the paper at them then runs off :D

Absurdity...

Wow, that married lady was doused in EPIC FAIL.

This is probably not going to sound funny on a computer but....

A friend of mine when we go out somehow manages to find paper to crumple up or streamers (we still don't know where he pulls it from) and he sneaks up behind people singing "nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, GONOREAH!" and throws the paper at them then runs off :D

I don't get it. I guess it would have to be one of those things I would have had to been there for.

Awww I just read your blog Sneezy... DARN!

This is probably not going to sound funny on a computer but....

A friend of mine when we go out somehow manages to find paper to crumple up or streamers (we still don't know where he pulls it from) and he sneaks up behind people singing "nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, GONOREAH!" and throws the paper at them then runs off :D

It's also fun to pretend sneeze on your hand, and then rub it on some random person, look at your buddy and be like, "Dood...this Swine Flu's kicking mai bootay..." and just walk off.

Oh, and have another friend taking pictures.

Chyeah man... how rough is that, huh? And even my friends thought I was "IN"

It's also fun to pretend sneeze on your hand, and then rub it on some random person, look at your buddy and be like, "Dood...this Swine Flu's kicking mai bootay..." and just walk off.

Oh, and have another friend taking pictures.


I had a friend who wrote "ANTHRAX" on my high school yearbook... every.. single.. page...

... yeah.

I don't get it. I guess it would have to be one of those things i would have had to been there for.

Yeah pretty much lol
You have to see it.
He just goes up to random people in bars yells gonoreah at them, throws paper at them then runs away...

He is not right in the head that boy :D

This "friend" wouldn't be Vaughn now would it..

chyeah man...how rough is that, huh? and even my friends thought I was "IN"

Last summer, I was invited to this copy-store opening. So I'm talking to friends, eating a couple of pretzels, and this guy who looked about 25 comes up to me and starts telling me I look like a princess. He then tells me that he's a "single man" and has been looking for his own princess for a long time.

But something just didn't seem right about him.



15 minutes into the conversation, this lady comes up, grabs the guy by the arm, turns to me and says, "I'm so sorry he's been bothering you...he has a form of retardation."



Oh, my self-esteem was SOARING! :D

this "friend" wouldn't be Vaughn now would it...?

Haha nooo, although that is something he would do :p

Last summer, I was invited to this copy-store opening. So I'm talking to friends, eating a couple of pretzels, and this guy who looked about 25 comes up to me and starts telling me I look like a princess. He then tells me that he's a "single man" and has been looking for his own princess for a long time.

But something just didn't seem right about him.



15 minutes into the conversation, this lady comes up, grabs the guy by the arm, turns to me and says, "I'm so sorry he's been bothering you...he has a form of retardation."



Oh, my self-esteem was SOARING! :D

People with "mental problems" are usually extremely honest! It was a huge compliment!

Last summer, I was invited to this copy-store opening. So I'm talking to friends, eating a couple of pretzels, and this guy who looked about 25 comes up to me and starts telling me I look like a princess. He then tells me that he's a "single man" and has been looking for his own princess for a long time.

But something just didn't seem right about him.

15 minutes into the conversation, this lady comes up, grabs the guy by the arm, turns to me and says, "I'm so sorry he's been bothering you...he has a form of retardation."

Oh, my self-esteem was SOARING! :D

Holy cow... I laughed so loud people at sbucks think I'm having issues. Hahahaa... so sorry!

holy cow...I laughed so loud people at sbucks think I'm having issues. hahahaa...so sorry!

I'm seriously a magnet for the most unconventional people ever. Once at a restaurant, I was eating by myself, enjoying some "me" time. The waiter gets to talking to me, and eventually he's like, "I'm really interested in you. Want to go on a date?"

I wasn't interested, so I said, "No thank you, I just got out of a relationship and I'm not quite ready to get involved yet."

HE STARTED CRYING! WHAT THE HECK?


I felt so embarrassed, so I was like, "What's wrong?!"

He sniffled, wiped his face with his arm, and said, "I'm crying because...SOMEONE BROKE YOUR HEART!!"

I wanted to die.

I don't look scary or smell... lol one day I'll find someone somewhat normal. XD

People with "mental problems" are usually extremely honest! It was a huge compliment!

I KNEW I was a princess! ^_^

I'm seriously a magnet for the most unconventional people ever. Once at a restaurant, I was eating by myself, enjoying some "me" time. The waiter gets to talking to me, and eventually he's like, "I'm really interested in you. Want to go on a date?"

I wasn't interested, so I said, "No thank you, I just got out of a relationship and I'm not quite ready to get involved yet."

HE STARTED CRYING! WHAT THE HECK?!


I felt so embarassed, so I was like, "What's wrong?!"

He sniffled, wiped his face with his arm, and said, "I'm crying because...SOMEONE BROKE YOUR HEART!!"

I wanted to die.

I don't look scary or smell...lol one day I'll find someone somewhat normal. xD

All I can say is wow, and I don't mean to laugh at other peoples misfortunes.

I feel you Torrie. Ask alty... I attract the crazies.

... Actually, I attract the deceptive ones. They at first, seem normal, then for some reason, TURN crazy. Like... full blown, get me a straightjacket and an episode on Maury crazy...

Kind of like the muffin girl?

Like right now, this really cute Italian lady sat down next to me, using her computer, and she can't use the AT&T hotspot, so I kindly enter my password in for her so that she can use it. She thanks me, and we talk for a little...

... then her THREE KIDS show up. What?? There's no way this woman was fertilized thrice.

It's okay, Adam. I laugh at it, too. It just gives me another story to make myself more interesting than I already am.

Interesting = Man Magnet. ;)

Sneezy, I can totally sympathize. I'm seriously considering writing a book about all my crazy male experiences.

Kinda like the muffin girl?

JUST like the muffin girl.

https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/relationships/so-whats-worst-thing-ever-happend-you-dating-relationship-249255.html

Post #9

Like right now, this really cute Italian lady sat down next to me, using her computer, and she can't use the AT&T hotspot, so I kindly enter my password in for her so that she can use it. She thanks me, and we talk for a little...

...then her THREE KIDS show up. what?!?? There's no way this woman was fertilized thrice.

Mi dispeace, parlo solo un a di'italiano!

But seriously.

Once I was talking to this guy in a long line outside of a Game Stop, and we're having a good time, sparks are flying, awesomesauce. He was answering some texts every now and then, but I didn't pay attention.

Suddenly, this blonde girl comes STORMING up where I'm standing and is like, "HE TOLD YOU HE'S TAKEN! CAN'T YOU TAKE A HINT?!" I was mortified! I said, "What are you talking about?!"

He was texting his girlfriend, telling her he told me he was taken, but I was continuing to be persistent.

...

JUST like the muffin girl.

https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/relationships/so-whats-worst-thing-ever-happend-you-dating-relationship-249255.html

post #9

Haha, I remember reading it and had to bring it up. It is definitely one of those situations.

Definitely a good read for those who haven't read it.

Wow, did you know you can't use the letter W... T... F in a row? That is crazy.

Sorry, I just caught that and was amused

I just read "Muffin Girl" and I must say, that's hardcore crazy right there.

See, that's what happens when you talk to the quiet, lonely people in the class and take them home with you.

I feel ya Torrie. Ask alty...I attract the crazies.


You calling me crazy? :(

Did I mention how pretty you are shazzie?

Is it 5 yet? Or at least somewhere? I am dying here.

Nope, it's 4:05pm in my part o' the woods.

I feel ya Torrie. Ask alty...I attract the crazies.

...Actually, I attract the deceptive ones. They at first, seem normal, then for some reason, TURN crazy. like...full blown, get me a straightjacket and an episode on Maury crazy...

Sneezy all women are crazy... it is just relative to your experience. I truly think women are rationally insane, so to speak. No offense ladies... :cool:

Sneezy all women are crazy...it is just relative to your experience. I truly think women are rationally insane, so to speak. No offense ladies...:cool:

I am not crazy, I'm eccentric. Wait, don't you have to be rich for that?

Crap!

You suck! ;)

Sneezy all women are crazy...it is just relative to your experience. I truly think women are rationally insane, so to speak. No offense ladies...:cool:

No offense taken! It gives me an excuse to be on meds! :D

I just cut my sons hair. He looks like a little G.I. Joe.

Hee, hee.

I guess I should tell him I'm not a hairdresser.

NA! :)

No offense taken! It gives me an excuse to be on meds! :D

Ditto! :cool:

Did I mention how pretty you are shazzie?

Pretty crazy apparently :p

Haha no I admit, I am a nutjob, a looney, a crazy, a mental, a head case, a freak...

Put it all together and you get... eccentric!

I like that Alty, I'm using that from now on :D

It's all storming heavily outside... guess I'm staying on AMHD the rest of the day!

It's all storming heavily outside...guess I'm staying on AMHD the rest of the day!

Day? What's that, I sleep during the day :p

It's nearly light here, once the sun creeps up then it's bed time ;)

Pretty crazy apparently :p

Haha no I admit, I am a nutjob, a looney, a crazy, a mental, a head case, a freak....

Put it all together and you get... eccentric!

I like that Alty, I'm using that from now on :D

Apparently you don't have to have money;

eccentric; In popular usage, eccentricity refers to unusual or odd behavior on the part of an individual. This behavior would typically be perceived as unusual or unnecessary, without being demonstrably maladaptive. Eccentricity is contrasted with "normal" behavior, the nearly universal means by which individuals in society solve given problems and pursue certain priorities in everyday life. People who consistently display benignly eccentric behavior are labelled as "eccentrics."

That's me! :cool:

Maladaptive, eh?


I took a shot for that once.

Sounds like a drug.

"Gotta go round back and score some maladaptive"

:D

I was very eccentric in College, well eccentric looking anyway... or was that homeless looking? Hmmmm

Sounds like a drug.

"Gotta go round back and score some maladaptive"

:D

I was very eccentric in College, well eccentric looking anyway... or was that homeless looking? hmmmm

The homeless look is in.

Just saying. ;)

The homeless look is in.

Just sayin. ;)

I can't keep up with what's 'in' these days... does that mean I'm getting old? :eek:

I can't keep up with what's 'in' these days... does that mean I'm getting old? :eek:

You're only as old as you feel.

OMG, am I dead? :eek:

You're only as old as you feel.

OMG, am I dead? :eek:

ZOMBIE! :eek:

ZOMBIE! :eek:

I'm much better looking then a zombie.

Aren't I? :confused:

I'm much better looking then a zombie.

Aren't I? :confused:

Haha, much better! ;)

I sense two cute girls talking smack for no good reason.

You both make my blood pressure sky high.

So stop it.

Or keep it up.

I'm not sure.

i sense two cute girls talking smack for no good reason.

you both make my blood pressure sky high.

so stop it.

or keep it up.

im not sure.

Keeping it up.

Actually, isn't that your job?

Ahhhh! Wrong thread. Again!

I'm so bad. :(

MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM... huh, I mean, hey how's it going?

Bleh.

I'm in a poor mood.

And why is that my poor Torrie?

There just comes a day when you find out that the people you thought were your good friends and you could depend on...


... well, they're just complete whores.

D:<

I agree wholeheartedly. This is why I trust no one... except my immediate family. I bring no one close. I am, as one of our beloved amhd-ers would call me, "ruthless."

There just comes a day when you find out that the people you thought were your good friends and you could depend on...


...well, they're just complete whores.

D:<

Take my advice... explode them... you'll feel a lot better... :cool:

I'm so TIRED!!

But I promised my neighbor I would sit up at her house with her kids while she got landry done (at the landromat) so I got to wait for her to get home in about 30 minutes then let her do like 3 loads. At least she has cable though :) I don't, so it will be nice :D

See, I'm the same way. People can hang out with me for years, and still never know me.

I don't like talking about my feelings with friends, except really, really close ones.

I make the mistake of telling a friend I like a guy (that she dated 4 times over 2 years ago), she's excited for me and whatnot...

And then does this 360: tells me he's not right for me, he likes me but she doesn't think it's a good match... so she goes to his work and tells him I don't like him. He stops talking to me, and she GLOATS SO EVERYONE CAN SEE that she spent the entire day with him and "had SO MUCH FUN!"


The first guy I've been interested in since me and my ex broke up, and she had to ruin it for no reason at all besides her being jealous.

I'm just angry.

See, I'm the same way. People can hang out with me for years, and still never know me.

I don't like talking about my feelings with friends, except really, really close ones.

I make the mistake of telling a friend I like a guy (that she dated 4 times over 2 years ago), she's excited for me and whatnot...

And then does this 360: tells me he's not right for me, he likes me but she doesn't think it's a good match...so she goes to his work and tells him I don't like him. He stops talking to me, and she GLOATS SO EVERYONE CAN SEE that she spent the entire day with him and "had SO MUCH FUN!"


The first guy I've been interested in since me and my ex broke up, and she had to ruin it for no reason at all besides her being jealous.

I'm just angry.

Boom boom POW!

Trust me... it works... lol

Nah, basically, it was her jealousy that made her do this... and she did date this guy 4 times over 2 years... so who broke up with whom there? If she did it, then I guess it's a little better for you to like him, but if be broke up with her, that's against the rules. Still, what she did wasn't right. Very immature

This is what I would do...

Eyedrops in her coffee... the next time she goes out on a date.

... 4 drops in a cup of coffee... explosiveness achieved.

this is what I would do...

eyedrops in her coffee...the next time she goes out on a date.

...4 drops in a cup of coffee...explosiveness achieved.

Really? Eyedrops in coffee? Hmmm... Interesting... very interesting...

Yeah. Ingesting a couple drops of eyedrops... will wreck your system for 5 - 6 hours.

... I mean, DON'T DO THAT! THAT'S AWFUL!

... ::snickers::

SHE BROKE UP WITH HIM! EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.

She was like, "Well, Torrie, he just wants to sleep you, I think!" And I was like, "OH YEAH THAT'S WHAT MUST HAVE STOPPED YOU FROM DATING HIM 4 TIMES, RIGHT?!"

And she has a boyfriend. She's had a boyfriend since right after she broke up with the guy. So they've been dating 2 years, and the new boyfriend doesn't like her ex.

GAH. It's just maddening. I mean, she told me she was jealous of me once, but I didn't really take it to heart, or take it really seriously.

WELL I DEFINITELY KEEP TABS NEXT TIME.

Sorry. I'm just so irritated.

I'm going to do what Lloyd does in Dumb & Dumber... put some Xlax in her tea... "You're a regular girl. I want you to stay regular. BUWAHAHAAHA!!"

On a lighter note, I played MLB: The Show for the first time.


Let's just say I PWNED everyone. That's right. Bring it on.

Hehe.. evil people... then again, toilet humor goes a long way these days...

Just don't go overboard with the Xlax...

Or don't go over the ISneezeFunny recommended dosage of eyedrops... ;)

Maybe I'll just tell her boyfriend she has crabs, but is afraid to tell him.


Nah, I wouldn't do that. I'm not THAT mean...



... not yet, anyway.

Maybe I'll just tell her boyfriend she has crabs, but is afraid to tell him.


Nah, I wouldn't do that. I'm not THAT mean...



...not yet, anyway.

Oooo Oooo can I tell him... He will believe it coming from me... lol ;)

And yes... I am that mean... :D

"So, are her cold sores gone?"

Maybe I'll just tell her boyfriend she has crabs, but is afraid to tell him.



LMAO... as case of galloping dandruff would scare him off her I'm sure :eek:

Naughty girl Torrid :cool:

Sneezy (I wasn't looking at the keyboard, and I originally typed Snexxy, lol)

I love how your pickup lines double as relationship crushing one-liners.

You should write a book!





Lol Friend, I'm a good girl!


... sometimes.

My buddies call me a homewrecker. :(

And you can call me snexxy anytime.

... minus the n...

That was a pick up line? Damn!

Sneezy, how do you do it? How do you get all those ladies with such... umm... interesting.. lines...

It's all about the "look"...

Wait for it... wait for it..

BLAM! *tilts eyebrow*

The look. You're welcome.

Don't worry Sexxy [;)], my friends call me Megatron.

Why? Because I apparently don't seem to care much about anyone. Compliment? Maybe.

"The Look" can be extremely hot or extremely awkward, depending on if the person is well practiced. Example: Princess Single Man.

it's all about the "look"...

wait for it...wait for it..

BLAM! *tilts eyebrow*

the look. you're welcome.

Awesomeness... so its all in the look... nice...

I'll have to try that look someday... just for fun... sound like a sure thing... :)

BlackyVY, if you pull off the look, the women will be swooning all over you! It's like a tractor beam...

I get to go get my eyes checked tomorrow... I'm really looking forward to them telling me my vision still sucks, is getting worse, and I have to get thicker lenses.

YES!

Wow... thicker lenses...

Sounds like fun... a friend of mine had massively thick lenses... we used to use it to read the dictionary... :)

Hmmm I don't think my fiancé will be too happy if I use the look in that case... might just save it for a rainy day... there is only one girl I want to attract with my tractor beam.. :)

Oh, well, then just practice "The Look" on her! She won't mind. ;)

Yeah, my lenses could start fires on Mars. They are so thick. They barely fit into the frames. x_x

Thank God for contacts. Really.

Oh, well, then just practice "The Look" on her! She won't mind. ;)

Yeah, my lenses could start fires on Mars. They are so thick. They barely fit into the frames. x_x

Thank God for contacts. Really.

Yeah... I'll try "The Look" on her... wish there was a YouTube video about it, so I could watch that and try it. That video would get soooooo many hits... Lol!

Fire on Mars hey? Sounds good... well my smile can start a fire on the Sun... you can see it, its still going now.. :D

I still have a baby tooth. LOL.

So I have a little gap. BAH BABY TOOTH BAH!

I still have a baby tooth. LOL.

So I have a little gap. BAH BABY TOOTH BAH!

Awww baby tooth... soooooo cute!

Peek-a-boo... I see you... who's a good baby... YOU ARE!. :D

Awww baby tooth... soooooo cute!!

Peek-a-boo... I see you... who's a good baby... YOU ARE!... :D

This made me giggle. I don't know what that says about me. But I did giggle. XD

The baby tooth is never coming out on its own, that's the killer. But most people don't notice it, so it's all good. What will have to happen is I'd have to get it pulled, a fake one put in, and then get braces before I could start fires on the sun.


Well, that's not completely true: my teeth are still very white, thank you!

This made me giggle. I don't know what that says about me. But I did giggle. xD

The baby tooth is never coming out on its own, that's the killer. But most people don't notice it, so it's all good. What will have to happen is I'd have to get it pulled, a fake one put in, and then get braces before I could start fires on the sun.


Well, that's not completely true: my teeth are still very white, thank you!

Haha... you giggled... you giggled when I called you a baby... you will now be called Baby Torri... enjoy... :)

I don't like going to the dentist... I have white teeth, but not because of them. I don't like the drill thing... yuck... its worse because I have bad sinus...

Anyway, I'm sure Baby Torri has nice baby teeth... so cute... :D

Hi all. Sorry I was MIA, I was... um... working. Yeah. That's it.

hi all. sorry I was MIA, I was...um...working. yeah. that's it.

Mate, you can't improve on "The look"... its too strong already... any stronger and it will start attracting guys!! :eek: :eek: :eek:

My milkshake DOES bring 95&#37; of the girls to the yard... and about 32% of the boys.

... I got to change the recipe or something...

Hey, leave my baby tooth alone! It gives me more personality and character... although I'm not quite sure I need anymore of that... xD

Sure Sneezy... "working"... pish posh...


I've never had to beat girls off me. I'm pretty sure I never want to. Awkward.

my milkshake DOES bring 95% of the girls to the yard...and about 32% of the boys.

...I gotta change the recipe or something...

Haha... that's one hell of a milkshake... I don't think the world can handle its raw power... water it down a little... :)

Hey, leave my baby tooth alone! It gives me more personality and character...although I'm not quite sure I need anymore of that...xD

Sure Sneezy..."working"...pish posh...


I've never had to beat girls off of me. I'm pretty sure I never want to. Awkward.

Haha.. I'm not making fun of the baby tooth Baby Torri... its just cute...

I'm sure it does give you more personality... it's a little bit of your youth that refuses to let go... :)

Hey, leave my baby tooth alone!


Not sure about the Baby tooth thing myself... :cool:



22561

Not sure about the Baby tooth thing myself........................:cool:



22561

BAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!

You crack me up M... :D

BAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!

You crack me up M... :D

:D:):cool:

I'm adorable, thank you very much!

Sans the buck teeth. :)

I think you guys are just jealous that you don't have a lingering baby tooth, or a knot in your butt from getting a splinter when you were in pre-school and had to go the ER to get it cut out...

Yep. Jealousy.

I don't believe the knot in the Butt story... pictures would be required :D

I'm adorable, thank you very much!

Sans the buck teeth. :)

I think you guys are just jealous that you don't have a lingering baby tooth, or a knot in your butt from getting a splinter when you were in pre-school and had to go the ER to get it cut out...

Yep. Jealousy.

Damn... its too obvious isn't it?

We thought we could act normal so you wouldn't see how jealous we were... but you saw right through the act... I'm sorry...

I'm just soooo jealous...

I don't believe the knot in the Butt story......................pictures would be required :D

Once again, I agree with the man with the beer truck... :)

I know you're jealous, BlackVY. It's okay, I understand. Just don't end up like my hag-friend, okay?

LOL my butt is MUCH too pale for pictures!

This is the story:

When I was in pre-school, I was playing on the playground, which consisted of wooden equipment. Well, it was my turn to use the slide, so I scooted my precious bottom along the wood to the metal part, when


BAM!

Something sharp stabbed my bootay. I slid down the slide, disgruntled, waddled to my teacher, and said, "Something's in my butt, Teach-Teach." (WASN'T I CUTE? )

So they took a look at it, freaked out, called my mom and the ER, and I was in the hospital. They laid me on my stomach on this table with some coloring books, cut my butt open, and pulled out a splinter the size of a shot glass.

So I have always had a knot upon my precious cheek. It's fading, but it still makes for a good story. :D

LOL my butt is MUCH too pale for pictures!





That's why I came prepared ;)






22562

If I had a tan butt... or tan anything, for the matter, with my auburn hair, I'd look like an oompa loompa!

Well, Kiddies...


The Baby needs her sleep, or she will be very grumpy at the Eye-Poker Doctor tomorrow. >.>

Goodnight, fair citizens of AMHD!

Guten Nacht, meine deutsche Freunde!

Night Torri :)

Night lady.

Hey to anyone out there.

I'm here :)

Sarah

I'm here too but most don't talk to me :P so I'm not sure if that counts ;) hehe. (im kidding don't start yelling at me)

... you do give out weird vibes.

Sarah

Hi all.

I'm here for a good time, not a long time.

I see Torrid peeking. :)

Hi all.

I'm here for a good time, not a long time.

I see Torrid peeking. :)

Hola Alty :)

Hmm it's been a few days.

Cripes. Guess what? I did something naughty ;)

.. you have to guess.

Sarah

Hola Alty :)

Hmm it's been a few days.

Cripes. Guess what? I did something naughty ;)

..you have to guess.

Sarah

But, there are so many possibilities.

Hmm, you peed in your neighbors yard.

You egged someone's house.

You had a one night stand?

You played ding dong ditch?

Am I close? :confused:

I'll stop in for a few minutes before heading off to some much needed sleep...

Got my eyes checked... still -8/400, so at least the sucky vision isn't getting worse.

Filled in a prescription. Yay for meds!

I was asked on a date today from a guy who goes to my college. He had seen my profile on the university's social network, and sent me a message saying he thought I sounded so interesting, blah blah and gave me his number asked me to "PLEASE" text him at least when I got the chance.

So I did, because I don't really know anyone there yet since I just tranferred.

Things were going well, until he informed me that chick flicks are his absolute favorite kind of movies to watch, and then proceeded to argue with me about pretty much the only chick flick I like (Bridget Jones' Diary, he said it was bad).

When he asked me on the date, I was much too turned off by him liking chick flicks & inspirational movies, among other things. I politely said no.

But all's well ends well... since I'm not going on a date with him, he has designated me his "GOOD BUDDY" and wants to hang out ASAP.

They all find me...

But, there are so many possibilities.

Hmm, you peed in your neighbors yard.

You egged someone's house.

You had a one night stand?

You played ding dong ditch?

Am I close? :confused:

Here's a clue:

http://tbn1.google.com/images?q=tbn:R2Xx3bsCLnEiyM:http://www.boxturtlebulletin.com/btb/wp-content/uploads/2008/07/mcdonald.jpg

Sarah

Cripes. Guess what? I did something naughty ;)

..you have to guess.

Sarah

You ate and went swimming without waiting an hour!

You ran with scissors?

You tore the "Do not Remove" tag off a pillow?

I give up. :(

She tried to get the baseball bat to fit but it would not go in?

EDIT: Yay you ate some more meat... Good for you. Joe clapping.

Here's a clue:

http://tbn1.google.com/images?q=tbn:R2Xx3bsCLnEiyM:http://www.boxturtlebulletin.com/btb/wp-content/uploads/2008/07/mcdonald.jpg

Sarah

OMG! You killed a clown! :eek:

Here's a clue:

http://tbn1.google.com/images?q=tbn:R2Xx3bsCLnEiyM:http://www.boxturtlebulletin.com/btb/wp-content/uploads/2008/07/mcdonald.jpg

Sarah

You had an orgy with Ronald McDonald, Grimace, Mayor McCheese and the Fry Guys (to fulfil your midget fantasy)?

They all find me...

At least that means they're leaving me alone. ;)

She tried to get the baseball bat to fit but it would not go in?

EDIT: Yay you ate some more meat... Good for you. Joe clapping.

Wrong thread Joe :rolleyes:

Wrong thread Joe :rolleyes:

And I'm the naughty one. :rolleyes:

She tried to get the baseball bat to fit but it would not go in?

EDIT: Yay you ate some more meat... Good for you. Joe clapping.

No. I ate more than plenty.

I got two big macs, a large fry and a smarties mcflurry.

YOU DON'T understand how good it was. That greasy, juicy, mayo-y deliciousness oozing down my throat.

I wasn't here because I got sick.

Real sick.

Indigestion. Diarrhea. Upset stomach. [PEPTO BISMOL].

-- But gosh darn it... it was WORTH it.

Sarah

No. I ate more than plenty.

I got two big macs, a large fry and a smarties mcflurry.

YOU DON'T understand how good it was. That greasy, juicy, mayo-y deliciousness oozing down my throat.

I wasn't here because I got sick.

Real sick.

Indigestion. Diarrhea. Upset stomach. [PEPTO BISMOL].

-- But gosh darn it ... it was WORTH it.

Sarah

Don't worry Muddy, McDonalds hamburgers aren't real meat, you're still a veggie girl. :)

I'm way too old to deal with crazies! I have enough funny/creepy/odd stories to last me a lifetime..

*yawn*


I didn't sleep well last night. I had a dream I was running a 5K race (because sometimes I actually like to run), and I was happy because I was in such good shape... but when I crossed the finish line, I was angry because this whale, a literal whale, was laughing at me because it beat me.

FOOL!

I love Mickey D's french fries, sweet tea, and "chicken" nuggets. >.>

I'm way too old to deal with crazies! I have enough funny/creepy/odd stories to last me a lifetime..

*yawn*


I didn't sleep well last night. I had a dream I was running a 5K race (because sometimes I actually like to run), and I was happy because I was in such good shape...but when I crossed the finish line, I was angry because this whale, a literal whale, was laughing at me because it beat me.

FOOL!

I only run if I'm being chased. The person chasing has to have a knife. If there's no knife then why bother running?

Guns don't matter, he could be good enough to shoot a moving target, so no need to run.

I've given this a lot of thought. :D

Don't worry Muddy, McDonalds hamburgers aren't real meat, you're still a veggie girl. :)

... secretly after a decade and some years I want to be a meat eater... rawwwrr [tear that sh!t up.] lol

Maybe.

I'd feel so guilty. Poor animals.

Sarah

I love Mickey D's french fries, sweet tea, and "chicken" nuggets. >.>

Om nom nom nom. :D

Damnit, now I'm hungry. :(

You guys suck!

...secretly after a decade and some years I want to be a meat eater........... rawwwrr [tear that sh!t up.] lol

Maybe.

I'd feel so guilty. Poor animals.

Sarah

They're already dead when they're being cooked, might as well eat them. ;)

That didn't sound good. :o

Running is the only thing that keeps my tummy flat. Well, it was before I was told to not exercise for a little bit (I was losing a lot of weight because of medicine! I should find out next week if I can start again).

Anyway, yes. Running's not my favorite, but my tummy seems to love it. It's a traitor. All my fat goes to my tummy. >:/

Well yes, I am getting hungry now too, but sooo tired.

Got to go everyone, lots of traveling tomorrow.

Night... ZZZzzz.

Night Helper!

GOOD NIGHT :)

Torri.

I LOVE TO RUN [from the cops]


Sarah

Running is the only thing that keeps my tummy flat. Well, it was before I was told to not exercise for a little bit (I was losing a lot of weight because of medicine! I should find out next week if I can start again).

Anyway, yes. Running's not my favorite, but my tummy seems to love it. It's a traitor. All my fat goes to my tummy. >:/

Even if my tummy responded to running, I wouldn't run.

Seriously, it's not pretty. I look like I'm having a seizure when I run. People point and laugh.

In fact, if someone with a knife chased me and I ran, he'd never catch me because he'd be on the floor belly laughing.

He's the only one who'll be getting a tummy workout.

Oh, also, I'm a klutz. Really! I hurt myself at least 5 times a day. It's pathetic. Can you imagine what would happen if I ran? Someone may die. It could be me! :eek:

So much innuendo (no don't alty) on that last page , but I'm going to play it cool and not touch it :cool:

Well yes, I am getting hungry now too, but sooo tired.

Got to go everyone, lots of traveling tomorrow.

Night... ZZZzzz.

Traveling Joe?

Where are you going?

Can I come?

I'll bring food. :)

Poo, he's gone.

Night Joe.

The cops never chase me. :(

It's probably because I'm the most boring person ever. I hardly ever speed, I don't drink, I don't smoke, I don't do drugs, I don't have sex, I don't smack blind people, and I don't streak.


I'm never going to get any po-po attention...

Seriously, it's not pretty. I look like I'm having a seizure when I run. People point and laugh.


LMAO!

I haven't found a sports bra that will accommodate. I like my meaty status. I work it Yo.

So much innuendo (no don't alty) on that last page , but I'm gonna play it cool and not touch it :cool:

But, but.

Poo. :(

You brought it up, now I have to sit her and bite my tongue?

I. want. To. Say. Something.

Nope, I'm not going to do it. I'm a good girl. :)

See Alty, when I run, I pretend I'm on a beach. Naked. Oh, and that I tan.


That makes me feel a lot sexier. ;)

LMAO!!

I haven't found a sports bra that will accomodate. I like my meaty status. I work it Yo.

Even if I had a good sports bra it wouldn't help.

Really, it's sad. I look like I'm swatting a hive of bees and trying to jump over alligators when I run.

I do work out, at the gym, in a corner, alone, hiding.

That works for me. ;)

See Alty, when I run, I pretend I'm on a beach. Naked. Oh, and that I tan.


That makes me feel a lot sexier. ;)

On a beach? With sand?

Have you ever ran in sand? It's not easy! I don't need further obstacles. :eek:

Of course I've ran on sand! It sucks almost as bad as running in snow while it's sleeting!

But you know how graceful they look...


*INSPIRATIONAL MUSIC*


Like that.

It's probably because I'm the most boring person ever. I hardly ever speed, I don't drink, I don't smoke, I don't do drugs, I don't have sex, I don't smack blind people, and I don't streak.


It's a fun hobby. Kind of like coin collecting.



ALTY:
UNBITE IT.

Do it.

Do it.


Sarah

I have to sleep. I'm drooling on my poor laptop.

Talk to you guys later...

Night!

Nighty Night

Torri.

Sarah

Any updates on Starby?
I'm in too much pain to look at the different threads where an update might be.
I sure do miss having her to talk to.

Any updates on Starby?
I'm in too much pain to look at the different threads where an update might be.
I sure do miss having her to talk to.

In pain?

Are you okay Art?


Sarah

Hope you're OK Dear Artsy... why pain?

Hope you're ok Dear Artsy... why pain?

Bulging disc in my back.Got hit by a car when I was on my bicycle years ago.Hit and run,nice guy huh?
Every now and again it acts up and the pain is horrible.
Actually, I need to get off this chair ,I am getting numb.
Thank you for your concern my friend, I appreciate it!
Time to get back in bed.
Hope all is well with you and yours.
Will play catch up with you all tomorrow ,if I can manage to sit.:(

Ooo get better Art :(

Hope you have some good pain meds, maybe even some rub on pain reliever [i.e. Tiger Balm], maybe a massage...

Sarah

Aww no one wants to come out and play :(

*pout*

... well it is 1:51 AM


Sarah

Ooo get better Art :(

Hope you have some good pain meds, maybe even some rub on pain reliever [i.e. Tiger Balm], maybe a massage.....

Sarah

Thanks Sarah,meds are all gone,just toughing it out right now.I just need to get my buns back to bed.Haven't see you around much lately,hope all is well with you and your little one :)

Thanks Sarah,meds are all gone,just toughing it out right now.I just need to get my buns back to bed.Haven't see you around much lately,hope all is well with you and your little one :)

Hey lady you get to bed ;)

Thanks for asking all is well, R is growing faster and faster each day [can't believe she's going to be three soon :(]

Healing wishes go to you.

Sarah

mudweiser
Ultra Member


Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: mudville
Posts: 1,666

Herbie
Quick go answer something , look at your post count :eek:

Maybe I like it like that.

Muahaha

Sarah

I wouldn't doubt it ;)

Darn it I answered a sex question without thinking of my triple 6's...

Sarah

Lol... :)

This is disgusting.

http://www.lewrockwell.com/orig2/baskerville1.html


Sarah

This is disgusting.

http://www.lewrockwell.com/orig2/baskerville1.html


Sarah

How is that even allowed to be on the internet?? ::shakes head::


Anyway I'm out of here , night sarah :)

Nighty Night Dneirf.

Sarah

Call it irony but I thought that was Hilarious. Maybe because I was thinking that if our neighbors kid for kidnapped they would probably be happier away from their dad... I know, I am a bad person. But GEEZE he's an ahole.

How was everyone's night? Any fireworks?

No no magic happening in my area.

I can't believe I'm still up it 3:34 AM where I'm at.

Sarah

Eww east coast. Arkansas here. An hour later.

I swear if we had coyotes one would howl while I am typing.

Guess I can settle for a stray cow. Moo

This is disgusting.

http://www.lewrockwell.com/orig2/baskerville1.html


Sarah

WHAT THE F---?

Anyone know how to get a site removed from the internet?

Sick

This is disgusting.

http://www.lewrockwell.com/orig2/baskerville1.html


Sarah


If you read the whole thing, and the blurb at the bottom... his wife abducted their child. I think this is his sarcastic way of getting back at her.

This is disgusting.

http://www.lewrockwell.com/orig2/baskerville1.html


Sarah


If you read the whole thing, and the blurb at the bottom... his wife abducted their child. I think this is his sarcastic way of getting back at her. At least, I'm assuming it was his wife. I think he's pretty bitter about it.

Anyone out there today? I haven't been here in awhile.

Hey. Is there anyone out there?

:: pant, pant, pant::

I'm here! I ran all the way.

Did someone call? ;)

Hey Alty.

You still around?

I haven't been around for quite some time now. The MUN is finally over. I didn't get the 'best delegate' prize though... it was so difficult (16 out of 604, one in each commission, and in mine there were 33 delegates, so mine is 1 out of 33)! I needed more information to defend my points, so I didn't debate properly... :(

Fortunately, my team got the 'best delegation' prize (Which is 40 out of 151)

Ok, sorry guys, I needed to say that. Shazzy, I hope Vaughn gets better.

Hey Adam, Alty! :)

I see there's another 'pet expert' in here! :) Hi Ren!

Hey Unky! Long time, no chat?

How you been?

I was confused about the contest thing you were talking about if indeed you were talking about the contest/competetion thing. It didn't sound good though so sorry if it was bad or not the best. I am sure you ar econfused now just by reading this.

Hi jerry, I've missed you :)

Yup, it's been a long time Adam. I didn't won the 'individual prize' but my team won the group prize (which is easier to win from a certain point of view though).

I've been busy like a bee. I wasn't on AMHD yesterday and I come back today with lots of threads with responses, with those of the lounge with several posts, or pages, like this one.

And you? How are things? :)

Hey Jennie! I've missed you too! :) in fact, the whole AMHD family... I think I'm really addicted ;)

Hey jerry, do any of the ladies on AMHD 'own' you? Can I own you? Everyone has a boy of their own cept me :P

hey jerry, do any of the ladies on AMHD 'own' you? can i own you? everyone has a boy of thier own cept me :P

Jerry is 17. No one owns him. He's our baby. He's a good kid that enjoys just being a kid.

LOL! I thought you 'owned' bear? :p

Hey NM! :) Right on! ;)

*EDIT* sorry for the double post my enternet is screwing up and I didn't know it already posted

Hey NM! :) Right on! ;)

Hey Jerry! ;)

How are you today?

I can't own bear he is already owned. Although I tried ;)

Well I have to say jerry your very mature for your age ;) good for you. Ill keep looking for my 'AMHD boy' hehe.

LOL! I'm tired NM, tired... fortunately I'm in the hols now, and things are expected to go smoothly on now. Tomorrow morning tuition though, at 8.30. Then on Friday, 8.30 again. Phew! Next week will not be so 'heavy'.

Ok, good luch Jennie! :)

Hi Unky, we missed you. The duck statue missed you too, there's this weird green substance growing on it. :(

Hi Alty, I missed you too! :)

Green Substance?? :confused: Time to get the washer X2000, it'll get off in matters of seconds. Here I go!! :p

Sqwooosssshhhh!!

Hi Alty, I missed you too! :)

Green Substance??? :confused: Time to get the washer X2000, it'll get off in matters of seconds. Here I go!!! :p

Sqwooosssshhhh!!!!!!!!!!

The statue! Not me! :(

Does anyone have a towel? :o

Oops... Why were you standing in front of the statue? I thought you'd move sideways when I sprayed on it :confused:

Here's a towel... sorry :o

Shame shame jerry. *shakes a finger* *giggle*

I am not owned on here nor do I own anyone here. I tried a couple of times but they slipped away. Darn the luck

I am not owned on here nor do I own anyone here. I tried a couple of times but they slipped away. Darn the luck

You're not on enough to be owned and I have more then I can handle right now. ;)

Jennie, here you go, your very own boy toy. :)

Oops... Why were you standing in front of the statue?? I thought you'd move sideways when I sprayed on it :confused:

Here's a towel... sorry :o

No, I was off to the side. I am wearing a green shirt, maybe that's why. :(

I have water in my ears.

I need to go change clothes.

Sigh. :rolleyes:

Hey KISS! :)

Ok, Alty, g.t.y.r and in the meanwhile, the statue will be like it was, that is as clean as can be.

Hey KISS! :)

Ok, Alty, g.t.y.r and in the meanwhile, the statue will be like it was, that is as clean as can be.

Huh? I can't hear you. Water in my ear.

Why are you waving at me?

Is there someone behind me? :confused:

You're not on enough to be owned and I have more then I can handle right now. ;)

Jennie, here you go, your very own boy toy. :)

Well, I would be on here a lot more like I was but work picked up quite a bit so I kind of keep slipping away a little at a time. I will be on vacation next week so you won't see me then.

LOL!

There, I'll lead you to your room, get dry clothes while I wash the statue. k?

LOL!

There, I'll lead you to your room, get dry clothes while I wash the statue. k?

You can change in my room if you want Alty. I don't mind. :)

LOL!

There, I'll lead you to your room, get dry clothes while I wash the statue. k?

I can see your lips moving, but I can't hear you.

Hey, where are you taking me?

You can change in my room if you want Alty. I don't mind. :)

You want me to change your room?

I just had it painted a week ago.

Why do you have a camera? :confused:

Oh, don't mind any of that camera stuff Alty, Just come on in.

There are cuetips in the bathroom

Alty, I think you need to learn how to read on lips... that may come in handy, not only in such cases... tee hee! (that sounded like Sneezy... :p)

I am not owned on here nor do I own anyone here. I tried a couple of times but they slipped away. Darn the luck

Will you be mine? ;) I don't require much. I will cook, clean, and make you happy. All I ask is you be nice to me ;)

will you be mine? ;)

Well, I will tell you that won't be the first time I have been asked out today? Haha.

If you can catch me when I am here, I am all yours hun

Nice :D I have my own guy now. :D

Want a sandwich? Brownies? A beer and some chips? I got a TV. Its not huge, but it's a good 38 inches I think. Watch the game and all that

Wow, Well, you just happened to get the nicest guy in the world, so Yea, I will take that beer and some pretzels. I got a 50" so it will work for now. Thank You

OK you stick with your 50 inch and ill make sure you get those pretzels and beer asap. What type of beer? I have fat tire and budlite, but that's it. What do you like?

Wow, Well, you just happened to get the nicest guy in the world, so Yea, I will take that beer and some pretzels. I got a 50" so it will work for now. Thank You

Must. Not. Say. Something. Naughty. Biting. Tongue.

Must. Not. Say. Something. Naughty. Biting. tongue.

You want to see it?

ok you stick with your 50 inch and ill make sure you get those pretzels and beer asap. what type of beer? i have fat tire and budlite, but thats it. what do you like?

Well, my 2 favorite beers. Can I alternate them out?

You wanna see it?

:eek: I'm afraid! :eek:

:eek: I'm afraid! :eek:

Never be afraid but be willing.

Never be afraid but be willing.

50 inches, only an elephant is willing to take that on! :eek:

50 inches, only an elephant is willing to take that on! :eek:

Or a whale, whichever is better. No, I would hate for that though. Every time I would take off my pants the girl would either faint or run screaming. I would be a virgin for life. :(

LOL guys... don't put it up on AMHD or the mods will get the thread closed and deleted :eek:

Ok, I'm off, bedtime. Bye everyone!

Unky out.

Bye Unky! Good talking to you again

Or a whale, whichever is better. No, I would hate for that though. Everytime I would take off my pants the girl would either faint or run screaming. I would be a virgin for life. :(

It would be dragging on the floor. You'd need a sling. :p

Congrats Jennie, On your new boy toy.

Happy you found one. Finally, took you long enough lol

I know have not been around lately. Lots of dealing with things.

Adios,

Congrats Jennie, On your new boy toy.

Happy you found one. Finally, took you long enough lol

I know have not been around lately. Lots of dealing with things.

Adios,

Joe, how are you? I miss you.

How's little cheeks and wifey poo?

Don't be a stranger, I need my Dr. Evil around to keep these guys at bay. ;)

It would be dragging on the floor. You'd need a sling. :p

I think I would have to wrap it around my leg a couple times then tape it to my leg.

Good Idea, Well Adam good to see you here.

So so so happy to see you here. Not the Jenny happy but just happy that Jennie found a boy toy for herself.

You should come around more often you know.

Good Idea, Well Adam good to see you here.

So so so happy to see you here. Not the Jenny happy but just happy that Jennie found a boy toy for herself.

You should come around more often you know.

Hey Joe, It is really good to see you again. It has been awhile for me around these parts. I am glad to be making an appearance. I just have been busy and had a lot going on.

Well, my day is pretty much over here. I think I am going to go rent Jim Gaffigan and have a few laughs at his hot pocket skit.

Good Idea, Well Adam good to see you here.

So so so happy to see you here. Not the Jenny happy but just happy that Jennie found a boy toy for herself.

You should come around more often you know.

I asked you to be my boy toy,b ut you weren't around so I never got an answer :P I'm not sure if you would though ;)

Gah.

Internet went off. It was crazy- a whole day without technology.

I'm back though. My Amish day is over.

Sarah

Whew

Every night when I go home, the only internet I have is on my phone... my home network is not working due to the main computer not having a working Ethernet card... :(

Hey y'all, just checking in... things are a bit quiet tonight

Whew indeed BBJ!

Black-- Me thinks it's time to get that fixed!

Nikosmom-- well hallo there mz thang ;)

Sarah

Whew indeed BBJ!

Black-- Me thinks it's time to get that fixed!

Nikosmom-- well hallo there mz thang ;)

Sarah

Me thinks you be right, but alas, my coffers are running dry... :(

Sarah - what's BBJ :confused:
Blacky - "coffers"

Methinks I've been studying too long and have subsequently gotten dumber in the process... :(

My head hurts. My neck hurts. My shoulders hurt. My arse hurts. Sigh.

Hello all.

How's everyone's Wednesday been?

Glorious, I expect...

Hello all.

How's everyone's Wednesday been?

Glorious, I expect...

It's Wednesday! :eek:

Crap. :(

Sarah - what's BBJ :confused:
Blacky - "coffers"

Methinks I've been studying too long and have subsequently gotten dumber in the process... :(

My head hurts. My neck hurts. My shoulders hurt. My arse hurts. Sigh.

Coffer - A strongbox: a strong chest or box used for keeping money or valuables safe

The more you know... :D


Ahh pretty maiden, rest thou weary body and part-take in the merry-making of this congregation, if only for a moment.

It's Wednesday!? :eek:

Crap. :(

Nope... Thursday here for me... :cool:

Well, it was Wednesday... 14 minutes ago. Haha.

My head hurts. My neck hurts. My shoulders hurt. My arse hurts. Sigh.

Next time...
http://www.evercrest.com/images2/ext/astroglide.jpg

I think he makes a sexy model for Astroglide.

Sarah

Next time...
http://www.evercrest.com/images2/ext/astroglide.jpg

I think he makes a sexy model for Astroglide.

Sarah

That's a guy?? :eek:

*GULP*

I got to get my eyes checked... :(

Hey can anyone help me with this thread- I have no knowledge about this...

https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/family-law/married-mother-leaving-province-380991.html

Sarah

I thought it was a very homley-lookin' girl...

I thought it was a very homley-lookin' girl...

Homely... right... :o

Thats a guy??? :eek:

*GULP*

I gotta get my eyes checked... :(

I thought it was a girl too Black. :eek:

Well, it was Wednesday...14 minutes ago. Haha.

Now y'all got me all confused. What the hell day is it? :mad:

I thought it was a girl too Black. :eek:

Scary isn't it?

How would you feel if you saw that guy on the next "Bachelor" reality TV show? :eek:

Scary isn't it?

How would you feel if you saw that guy on the next "Bachelor" reality tv show? :eek:

I'd try to lose.

Homely... right... :o

Forgive me, I left my grammar Nazi hat outside today. Haha.