My boyfriend and I have been together for over 5 years. And he wants to adopt my 2 children who see him as dad.

Get married so the court sees it as stability for the kids and then he may be able to adopt them.
?Where is the bio dad in all this?
He would have to give his consent too.

First it is really great he wants to step up and do this.

Some states ( in the US) will require you be married at least a year, others will accept a long term relationship so that you will need to discuss with your attorney.

But the bio father will have to sign over his rights to allow the adoption. Where is he in this, does he ever visit, does he pay child support.
Is there a custody order in place, is there a child support order

Consult an attorney. You will need one to prepare the adoption petition. The attorney can explain what you need to do to qualify.

By the way I moved this from the Adoption forum. There is a Read First notice at the top that directs legal question to this forum.

Their dad sees them maybe 10 imes a year. And it always around the time we are suppose to go to court. He pays child support only when they put a warrant out of his arrest. My children do not care for him too much. They don't like his wife. She tells them that it's my fault he goes to jail. And he rather pay a lawyer to keep us from getting money. And he is holding us up from seeing a judge. Oh by the way we live in Texas. He either hires a lawyer or just does not shows up. Last year my children received a little bit over $4.oo a week each child. And we cannot talk or be in the same room due to he fact that he cannot communicate like an adult. He yells , cursses, and calls me everything but my name. My children don't like to see him when he is with his wife. And he won't leave his wife at home. So when he does want to see them I have to force them to go. He missed the last 2 times and this weekend he threatned to call the cops on me. And we are suppose to go to court this Wednesday, and says I am in contemp and now I have to pay his court fees.

You may be able to make a deal with him AFTER you check on the adoption thing and know how you are going to handle it and all.
You might be able to tell him that once he signs away his rights then he will only be responsible for his arrears. But then him seeing them would be another issue.

Why are you in contempt? Just because he says so doesn't make it so.

But none of that changes the answers we gave you. However, if he is not willing to relinquish his rights its unlikely you can get them terminated to allow the adoption. On the other hand, he may agree to the adoption since it will relieve him of his responsibilities towards the children.

Consult with an attorney that practices civil matters such as these. It can be a lengthy and costly process, especially if the biological father disputes the adoption. Is there some kind of insurance issue that is necessitating this assumption of parental rights?

A document signed by a judge that states your boyfriend is the legal guardian of your biological children is not going to make him any better of a father figure to your children.

Are the children aware of what you/he are trying to do.. Are they/would they be OK with it.. Sometimes, when people undertake this type of permanent maneuver, it has a negative impact on the status quo.

If there is not a problem and the necessity for this action is simply to :"be officially called dad", then it is my opinion that you are trying to fix something that is not broken. Things get real sticky with the biological father and possibly the paternal family. If things are working without this piece of paper, why mess with it..

If there is not a problem and the necessity for this action is simply to :"be officially called dad", then it is my opinion that you are trying to fix something that is not broken. Things get real sticky with the biological father and possibly the paternal family. If things are working without this piece of paper, why mess with it...?


Several reasons. Makng the commitment to be a legal father can make a big difference in a child's life. They have already been rejected by their father. So knowing someone WANTS to be their father can be important to them. There may aloso be issues of inheritance. If something were to happen to the mother, their legal father would gain custody. Obviously the children would not want to be back with their bio father.

It also sounds like your problems are not stemming from your boyfriend's capacity to adopt or be a father figure to your children, it looks like you should be focusing on terminating his visitation or placing a supervised visitation clause on the children's visit with the biological father.

Consult with an attorney that practices civil matters such as these. It can be a lengthy and costly process, especially if the biological father disputes the adoption. Is there some kind of insurance issue that is necessitating this assumption of parental rights?

A document signed by a judge that states your boyfriend is the legal guardian of your biological children is not going to make him any better of a father figure to your children.

Are the children aware of what you/he are trying to do...? Are they/would they be ok with it...? Sometimes, when people undertake this type of permanent maneuver, it has a negative impact on the status quo.

If there is not a problem and the necessity for this action is simply to :"be officially called dad", then it is my opinion that you are trying to fix something that is not broken. Things get real sticky with the biological father and possibly the paternal family. If things are working without this piece of paper, why mess with it...?

While I appreciate that your making an effort to answer questions lets try to stick with what we have in front of us and if there is anything else needed ask for more information.

The OP is not seeking guardianship for her boyfriend.. They are seeking adoption. Its 2 completely different things.

In a later post you refer to terminating his visitation rights or suggest he have supervised visits but the OP has said nothing of the sort.

Please stick to what's being asked or a reasonable curve for a line of thinking BEFORE you try answering the question.

Thanks.