Log in

View Full Version : Confusseeeddd about it all


jaimie02
Jul 4, 2009, 03:39 PM
I am currently go through some really tough times.

Im super stressed about my senior year of high school
I am super stressed about finding, applying, paying for college
I am very into politics, which right now is causing me slight anxiety

I am on edge because my family fights constantly. My dad mocks everything about me and can't accept me for me. ANd its impossible to talk to him and tell him how I feel. Ive tried it and he just mocks me more

On top of it I've been talking to this amazing guy, I am really really into him. We care about each other a lot, but a full out relationship is impossible because he is currently stationed in japan with the marines. Oh, and my mom totally disapproves because of our age difference and the fact that he has tattoos (she has friends with tatoos.. she knows it means nothing bad)

Our main form of contact is online. We have occasional long late night convos on the phone, but its really getting tough. But this realationship is teaching me how to be much stronger emotionally. This was until he told me that if for some reason we end up going to war with Korea, he will be among the first to be deployed. Well now Korea is launching missles and crap, which is really worring me.

I don't think I can stay strong anymore. I feel like if I don't do something soon I'm goonna have a horrible break down. I don't feel like I can talk to anyone about it because my family will just make me feel like I'm too whinny.. and I don't have a lot of really close friends, and the ones I do have.. well I don't know I just doent feel comfortable complainign to them. I would talk to that guy... because we litterlly talk about everything with each other, but I don't want to tell him because I don't want him to think I complain too much.

Oh and I haven't slept a full night in MONTHS!

Sorry this was so long. What should I do and how should I go about keeping my sanity?

N0help4u
Jul 4, 2009, 08:42 PM
You are going through a lot more than the typical teenager. I Know if I were you I would be tempted to tell my dad off by saying grow up you are suppose to be the adult example!

You have to take one day at a time and do the best you can. I know it can be hard but worrying and stressing does not add one second to your life or fix anything. In fact it does the opposite.
Hope everything works out for you and I know others will be answering this and have some replies that will be helpful.

jaimie02
Jul 5, 2009, 10:52 AM
So I am going into my Senior year of High School. Ive only had one boyfriend, and that wasn't even a real relationship, it lasted less than a month and ended badly.
Anyway, my point is, I'm the only one of all my friends who has never been in a real relationship and who has never kissed a guy.
Well I kissed a guy but it was like just a little kiss, not a real kiss.

And I just do not understand why I haven't hit this "milestone"

Not to come off stuck on myself, but according to everybody at my school I'm really pretty. And when I go out, guys are always staring and saying stuff, but no one wants a relationship. No one wants to get to know me.

But the bigger issue is, my friend is in the marines, and our relationship has kind of shifted to more than friends. But I don't know if I can do the whole reltionship thing well. I am scared for when he comes home because I don't have any real experience with relationships.

I just want to know what I should do. I am confused as to why I can't get a boyfriend here, in the US. And if I should pursue my relationship with my friend.

MAJOR CONFUSION! I don't even know exactly what my question is

Wondergirl
Jul 5, 2009, 11:01 AM
Stop thinking about a "relationship." Date all sorts of guys -- fat ones and cute ones and quiet ones and ugly ones -- to get experience in how guys think and what makes them tick -- and to get experience in how YOU think about things and what makes YOU tick. You say you are pretty. Do you scare guys away? Actually, they tend to be reluctant and too shy to ask out pretty girls because the guys figure they will get turned down. And when your Marine comes home, date him but not exclusively. Make sure he understands you need to find out who you are first before you can find out who you and he are together in a relationship.

jaimie02
Jul 5, 2009, 11:21 AM
Thank you and that does make a lot of sense.

I do think I may scare guys away a little because I am very opinionated, old fashioned, and independent.

And the really weird thing is, I do understand guys to an extent. I have given my friends so much advice that has fixed their relationships. I just can't do it myself.

jaimie02
Jul 6, 2009, 12:17 PM
Ive tried to talk to my dad calmly and rationally, and meanly and irrationally and either way I get punished.

I don't want to stress but I can't stay unstressed no matter what I try.

Ive actually started to fall into a state of depression and I just lay around all day feeling sorry for myself, and I don't like that.

But I can't go out and do anything because my parents constantly hound me.

Im the oldest and I know that's why its hard for them to let go some, but they just don't understand, no matter how much I talk to them and try to explain.

I just got in a fight with my mom because she thinks I don't want to tell her anything about my life and she's hurt because she thought we were closer. But I want to tell her its just when I do her face and tone imply that she's mad or upset. She doesn't take jokes as jokes and when I tell her the reson I don't tell her stuff is because of her reaction she just gets mad and yells at me.

Clough
Jul 7, 2009, 01:59 AM
Hi, jaimie02!

What's the one thing that bothers you the most, please?

Thanks!

jaimie02
Jul 7, 2009, 12:09 PM
Umm..

I'm not so sure what the one thing is.

artlady
Jul 7, 2009, 12:23 PM
If your Dad mocks you when you try to have a serious conversation,try writing him a letter.
Tell him how degraded he makes you feel when he does not take you seriously and how you would like your relationship with him to improve.
Give it to him and ask him to take it seriously and then walk away.

It is important to stay busy while on summer break.Too much time on your hands causes boredom and tends to make one over think things.

I have always found it helpful to keep a journal.It is very therapeutic and helps to sort out ones feelings.

You have one of the best years of your life coming up! Your whole world is about to change and while scary,it is also exciting and the possibilities are endless.My senior year was great because I was finally going to have the freedom I wanted!

Enjoy these years as much as you can my dear because before you know it,adult concerns will start to weigh on you.How to pay the rent,how to get a good job... etc.

Stay busy,do things that make you feel good about you and know that you are stronger than you think!