Hello,

I've been dating my boyfriend now for a little over a year now and I'm about to move in with him in the next week and a half. He is 20 yrs old and I'm turning 18.

He has admitted to me that he has had a lot of girlfriends and one night stands and that he is definitely by no means a virgin.
I've had sex with one guy but he doesn't know about it because he asked me if I was a virgin in front of people that I didn't want to know that I wasn't, so I lied.
He moved to Florida for a little while because he had to and just made it back to my state this April.
OUr relationship is going great, he tells me I'm beautiful, opens the door for me, kisses me all the time, in fact we kiss more than any couple I know but it's only when I'm about to leave to go home. Im wanting to ask him to have sex rather make love but I'm too nervous to get rejected. Ive gotten on top of him and he never did anything, even when I kiss him while I was on top of him he would just smile and kiss me back and that was it. I kiss him on the neck a lot too but just like fast kisses, I'm just wanting to know why he hasn't tried anything... he's spent the night with me several times and never tries anything then either, he doesn't even make out with me unless I'm leaving to go home. Im too nervous to ask him why or do anything to try to get things started because I'm shy and I want him to try first and I'm scared he won't want to. Am I doing something wrong?

First of all, starting a relationship with a lie will only end in heartbreak. Seeing as how he's pretty experienced he might know that you've lied about your virginity. I would spill the beans before you make the move to move in together. Otherwise things could end up messy.


And he's most likely waiting until you are 18 to have sex with you, because he doesn't want to get into trouble.

First as ChihuahuaMomma said you need to tell him you did have sex with your former boyfriend but didn't want the others to hear that when he asked. You should have told him immediately after they weren't around.

Second, if you are moving in with him you most likely will not have to tell him you want sex. It will come with moving in together. Again as ChihuahuaMomma said he is probably waiting for you to turn 18

You do need to tell him before you move in together or he is going to really resent you for lying to him.

Maybe he hasn't tried anything because he thinks you've never done anything and doesn't want to be that guy to take it from you

Also, maybe he cares about you more than other girls and wants it to be more special with you.

And if you two can't talk about it, you shouldn't do it.. it cliché but true

If you're moving in together things could change quickly

Hmm... well, I'm with my girl almost on a daily basis.
We both talk about sex openly with each other. However, we can both be with each other, alone, without the pressures of having sex. I mean, we will both lay on her bed or on the floor (I don't have a bed, bad back, xD), kick back, watch a movie, eat some popcorn, and just hangout.
I'll kiss her, and cuddle her, and maybe even we lay on top of each other once in a while, but it doesn't have to be about sex.

Just because the stereotype is "men think about sex every three seconds," doesn't mean it's true. Perhaps, your boyfriend just wants to wait with you, it doesn't mean anything bad towards you, or that he isn't intrested in you in that way.
Just like little children can innocently run around and play freed from their clothes, mature adults who practice self control can behave likewise.

However, given that, if he is sexually active, I'd also agree that he's probably waiting until you turn eighteen to prevent any possible legal ramifications.
I'm not going to preach to you about the dangers of sex, but before you do anything, you need to tell him, be open to talking to him about it, and ALWAYS practice safe(r) sex.

Why does he have to be told you've had sex already? I'm thinking, since you haven't told him yet, that that secret should stay with you. If you tell him now, he will wonder why it took you so long to be "honest."

The guy has already admitted to you that he has been with girls. The one night stands and all of that he has admitted to.

You two must be pretty serious to be moving in together. Maybe he knows that, and he has already discovered what has happened with all the other girls after sex. They are no longer with him. You are special to him and maybe he wants to keep you around for more than sex. Maybe he has fallen in love and sex isn't that big of a deal with you.

When it happens, which it will since you two are moving in together. Then that will be the right time for him and you. Just be patient. Good luck.