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rosecohen
Jun 6, 2009, 10:14 AM
I have a 9 year old daughter.. her mother and I divorced when she was 1 year old. I pay $400.00 a month in child support. My X remarried when my daughter was 1 1/2 years old. She has tempory custody I have a court order that I can see my daughter one day a week and get everyother weekend, holidays etc. Well 1 year ago she moved I do not know where she lives at she will not answer the phone return my calls I just found out where she works.. I get a call this week from my x-wife wanted me to sign over my rights so that her husband can adopt her but still wants me to pay child support. But not see here and tells me that this is my daughter's idea, but will not let me talk to her. I am not going to sign my daughter over to her. I can not get anyone to help me I have talked to social services the DA in the county which I live.. Can I get a court appointed attorney?

ScottGem
Jun 6, 2009, 10:42 AM
First, I would talk to the police. This is parental kidnapping. You have court ordered visitation that I assume you have kept up with until she moved. For her to move far enough away to affect your exercising your visitation without getting court approval is contempt of court. For her to move and not inform you where she moved is parental kidnapping.

So I would start by going to the police and swearing out a warrant for her arrest. They may give you a hard time but be insistent. I'm surprised the DA didn't tell you this. Since you didn't indicate where you live we can't give you the specific law.

After you swear out the warrant. You then file in your local Family Court to have her cited for contempt of court. You should have done this as soon as she moved. You do this, especially if the DA or police won't follow through on the arrest warrant. Since you know where she works, she can be arrested there. I assume you are paying your support through social services, so they know where she lives and you could have subpeoned that info.

You may not need a lawyer to do these things, but if she comes into court with an attorney, you better have one ready.

Finally, she can't force you to relinquish your rights. But she is wrong about continuing child support. If her husband is allowed to adopt the child, then your obligation for support ends.

It's a shame you didn't find us when she moved, you should not have waited a year to file contempt of court charges.

Good Luck and keep us posted.

rosecohen
Jun 6, 2009, 11:34 AM
Your answer was helpful, I am in North Carolina.. I will let you know what happens and if I have any more questions that you can help me with... But when I went to the department of social services they would not give me an address she is a friend with my X... when I went to the police they stated that they did not get involved in family matters and they could not help me I will try it again

ScottGem
Jun 6, 2009, 03:24 PM
Ok, I would go to the DA, not the police. The police don't always know the law. Tell the DA that yopu want to swear out a complaint of kidnapping against the mother under NCGS 14.41 Which states:
§ 14‑41. Abduction of children.
(a) Any person who, without legal justification or defense, abducts or induces any minor child who is at least four years younger than the person to leave any person, agency, or institution lawfully entitled to the child's custody, placement, or care shall be guilty of a Class F felony.

Show the prosecutor a copy of your court order that allows you visitation one day a week and alternate weekends. Tell him that the mother moved without notice or permission and has refused to let you know where she is or provide access to the child as required under the court order.

If you do go to the police instead of the DA, refer them to the same law and insist that they uphold and enforce this law. While its true the police don't often get involved in family disputes, this goes beyond a family dispute, since its defined as kidnapping under your state's law. A Class F Felony is criminal not family or civil.

The person in social services was within their rights not to provide you with the address just because you went in and asked. But the information could have been subpeoned had you gone to the prosecutor or back to the Family court that issued the order.

Now, I'm going to provide a caveat here. The law states; "without legal justification or defense". We are only hearing your side of this story. We do not know if the mother had good and legal reasons to do what she did. If she did, this will come out in court so you need to be prepared to address those claims. There are other factors here like were you adhering to the visitation schedule. If you were not spending the time allowed by the court with her, this may be held against you. I'm just trying to have you approach this with eyes wide open. But if your story is as you related it, that she up and moved a year ago without notification and has prevented you from exercising your rights under the court order, then she should be prosecuted for parental kidnapping or, at least, contempt of court.

From a practical matter however, you don't want her fully prosecuted. You just want to use the law to assert your rights. How do you think your daughter will take it if you put her mother in jail. The DA will probably bring this up. If they do, agree with them that you really don't want her in jail, but you do want to maintain your relationship with your daughter as you had been doing. And if using the statute I cited is the only way, then that's what you want, but if they can provide an alternative you are open.

Another question that will probably be asked is why you waited so long. The answer to that is you didn't know what your rights were. You tried talking to Soc Svces and the police who provided no assistance. But you did more research and found this statute.

Good Luck and keep us posted.

Fr_Chuck
Jun 6, 2009, 06:11 PM
Yes, when she first moved was when you needed to act first, you may have stopped her from moving or even ordered her back.

But if she is refusing to allow your visits you can also take her back to court for contempt

stinawords
Jun 6, 2009, 08:18 PM
They both did a great job answering you so all I can really add is good luck and please come back to let us know how it all went for you. If you have any more questions feel free to ask. But the sooner you act the better so Monday morning you should get on it.