Thought I'd start a lighter thread. Maybe sometimes humor is good during tough times.

1. If it's meant to be, it's meant to be.

Worst line ever. Does anyone actually believe this? I mean really? The correct line should be:

--If it's meant to be, you make it be.

2. I need space.

No, you don't. Be honest.

--I need you out of my life... maybe for good.

3. I think we need a break.

Yeah right.

--I want to break up with you.

So, you guys got some more classic lines?

"i just dont want to be in a relationship right now, but if i did it would be with you"

Which really means the first four words and the last one... "i just dont want...you."

A girl I dated fed me this, and then was on the prowl after another guy within 2 months.

Or along the lines of the meant to be comment, "well be together again someday, if its our fate"

Another girl fed something like that to me... which means "if fate would have us trapped down a mine shaft, and theres no way out, then i guess i could go for you one last time if i had to."

I need more. (More what? Therapy? More sex?)

I am just not feeling it right now.

There is no spark (Which is the biggest farse - love takes many months to develop - RUN from these women - they live andie for smitten - lust - they don't get it)

"I don't know what I want" (which of course means I know that I don't want you.)

"It might have worked out if we hadn't become so close" (your guess is as good as mine on that one)

'I have to find myself" Before I was married I got dumped so many times I lost count. But this was a favorite one " just get out and bother somebody else" or 'You'll find someone else" uughh!

Not really a breakup line, but a "line" that a girl thought I used on her was

"id like to see you, but i have to fix the dishwaher"

A girl who really liked me had called me up to see if id come over, and I was mildly interested, enough to have entertained the trip, but I was still in HS in my mothers house and the dishwasher WAS broken and she was freaking out about it... soooo... I really WAS trying to fix the dishwasher. The girl told all of her friends I completely fed her the worst line ever to blow her off.

1 - "I think of you more as a brother" - makes you wonder what kinkiness goes on when you're not around...
2 - "You remind me of my father" - ditto
3 - "We can still be friends" - yeah, right - I haven't slept with any of my bowling buddies...

3 - "We can still be friends" - yeah, right - I haven't slept with any of my bowling buddies...

Classic!! How did I miss this one.

We can still be friends... you know, the kind of friend who wants to throw up every time you think about the time you wasted on this loser... er, friend.

1 -
3 - "We can still be friends" - yeah, right - I haven't slept with any of my bowling buddies...

How could I forget the famous last words of my high school sweetheart!!

How about "we don't communicate?" (Translation: "I'm afraid to share my feelings with you.") There's also the old classic "It's just not working out." (Translation: "I'm too much of a coward to tell you what's really on my mind.") I actually once had a woman tell me "You're not affectionate, you're a hard person to get to know", etc. and wanted me to believe that was why she was ending our relationship. However, as I look back, I have to admit that I made the classic mistake that everyone on this forum warns against ; being over clingy and obsessive. I really think she needed some space and I wasn't giving it to her. It's very interesting that her excuse to me was practically the exact opposite of what was really bothering her. How's that for irony and a lack of courage of one's convictions?

"I love you, but im just not IN love with you".

Oh c'mon.. What a cop out...

The first time I heard this I cried for days. Now I laugh out loud.

I must be getting better.
Hahaha

My ex used this one as she was breaking up with me:

"I know you love me, but you don't like me."

Right, that's why I suggested we go to counseling, figure out why things aren't working, how can we try and make things work. That's why I didn't leave her, she left me. But that clearly shows that I didn't like her.

Did we really forget...

"It's not you....it's me"??

No it's really YOU!

Why we broke up...

She told me we couldn't afford beer anymore and
I'd have to quit. Then I caught her spending:

-$65.00 on make-up,
-$150 for a cut & color,
-$30 for a manicure,
-$40 for a pedicure,
-$50 on vitamins,
-$300 on clothes and
-$600 for a gym membership.

I asked how come I had to give up stuff and not
Her. She said she needed it to look pretty for me.
I told her that was what the beer was for.
... I don't think she's coming back.

Okay - just one more at the risk of wearing my welcome thin... A friend of mine relayed this classic to me - true story that happened to him...

"No Walter*, I'm afraid I can't go out with you again next weekend - I getting married this Saturday"...

(*names were changed to protect our friendship)

Oh, how about "You deserve/will find someone better." Yah, okay. I don't even know what the hell that means. Really, if someone knows enlighten me.

You deserve better is great!!

OMG... these are sooo funny!! :D

Now let's be honest here... I've used a line or two myself! Hasn't anyone else?:o

"We're too different".

Oh really, since when? We seemed fine 5 minutes ago.

Translation:

"I don't want you anymore".

"Your Just Too Good For Me."

Translation= You just aren't good enough for me too continue.

I adore you, but I have issue to figure out

I love you so much and you mean so much to me, but I need to work on myself so we can be equal partners.

How about...

"I just don't want to be in a relationship right now" (2 weeks later he's in a new relationship... hmmm)

"You're perfect" (what? Trying to make me feel good as you break up w/ me?)

"You're too good/nice" (Oh, so after complaining about how your past gf's cheated on you and left you for someone else you said you wanted someone who would treat you right... but I guess now you want to go back to someone who will treat you like crap? Ok)

"If we stay together I'll probaly end up marrying you..." (?? )

"I still love/care about you" (b s)

"I still see you as my best friend..." (whatever)

How about the line leading up to these break up lines, "we have to talk."
-This crap line just makes me worry, I HATE IT!

I also just received this line, by text message, about I week ago :(
This thread has cheered my up a bit, Thanks

How about - " I think the world of you. I don't want you out of my life. I just want our relationship to be over". Translation: "You're sweet, but I'm tired of sleeping with you, I need to go bang other sluttier girls." : )

3. I think we need a break.

Yeah right.

--I want to break up with you.

I totally agree. Two months ago, my ex-boyfriend told me he wanted to take a break until he got out of school for the summer. Yet last weekend he came home for the summer, and he has still not tried to contact me.

Oh and I completely forgot to include his breakup lines...

"you my "girlfriend" and i've cheated on you time and time again. i can't have a real relationship now. i drink and do stuff with girls. i can't control it. and im not going to stop going out because i have a gf. i don't want to waste the best years of my life cause i have a gf. so alls im saying is....i want to go on a break until i get back from school. "

This was over an IM by the way. I saved it, I don't really know why.

Oh, my ex did that too. He gave me the "we need a break, but i still love you and want a future with you" speech... then 2 weeks into it broke up with me, giving me the "the purpose of the break was to give me time to think...." speech.

Oh and I completely forgot to include his breakup lines...

"you my "gf" and i've cheated on you time and time again. i can't have a real relationship now. i drink and do stuff with girls. i can't control it. and im not going to stop going out because i have a gf. i don't want to waste the best years of my life cause i have a gf. so alls im saying is....i want to go on a break until i get back from school. "

This was over an IM by the way. I saved it, I don't really know why.

This guy seems like a real a. hole. He wants to have fun while at school, and by "going on a break" with you until he gets back from school, he is just securing some "fun" at home too. Its pigs like this that give guys a bad reputation. Please tell me you don't see him anymore!

This guy seems like a real a. hole. He wants to have fun while at school, and by "going on a break" with you until he gets back from school, he is just securing some "fun" at home too. Its pigs like this that give guys a bad reputation. Please tell me you don't see him anymore!!

Well he came home from school last weekend, and has not contacted me yet. I kind of wish he would've just broke it off completely when he told me he wanted to take a break, because then I wouldn't have that small piece of hope left in my heart telling me that he might come back to me. And you said that he just wants to secure some "fun" at home during the summer, I wish we could be together during the summer, even if it means breaking up when he goes back to school. I doubt he'll come back to me though. His entire family hates me and we got in a big fight after we broke up.

Well he came home from school last weekend, and has not contacted me yet. I kind of wish he would've just broke it off completely when he told me he wanted to take a break, because then I wouldn't have that small piece of hope left in my heart telling me that he might come back to me. And you said that he just wants to secure some "fun" at home during the summer, I wish we could be together during the summer, even if it means breaking up when he goes back to school. I doubt he'll come back to me though. His entire family hates me and we got in a big fight after we broke up.

Well, I hope you can work things out with him, and his family. Who knows, maybe he has matured and will be looking for a serious relationship...
Anyway I wish you luck with him

How about 'you just don't understand me'

And then when you ask what they mean, to elaborate on exactly what it is you don't get, she tells you that she shouldn't have to explain it, you should know.

And she wonders why you 'don't understand'??

:confused:

Oh, how about "You deserve/will find someone better." Yah, okay. I don't even know what the hell that means. Really, if someone knows enlighten me.

You know what did you have to answer?
This:

Ah I know I'm much better than you and you don't deserve me, but you are enough for me for time being, lets just have some fun!

"We're too different".

Oh really, since when? We seemed fine 5 minutes ago.

Translation:

"I don't want you anymore".

That's exactly what he told me: " we are too different!" but we never felt the difference really... better to leave instead of buls***tting! (sorry for being rude)

How about "It's not you.......It's me."

"I'm not quite over my ex yet." Even though I've been having sex with you for the past 3 months.

"We should take a break" "So I can get over my ex."

"I'm not sure what I want right now." 12 hrs ago we know what you wanted!

"I really need to focus on my job"

And my all time favorite...
"I need my space." "I don't want to be with anyone right now." Well, for a couple of days anyway.




I really like the broken dishwasher though.
I'll never forget that one! Ha Ha


Then there's the:

e-mail breakup, the text message breakup, The best friend tells you breakup, the voicemail breakup, and the never calls you again breakup!

e-mail breakup, the text message breakup, The best friend tells you breakup, the voicemail breakup, and the never calls you again breakup!

Oh, can't forget the myspace breakup

Oh, can't forget the myspace breakup

How about when you check your Facebook, and the girlfriend just changed her status to "single." Then you call and say what's that about, and THEN, she breaks up with you. That one really sucks.

These impersonal break ups are the worst, have the courage to do it face to face.

"Get the h#&^%$ out of my &%#@*))&% house and don't bring your%&*(%# a7$^^***^ back again"
At least I knew where I stood, and where I better not ever stand again. But I had closure!

"Get the h#&^%$ out of my &%#@*))&% house and don't bring your%&*(%# a7$^^***^ back again"
At least I knew where I stood, and where I better not ever stand again. But I had closure!

Hahaha

I'm going to have to say that's as easy a break up could probably be to understand.

"I'm not quite over my ex yet."


I just got this one last week... Along with...

"I don't feel that spark we had before"

And

"I think we spend too much time together"

Yup, all three came out in the same break-up. Spaced apart of course because I contradicted each one.

This happened twice with two different girls in a year's time. I saw each one less than a month.

Girl 1:
"I don't want a relationship, when I went to that party tonight I hooked up with someone"
"Awesome, I hooked up with someone too! And I don't know where you're getting this relationship business, I never had any intention of dating you seriously".
Evil stare

Girl 2:
"I think you want a relationship, and you know I don't want one right now."
(You can't be serious... not this again)
"But if your in the area I'd love to see you again."
Sigh... "[Girl's name], I couldn't care less if I never see you again". Bam!
Evil stare

And the most recent break-up was a text message, and that was the one girl I actually respected... go figure.

I can't handle being in a relationship, this is big to me, and I can't do it. Bul****!

You want marriage and I don't. (just point this out, he was the one suggesting marriage?. im still confused)

Three months later he could handle being in a relationship... with someone else.

Ohhh okayyy " i needed to do this for myself i just dont wana be in a relatonship anymore.."waittt.. through a text message worst possible way to break it off.

" I want to treat you like my queen but I dont have the money ot the time to do so, once I finish school, get a stable job and make some money, once I have all the time in the world to concentrate on you , then we'll make it work ... I will always love you, I can't imagime myself growing old without you"


BULL! Bs and more bs.

"I don't know who I am anymore"... Ohhh no wonder, that other girl was way nicer.

"If we are both still single at 30, let's get married"... I actually felt special when I heard this one, but I was 18 and stupid.

"We never have fun"... Because you are clinically depressed, is that really my fault?

Ok, because I'm not always a victim, here are some I have used, don't flame me. I was younger.

"My life is too hectic and I don't have the time to give you what you need or want, you deserve better"... I meant it, honestly. I was single for another two years after that girl. I still feel crappy when I think about how undeserving I was of her affection back then. She is better off too, married and happy.

"I need a break from you"... Once again. I didn't want to end it. I just wanted to breathe and prioritize my life. I was head over heels in love, but stressed out from all of the demands made on me. We eventually got back together, but I don't think she ever forgave me for that and we broke up a few months later.

"I never understand abit of you and what you are thinking"

My ex fed me with this and moments later where talks about the relationship she sounded interested in me and said she gave me all the Bs(She said she likes another guy when we break up) its because she understands me and know that I would not give up if she didn't say it in that way. Get the point? Hahahaha, what an As.hol

My ex said after 5yrs. "I want to be single"

This was one of my favorites that my ex's used

"Its not that i don't love you its that i just don't want to cheat on you"

"I'm not breaking up with you i just think were better off as girlfriend/boyfriend buddies"

"I have to focus on soccer." And he go kicked off the soccer team

L.E.A.V.E!

This is what I used for my ex who cheated on me 4 weeks ago. That was it. I offered no further discussion, no chances for him to continue lay out his excuses. I even washed my lips and hands with soaps in front of him to humiliate him. I cannot think of anything clearer than that!
(So, actually it is the best one since I gave him the permanent closure.
No confusion whatsoever.)
Oh, it is followed by 4 weeks of NC so far...

Written sign on my door for my ex who constantly knocked my apartment door to talk to me:

Notice:
This entrance is for a loyal & faithful person only.
Please do not knock or ring for life time, if you are not qualified.

Is it clear enough?? Thanks.

"My feelings have changed for you. I still have love for you but it's not the same love."

FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFf that!

Thought I'd start a lighter thread. Maybe somtimes humor is good during tough times.

1. If it's meant to be, it's meant to be.

Worst line ever. Does anyone actually believe this? I mean really? The correct line should be:

--If it's meant to be, you make it be.

2. I need space.

No, you don't. Be honest.

--I need you out of my life...maybe for good.

3. I think we need a break.

Yeah right.

--I want to break up with you.

So, you guys got some more classic lines?

How about "it's not you, it's me"
"i need to focus on my career right now" ( suddenly had to despite not having to before)
"You're too good for me"

He literally used all of these when breaking up with me and said I can't date you anymore. What a coward, he could not even tell me the truth.
Hahah Yeah right.

The funny part is he says he "doesn't have time" to have a girlfriend to one of my best friends a month later and yet has pursued other women this whole time. I have literal proof and have heard through the grape vine.
Almost all guys are the same.

What are those lines going to be a hundred years from now?

Same thing? I hope not.

Just make sure what you say. And think about what you say.

But, with breakups, at that point, its too late.

More importantly, say what you say every day to the ones you love and mean it.

But most importantly, deliver your actions in truth, those speak loader.

We all know those cowardly BS lines...

This is what I got from the love of my life...

"I'm not the same person I used to be" "I feel miserable and I quit"

I haven't spoken to her since!
We had such great times. Sometimes I feel it was my fault. I just don't see how though because I only did one thing wrong and it was something she did like 4 times. Go figure.

I think one of the funniest I've ever heard was what my ex told me when she broke up with me and it was " i dont think i love you enough to wait for u to finish university." I thought that was ridiculous because you either love some one and accept him the way he is and stand by his side or you just don't love him and move on.

Might as well been 3 PhD's...
Good one.

My ex fiancée of ten years ended our relationship with

We are just too different, we could not come together. We became Complacent.

Which really means-I have someone else, and I am bored with you.

"Brad Pitt also found Angelina, and life is good for him".

How about the classic, "You don't listen to me."

I listen when you talk. But unfortunately my mind reading abilities are not functioning.

An ex boyfriend once said to me.. " I just can't be the bf that you want me to be"..

I was thinking but what kind of boyfriend do I want you to be? I still don't know I should've asked lol

Although I have been guilty of the using the "we're just too different" line..

As well as "I wanna go on a break for a while"

And also ending it over text :S

I'm much more mature these days though haha

Ugh... this is my worst break-up experience... my ex ruby the day of told me that she wasn't ready to be in a RELATIONSHIP, but that she still wanted to be friends... 2 months later, she got with a girl in her cosplay group >.>