View Full Version : Do women keep tabs on their ex's?
Fizzy Burst
Feb 27, 2009, 06:32 PM
So I need to pull away from this ex situation. It's like she is keeping tabs on me, and wants to know everything I am doing. She has a new boyfriend, which really seems to be a rebound but that's besides the point. I'm over that, accept it, and know that we are not getting back together nor do I want to. I can talk to her as a friend, not be hateful, have hard feelings towards her, or be all sad over it. It seems like she wants to know what I'm doing all of the time though and checking up on me. Yesterday I was on a date, and she knew that. On my way home I get a text message from her wanting to know what I was doing. I was talking to her a few nights ago online, but wasn't in a talking mood, got off the computer, and she got pissed at me for not saying good night. I don't know what her deal is. I took the pics I had of us off myspace for a 2nd time, and she comes out of the blue with the statement "why did you take out pics off"? But it's only when it's convenient for her. I sent her a message telling her I hope she has a good weekend. I get one back saying "I'm with chris I'll talk to you later". What's the deal here? It's kind of funny too, because she is making it a point to rub this new boyfriend into my face. Anyway, do the ladies really keep tabs on their ex's? When you break up with your boyfriends do you expect us not to move on with our lives and just sit there in a pool of tears? That's really what's going through my mind right now, because it seems like that is what she is doing.
Survivor07
Feb 27, 2009, 06:45 PM
Yes, some girls do keep track of their ex for these reasons:
A. There is a true friendship and they sincerely care
B. YOU are Plan B. If new boyfriend doesn't work out, they want to keep the door open with the ex so they have someone to be with until the next new boyfriend comes along
C. They are still in love with YOU and are trying to get you back.
MzRene
Feb 27, 2009, 06:57 PM
Yes, most females keep tabbs on their exes. I even admit to doing it. It doesn't matter if she broke up with you or if you broke up with her. For most people its to see if you have a new girl or not. And if you have a new girl does she compare to her. The questions that run through our minds are: Does she look better than me? What does he see in her? What is it about her that makes him want her instead of me? Even if your ex doesn't make it seem like she is hurting; she is. And she is rubbing the new guy in your face to try and make you jealous and miss her. She is checking up on you to see if you are hurting as much as she is. Yeah, its crazy but its just something we do. In the end she is going to want you back and she is doing all of this to get attention. Hopes this helps.
MiSSsy111222
Feb 28, 2009, 04:07 AM
My hand is up I kept tabs. It was because I wanted him back, and I wanted friendship as well. I was so used to that person I didn't want to let go. I wanted to see how he was feeling about us. And when I saw that he was moving on I tried clinging a little bit harder. Sad I know! Anyway curiosity killed the cat!
Sounds to me like she is keeping tabs because she is curious or mabye she wants you back. I actully feel sorry for her new boyfriend.
adam_89
Feb 28, 2009, 04:47 AM
Some People do keep tabs on their exes. It's kind of a natural thing to most. Some can't help to wonder what is going on in their exes life. So, they will do a little asking around or snooping.
talaniman
Feb 28, 2009, 10:20 AM
I think its you keeping her in your life and being a friend is the problem. Neither of you has let go, and her words, and actions confuse you. That's a sure sign, your not as over her as you think, or you would be able to take what she does in stride and not give it a second thought............. if indeed, you have accepted it as a friendship, and are not harboring false hopes for more.
Time to be honest with yourself, if you can't handle this friendship.
Friends don't question the actions of their friends, they accept it and keep moving in life.
Survivor07
Feb 28, 2009, 12:04 PM
I agree with Talaniman. He is exactly right.
It doesn't sound like you are over the romantic relationship.
Friends truly care about each other and want the other to be happy.
If a friendship is what you want, some time needs to pass before you communicate again. Then see how you feel about it.