I met this lovely man at church he is 40 years of age. I am 29. First of all our couple of months were brilliant. He was unemployed and I am still unemployed. We went away to places and had fun together all the time, I understood he had friends and I let him go. Towards our relationship now we have been going out for 6 months I am still unemployed but he has a great job earning amazing money. (X4 the average mans salary). I am not interested in his money. I am on benefits. I pay for a lot of things such as when we go out I pay my share. I pay for food. I do the cleaning, washing and cooking, occasionally he does the cooking. I am looking at starting up my own mail order business. I am also looking at doing cleaning as well for a little while. I have made friends, because before I met this man he knew all about my problems. I have financial difficulty. I am trying to get better with my money. I had problems making friends. I have met a lady over the internet and potential lady friends are on the way too. I have joined an Alpha group with the church which is around other people. I attend when he feels able, sometimes he comes home too tired to go out to a church pub do. I have done everything possible to keep this man. He too has problems. I don't know if he loves me. He gave me a lot of love last night & this morning. I told him I didn't feel loved. Because when he comes home from work, he has his dinner which I have made for him. He then goes on his computer in the other room for a couple of hours. If I go into give him a cuddle he goes to play his piano in the other room. Then sometimes he goes to the gym to work out and to meet his friends in the sauna for 2 hours. He came in the other day, had his dinner and went for a walk by himself for an hour. I know I am needy, but I am afraid of losing him. I have moved in with him. We have been living together for 6 months now. I have no where else to go. Maybe he's just being a good samaritan. I am lost here. What do I do..?

It sounds like he may just like having some time to himselg-if he does have this high paying job as you say then he probably is under an enormous amount of stress at work because of it.

The fact that as you say you have problems meeting friends and are currently unemployed might make you needier then how he is.

Everyone needs a little time, as everyone else says try talking to him about it and see how he responds.

You really need to get your own act together, and be happy with yourself, and the life you build as your way to dependent on him.



He gave me a lot of love last night & this morning. I told him I didn't feel loved.


Just because you live together doesn't mean your not responsible for your own happiness.

He has a life, and you need on.