I don't date, but I do have a preference. I like young gals, say 5-10 year difference.
I am not saying I don't like women close to my age or older for that matter. But its perhaps like a fantasy.

I hope I am not sick... I am 28 and would like a girl under 20
Is that a huge age differences... and tell you what the girl I liked who is 4 yr younger is dating someone almost 20 years older!

Also I am a virgin and would like to loose my virginity with a virgin so that we can share the same experience... its just fantasy , that I can't let go. In fact I have passed good looking gals due to these obsessions!


Help

Good luck to you!

If you were 35 and wanted a girl in the 25-30 yr range, I wouldn't bat an eye. But stating you want a girl under 20 is very borderline.

Frankly, I think you are either shallow or obsessed or both. Relationships are built on who the person is, not how old they are. And In my opinion, there is no advantage to losing your virginity with another virgin. In fact I think it's a disadvantage.

WHY don't you date?

That to me is a more serious statement about your issues than the fact that you like younger women.

Is it the fact that older women have more experience and backbone, and that intimidates you? Or that you like the idea of moulding a girl to your standards?

The fact that you do NOT date, think about younger women, and have fantasies of losing your virginity to another virgin makes me think that you should PROBABLY see a counselor.

Expressing your preference for specific women when you aren't even dating is a bit creepy, to me.

Holding out for losing your virginity with another virgin is like two people who have never camped deliberately going camping with each so that they can share the experience of having the tent fall down, the bear getting their food, getting lost, and going hungry because they wanted to share the experience of not knowing how to do things right.

Live it up! Find someone you like, whether she's a virgin or not. I'd advise focusing on women a little older, at least 21. But really, there's no reason to limit it to younger women. If you end up liking someone and staying with her, she will not stay young. She will grow older. If ten years down the road, you've still got your obsession with 18 year olds, and she's 30, what are you going to do? Dump her and start over? I think you need to get over your obsession.

I'm going to go out on a limb and guess that part of your obsession with younger women is related to performance insecurity. I'm thinking maybe you hope that if they are young and virginal, you won't have to be embarrassed about being a virgin yourself. But if a woman is the right person for you, she will be kind and patient and not make you feel bad. But you have to be open to being taught, not assume you have to be the man in charge.

There may be cultural differences here that aren't familiar with. Jus' sayin'

If ten years down the road, you've still got your obsession with 18 year olds, and she's 30, what are you going to do? Dump her and start over? I think you need to get over your obsession.

I'm going to go out on a limb and guess that part of your obsession with younger women is related to performance insecurity. .

I do have a little obsession but its not like I will always be look for a virgin every time I want to have sex. I just want that experience and saving myself for that too. I am a little picky I guess.
Performance security... never thought about that.
Thanks though

It's not a problem so long as it's legal.

Not dating will make it pretty hard to find any girl, 20 or older, you got to get out there pal.

I have the opposite preference, I like my women considerably older. As far as I can remember I always have, I used to have crushes on my pre-school teachers, especially third grade (Mrs. McDonna... mmmm). It's probably 'cause older women look, well, like women and not like girls... that little girl look bothers me. Anyway, it stuck with me even now at 23.

I think Synnen is right.
Why aren't you dating?

Ask someone out without the expectation of sex.

It sounds like you have become used to thinking of women primarily in terms of what it will be like in bed with them.

18-25 year old women (guys too) are very immature compared to people in thir 30's. There is a lot of emotional maturation that occurs berfore your late 20's. It sounds like you are fixated on what they look like instead of what you should be focusing on which is who they are. Cute doesn't make relationships with there is a casm of emotional maturity differences between you both.

Yeah its legal if they are 18, but that doesn't make it a good or even a smart idea.

I'm NOT making swipes at any of the younger people... these are factual things you will see for yourself when you approach 30.

THere is less emotional difference between 30 and 60 years of age than there is between 20 and 30.

WHY don't you date?

That to me is a more serious statement about your issues than the fact that you like younger women.

Is it the fact that older women have more experience and backbone, and that intimidates you? Or that you like the idea of moulding a girl to your standards?

The fact that you do NOT date, think about younger women, and have fantasies of losing your virginity to another virgin makes me think that you should PROBABLY see a counselor.

Expressing your preference for specific women when you aren't even dating is a bit creepy, to me.

Well I don't date that is true, because of the culture I am from... long story short I have never been on a date... never been kissed.

I am not intimidated by older women or molding is out of the window.. I want real girl.

In fact number of times I liked a girl tried to make a move turns out she is married and have children... seems like all the good ones are taken.

I'll repeat I don't have any thing against older women or close to mine older/younger.

With younger gals I like the attitude perhaps... since I missed the High School experience of dating, prom and other teenage stuff. I have grown up in boys school all my life and during college I had two job used to work 50hr over the weekend, and full time school living alone. It just never happened.

I don't think counselor can help here... I am not creepy or at least I was hoping I am not.

Its just that the idea of fresh start mentally and physically +
There is another thing now that is hard to get over with the idea of a girl and just thinking how many s she must have sucked makes me sick. Hopefully I'll get over it when I fall in love but I am you know time is ticking by and it just stinks.

I don't watch porn or addicted to watching young gals. All I was saying was 18 to 21, do I have a shot or what
Man I am so confused!!


Thank you for your response though.
Just be honest

If you were 35 and wanted a girl in the 25-30 yr range, I wouldn't bat an eye. But stating you want a girl under 20 is very borderline.

Frankly, I think you are either shallow or obsessed or both. Relationships are built on who the person is, not how old they are. And IMHO, there is no advantage to losing your virginity with another virgin. In fact I think its a disadvantage.

See I am not shallow or obsessed ( well perhaps a little obsessed with a good start or the start I want) is that too much to ask for. I mean okay I said under 20 (that sound a little off) but 21 or 22 will also work.
Lol

How is it the disadvantage??

I am not looking to a advantage or disadvantage... its the experience or perhaps a want. Like I don't want certified pre-owned which is perfect, I want Brand new

There may be cultural differences here that aren't familiar with. Jus' sayin'

Thanks for taking a deeper look

Since there is a cultural difference here I will explain the point I was making a little differently.

Yes the younger ones might be less likely to be married. What I am trying to explain is that what her mindset is today and what she likes today will change before her late 20's. Plus your mindset is more where it will be most of your adult life hers is not yet there. The risk is in a few years as she changes she will find out you have not changed with her and your interests are no longer the same, this means unhappy marriage and conflict.

I am assuming you are not from a culture that typically does arrainged marriages but one where people actually pick their own spouses.

I think you are attracted to teenagers because you and a younger woman are on the same emotional and experiential level. It makes sense to me that, in effect, you are equals of sorts in that respect.

Speaking from American culture, I would consider you immature and frightened of mature hetero sexuality at your age 28.

I really can't speak for Islamic culture, or other non-Western cultures.

Best wishes to you, :)

18-25 year old women (guys too) are very immature compared to people in thir 30's. There is a lot of emotional maturation that occurs berfore your late 20's. It sounds like you are fixated on what they look like instead of what you should be focusing on which is who they are. Cute doesn't make relationships with there is a casm of emotional maturity differences between you both.

Yeah its legal if they are 18, but that doesn't make it a good or even a smart idea.

I'm NOT making swipes at any of the younger people....these are factual things you will see for yourself when you approach 30.

THere is less emotional difference between 30 and 60 years of age than there is between 20 and 30.

But don't you think I'm missing that part. Enjoying the im-maturity. I mean I think every thing has a charm. And that age has a charm too. Yeah perhaps at that age they are imature and things are not going to be rock solid... but there is no saying it won't happen say with some one who is in late 20s or in 30's for that matter; I am going to 28 so not too far.

I agree with the emotional differences, b ut that is what I want to experience to go with physical thingy.

Thanks for the response.

But don't you think I'm missing that part. Enjoying the im-maturity. I mean I think every thing has a charm. And that age has a charm too. Yeah perhaps at that age they are imature and things are not going to be rock solid....but there is no saying it wont happen say with some one who is in late 20s or in 30's for that matter; I am going to 28 so not too far.

I agree with the emotional differences, b ut that is what I want to experience to go with physical thingy.

Thanx for the response.
Its not the same because you aren't part of that age group any longer... You are only watching it from outside. Its different if you were also in that age group because you would be maturing as well as her... thats far different as she will be maturing into a different person while you don't change as well because you have already moved on to the next stage in life... like it or not there is no turning back the clock. I see a very big chance for heartache because of that. You can't possibly experience that youth again... once its gone its gone and you are beyond that. Reliving the past is only possible in science fiction movies.

I'm not saying people don't try... there is a period in most mens life about the late 30'd to early 40's were they try to do things they wanted to do and never did for any number of reasons... sometimes its stuff people decades younger might do if they could afford it. Its commonly called a "midlife crisis". Some guys get in serious trouble... divorces happen, injuries occur etc. Not every guy does this but many do, and some things are dumb or dangerous... only a few are harmless.

See I am not shallow or obsessed ( well perhaps a little obsessed with a good start or the start I want) is that too much to ask for. I mean okay I said under 20 (that sound a little off) but 21 or 22 will also work.
lol

How is it the disadvantage ???

I am not looking to a advantage or disadvantage .....its the experience or perhaps a want. like I don't want certified pre-owned which is perfect, I want Brand new

Yes you are shallow, because you want a fantasy based on something I'm not sure of, rather than something real. The most important thing in a relationship is how each partner feels about the other. You may never get that, because you are rejecting people based on your fantasy. That's shallow.

Until you start dating and experience a relationship (not necessarily sexual) with a variety of woman, then what you are after is a fantasy you have built up in YOUR mind. And yes that is where counseling WILL help you.

As for the virgin thing, Asking gave a good answer. With the blind leading the blind you have a recipe for disaster. This is not a "good start" but a bad one. You may find it takes a long time to get it good, if ever.

But the main point bears repeating (and repeating). What you have done is build up a fantasy based on whatever. Maybe a westernized or cultural depiction of what its supposed to be, but not what it is in reality. And when a fantasy is dashed by reality, it will hurt even more.

Since there is a cultural difference here I will explain the point I was making a little differently.

Yes the younger ones might be less likely to be married. What I am trying to explain is that what her mindset is today and what she likes today will change before her late 20's. Plus your mindset is more where it will be most of your adult life hers is not yet there. The risk is in a few years as she changes she will find out you have not changed with her and your interests are no longer the same, this means unhappy marriage and conflict.

I am assuming you are not from a culture that typically does arrainged marriages but one where people actually pick their own spouses.

Ouch!

Arranged marriage... I am in USA for now 7 years.

Say I go back and end up marrying a girl who is close to my age not that I will have too much to say in the matter lol but lets just assume I do. I know I will get marry once and I will stick in all they to the end. I am a survivor.

I will miss this... but if I do give it a shot it might work it might not work!

What you said about Change is correct I believe that.

Ouch !!

Arranged marriage....I am in USA for now 7 years.

say I go back and end up marrying a girl who is close to my age not that I will have too much to say in the matter lol but lets just assume I do. I know I will get marry once and I will stick in all they to the end. I am a survivor.

I will miss this....but if I do give it a shot it might work it might not work!!

What you said about Change is correct I believe that.Ok that tells me a lot that you are from an arrainged marriage culture. THat can explain your dating problems as you never learned to rules and techniques involved in dating.

Being with a woman that is closer to your age will likely cause less stress. Oh you will still have stress and issues as all couples will have... but you won't be dealing with the irrational behaviour that goes with immaturity as well.

I think you are attracted to teenagers because you and a younger woman are on the same emotional and experiential level. It makes sense to me that, in effect, you are equals of sorts in that respect.

Speaking from American culture, I would consider you immature and frightened of mature hetero sexuality at your age 28.

I really can't speak for Islamic culture, or other non-Western cultures.

Best wishes to you, :)

Okay same level sexually speaking. ONLY

I am not immature, and that is why I do get hints from older women... and that I do in fact some people I used to work with thought I liked older women and laughed at me.


Please keep the culture+Religion+Country out... I am trying to think independently

I have tried talking to few gals and it always turns out wrong the person is already taken. I just don't go after a girl who is in a relation ship. Wrecking a house is a terrible thing to me.

All these thing add up and that is why I am more attracted to some one younger physically & Mentally.

I keep on saying fresh, no offense intended there; short of expressions.

Ouch !!

Arranged marriage....I am in USA for now 7 years.

say I go back and end up marrying a girl who is close to my age not that I will have too much to say in the matter lol but lets just assume I do. I know I will get marry once and I will stick in all they to the end. I am a survivor.

I will miss this....but if I do give it a shot it might work it might not work!!

What you said about Change is correct I believe that.


Well, I think you willl find you get a lot less stress from a woman closer to your own age... There are generational differences that WILL result in conflict at some point. Many of these are due to imaturity ( many young people think they know all the answers) and as you get older the more you understand what you really know and can do.

Many guys go through a "Mid-life Crisis" that is much the same in their late 30's to early 40's... they act and do things that they are too old to be doing... sometimes youger women are involved and marriages and families get destroyed over soemthing they will later see for what it was stupid imature stuff.

Don't think you can go back or be young again... you can't and the older you get and try the more obvious it is.

I can't comment on the arrianged marriage thing... I never really understood how people ever agree to that but then I wasn't raised in that culture. I do know several people that were however. And quite honestly I've seen people that would have been better off having their parents pick their spouse than the one they ended up picking for themselves.

First of all, if you are constantly running into woman already in a relationship, then you are not going to the right places. There are loads of venues available to meet with woman who are looking for relationships.

And the problem with trying to establish a relationship with someone immature is that they don't last. Someone needs a level of maturity to enter a long term relationship.

First of all, if you are constantly running into woman already in a relationship, then you are not going to the right places. There are loads of venues available to meet with woman who are looking for relationships.

And the problem with trying to establish a relationship with someone immature is that they don't last. Someone needs a level of maturity to enter a long term relationship.

I am willing to take the risk. You are right about going out part.

Thanks for the post

I am willing to take the risk. U r right about going out part.

Thanks for the post

But its not only your risk.

P.S. This is not a chat room or text messaging. Please do not you textspeak here.

N, You don't seem to understand that people begin to experiment with their sexuality when they are around 12-13 which is normal. Kissing and holding hands, making relationships.

At age 28, you are way behind socially and sexually, but for some reason, you don't want to think that about yourself, so you will languish in a fantasy world, a safe world. No fear associated with real female interaction.

Time to talk to a professional who can help you understand yourself and your fears. :)

Don't waste time because you are afraid of a blow to your ego.

Best wishes, :)

Y
1. Until you start dating and experience a relationship (not necessarily sexual) with a variety of woman, then what you are after is a fantasy you have built up in YOUR mind. And yes that is where counseling WILL help you.

2. As for the virgin thing, Asking gave a good answer. With the blind leading the blind you have a recipe for disaster. This is not a "good start" but a bad one. You may find it takes a long time to get it good, if ever.

1. Okay I want to date and experience a relationship, but with a virgin and a young girl that is all I want

2. Geez its not a rocket science I am after. Its all natural. Sex; it can't be that hard. It will be pure natural experience. And it will only get better like you said.

Thank you for responding.

1. Okay I want to date and experience a relationship, but with a virgin and a young girl that is all I want

2. Geez its not a rocket science I am after. Its all natural. Sex; it can't be that hard. It will be pure natural experience. and it will only get better like you said.

Thank you for responding.YOu are assuming you will find a virgin... that wants only an older man. And you aren't even open to anything else...

Nothing natural or pure about that unless you were a young man as well.

Natural is usually with people your same age group. Look only for an 18-20m year old virgin you are likely to find yourself a 60 year old single man, your whole life wasted looking for one thing you couldn't have. And the older you get the less likely you will ever find that as well.

Quite honestly you stand a better chance of your family finding a young spouse for you in your home country than you are waiting for something that only a small portion of women, much less virgin women want.

What I mean to say if you are waiting for a young virgin that's looking for a much older man to lose her virginity to, then you are likely to be waiting a very long time.

Well, I think you willl find you get a lot less stress from a woman closer to your own age....There are generational differences that WILL result in conflict at some point. Many of these are due to imaturity ( many young people think they know all the answers) and as you get older the more you understand what you really know and can do.

Many guys go through a "Mid-life Crisis" that is much the same in their late 30's to early 40's....they act and do things that they are too old to be doing....sometimes youger women are involved and marriages adn families get destroyed over soemthing they will later see for what it was stupid imature stuff.

Don't think you can go back or be young again....you can't and the older you get and try the more obvious it is.

I can't comment on the arrianged marriage thing....I never really understood how people ever agree to that but then I wasn't raised in that culture. I do know several people that were however. And quite honestly I've seen people that would have been better off having their parents pick their spouse than the one they ended up picking for themself.

Okay I get the part where they are immature and probably we will not get old together.
All that is not written in stone.

Its like I am bore. I am not rich or any thing... actually lucky to have a job in the economy. But, I want some spice and maybe some of my own fantasies to come true. I am guilty of that. But it's the experience I want. To be able to enjoy myself with extremely young silly gal who has not set her foot in the world of Sex just like I have not.

I don't know what's in store for me. The way I am going if I don't get arrange marriage I'll die alone and people won't even know... well perhaps the stink/odor of my body rottening will make them break whole and carry to the grave.

See... the problem I see here is that you are looking for a girl that will last "for now" until you go back to your homeland and enter an arranged marriage.

Sorry--don't know many virgins in the US that aren't looking for a permanent relationship to give their virginity to.

You are looking for the impossible. Not just improbable, but impossible. If you are not looking for a MARRIAGE partner, then what is the point of dating? Yes, it's fun--but someone is going to get hurt if you go in with less than honorable intentions.

You want a sex only relationship, or one that is "no strings attached" then find a prostitute.

Okay I get the part where they are immature and probably we will not get old together.
All that is not written in stone.

Its like I am bore. I am not rich or any thing....actually lucky to have a job in the economy. But, i want some spice and maybe some of my own fantasies to come true. I am guilty of that. But its the experience I want. To be able to enjoy myself with extremely young silly gal who has not set her foot in the world of Sex just like I have not.

I dunno whats in store for me. The way I am going if I don't get arrange marriage I'll die alone and people wont even know...well perhaps the stink/odor of my body rottening will make them break whole and carry to the grave.


That is basically not a realistic expectation. In fact that is the LEAST likely thing you will find. Like Synnen has said above. Women just are not saving their virginity to give up for an older guy that's got no intentions of marrying them and might in fact get married to someone else.

Want a youg woman with no strings... there are escorts... they are the furthest thing from virgins, and as long as you are clean and have money they don't expect anything from you but respect. But they can be young and you can have sex.

You can wait, and wait and wait, because you only want what you want and nothing else and find yourself a much, MUCH single older man one day and you see the opportunities you have missed when its too late.

YOu are assuming you will find a virgin...that wants only an older man. And you aren't even open to anything else...

Nothing natural or pure about that unless you were a young man as well.

Natural is usually with people your same age group. Look only for an 18-20m year old virgin you are likely to find yourself a 60 year old single man, your whole life wasted looking for one thing you couldn't have. And the older you get the less likely you will ever find that as well.

Quite honestly you stand a better chance of your family finding a young spouse for you in your home country than you are waiting for something that only a small portion of women, much less virgin women want.

What I mean to say if you are waiting for a young virgin thats looking for a much older man to lose her virginity to, then you are likely to be waiting a very long time.

Oh God!!
I am Beat... may be when I am old I could use my retirement fund to a good use lol
You keep throwing the ugly reality at me.

I am not incapable of achieving this on my own. It can be done. Might have to save the virgin part for after retirement. All the gals I talk to they lost there's around 14 or 15. And that's simply WRONG.

Lol

I though this might have helped but I am actually getting sad.


Thanks for honest responses though

Oh God !!!
I am Beat.....may be when i am old I could use my retirement fund to a good use lol
you keep throwing the ugly reality at me.

I am not incapable of achieving this on my own. It can be done. Might have to save the virgin part for after retirement. All the gals I talk to they lost there's around 14 or 15. And that's simply WRONG.

lol

I though this might have helped but I am actually getting sad.


Thanks for honest responses thoughWe are just trying to point out what is an unrealistic expectation... There are plenty of women out there in the world, not all are married... and most of them are not young virgins... limiting yourself to the one thing that's not likely is a bad way to view life.


A healthy approach it looking at all available women equally that are in the right age range... they might not be virgins but if you don't open your eyes you won't see them.

Really, n, talk to a professional. You will feel better and more clear-headed about you situation at age 28. :)

Best wishes,

As you have found out for yourself, someone who is still a virgin at age 18 is a rarity. And any that have committed to maintaining that status this long is not likely to be someone looking to give it up to a dating partner.

But you seem to be missing the main point here. That you have widely unrealistic expectation. You have a fantasy. The odds are you are not going to find someone to share this fantasy with you. And the longer you stick to this fantasy, the more you are depriving yourself.

Doesn't the fact that just about EVERYONE responding to your post has told you the same thing tell you something?

I agree with the others. If you let go of the idea of "getting" your fantasy virgin and instead starting looking for love with a real person, whose status isn't important, you have NO reason to be sad. You are at a great age to meet someone wonderful.

I think counseling would be a good idea, too. You are stuck on an idea that is holding you back from a major part of your life.

As you have found out for yourself, someone who is still a virgin at age 18 is a rarity.

Scott,
Just in the interests of truth and accuracy, 18 year old women who have never had sex are not rare.

I don't know what the current numbers are, but as of 1995, about 50% of 19 year old women had never had sex.

N C H S - 1997 News Release - Teen Sex Down, New Study Shows (http://www.cdc.gov/nchs/pressroom/97news/nsfgteen.htm)

The 1995 National Survey of Family Growth, conducted by HHS' National Center for Health Statistics, found that 50 percent of women 15-19 years of age had ever had intercourse, the first decline ever recorded by the periodic survey. The survey previously found that 55 percent of 15-19 year old women had ever had intercourse in 1990, reflecting a steady increase from 53 percent in 1988 and 47 percent in 1982. Earlier surveys found the percentage to be 36 percent in 1975 and 29 percent in 1970.

For 2006, the numbers are:
"53% of girls 15 to 19 and 49% of boys reported that they had had intercourse."
Study Suggests Shift in Teen Sex Practices - Los Angeles Times (http://articles.latimes.com/2005/sep/16/science/sci-oralsex16)

One reason that more girls than boys have had intercourse is that older men are more likely to seek them out. All the same, as you can see, 47% of 19 year old women have never had intercourse. That's a lot of virgins.

See....the problem I see here is that you are looking for a girl that will last "for now" until you go back to your homeland and enter an arranged marriage.

Sorry--don't know many virgins in the US that aren't looking for a permanent relationship to give their virginity to.

You are looking for the impossible. Not just improbable, but impossible. If you are not looking for a MARRIAGE partner, then what is the point of dating? Yes, it's fun--but someone is going to get hurt if you go in with less than honorable intentions.

You want a sex only relationship, or one that is "no strings attached" then find a prostitute.

No No NO

I never said that. There are plenty of people in my family who have married gals from other countries.

I don't have bad intentions!!


I respect women... I have met some amazing gals here in USA and who are hot and I made a move as well. It just so happen that they are taken. Lol

Like I said and some other dude as well Dating is the beginning. I never said I have a year to satisfy my fantasy!

I want to say if my fantasy is fulfilled and it clicks I would be honored to spend my whole life with that one girl. And tell me grand kids one day that I fell in love with this amazingly young girl nothing like me and she and I've done all these crazy thing & are going to die together. 1 person for the whole life. I already said If I get married I'll never be able to get out of that...

I can't believe you brought Prostitute in this discussion... Land of the free wasn't quite free for me and now all of a sudden fantasies are also getting sanctions!

Tch Tch Tch


I apologise if I have frustrated you in any way.

Scott,
Just in the interests of truth and accuracy, 18 year old women who have never had sex are not rare.

I don't know what the current numbers are, but as of 1995, about 50% of 19 year old women had never had sex.

N C H S - 1997 News Release - Teen Sex Down, New Study Shows (http://www.cdc.gov/nchs/pressroom/97news/nsfgteen.htm)


For 2006, the numbers are:
"53% of girls 15 to 19 and 49% of boys reported that they had had intercourse."
Study Suggests Shift in Teen Sex Practices - Los Angeles Times (http://articles.latimes.com/2005/sep/16/science/sci-oralsex16)

One reason that more girls than boys have had intercourse is that older men are more likely to seek them out. All the same, as you can see, 47% of 19 year old women have never had intercourse. That's a lot of virgins.


Hmm I wouldn't have put it that high. Last I remember seeing some numbers there were under 40%. I do remember reading that the numbers seem to have bottomed out and Teen sex is back on the rise.

But be that as it may, I still think anyone still a virgin in that age bracket is more than likely to be consciously saving themselves for a life partner.

We are just trying to point out what is an unrealistic expectation..... There are plenty of women out there in the world, not all are married....and most of them are not young virgins....limiting yourself to the one thing thats not likely is a bad way to view life.


A healthy approach it looking at all available women equally that are in the right age range.....they might not be virgins but if you don't open your eyes you won't see them.

U said right range!!

Geez my first post mentioned the girl I really really liked... I would marry her even now with eye shut. She is amazing... guess what she is dating someone almost 20 yr older than her.

There is no right range... I think

Part of my problem is when a girl come up to me and say You look nice today XXXXX, I don't know what to say back. Or some one come might close and smells me and tell me that they like my cologne I tell them its XXX you should buy that for your BF.
Lol

All I am getting from you guys is open your eyes, go to counselor (u r sick), the world is ugly, young gals are not good, I am sick in head bla bla bla

U said right range !!!

Geez my first post mentioned the girl i really really liked...I would marry her even now with eye shut. She is amazing....guess what she is dating someone almost 20 yr older than her.

There is no right range...I think

Part of my problem is when a girl come up to me and say You look nice today XXXXX, I don't know what to say back. Or some one come might close and smells me and tell me that they like my cologne I tell them its XXX you should buy that for ur BF.
lol

All I am getting from u guys is open your eyes, go to counselor (u r sick), the world is ugly, young gals are not good, I am sick in head bla bla bla

What is textspeak!!

Using "u" instead of "You" and "r" instead of "are" is textspeak.

Please use proper English.

I think that this all has stemmed from your own insecurities. First you are putting unrealistic expections on who you will date - your virgin fantasy... Second you would instantly marry a woman who is already spoken for (That is unless she was single, then no doubt you would find some flaw that made her not compatible with you either, like say the fact she is NOT a virgin).

How do you know that even if you found that rare virgin who is 19ish that everything else that makes a marriage successful would fall into place? What if she didn't want to date you strictly from the insult of fitting your dating "bill"?

You have to date women for who they are and what you like about them, not for their situation.

And I can't do that. That is so dumb.
Laughing out loudly

Well good luck to you, hopefully you will not be back questioning why you are forty still an unmarried virgin.

When you set your expectations TOO high, you are set for a HUGE letdown.

I think that this all has stemmed from your own insecurities. First you are putting unrealistic expections on who you will date - your virgin fantasy... Second you would instantly marry a woman who is already spoken for (That is unless she was single, then no doubt you would find some flaw that made her not compatible with you either, like say the fact she is NOT a virgin).

How do you know that even if you found that rare virgin who is 19ish that everything else that makes a marriage successful would fall into place? What if she didn't want to date you strictly from the insult of fitting your dating "bill"?

You have to date women for who they are and what you like about them, not for their situation.

Thank you for your kind words!

I am not insecure... having a fantasy makes you insecure. That's new for me.
I know I am asking for a lot here!

That women I said I would marry eyes shut... I was her friend(for my part) for three years... then I find out she broke up... with in a week she announced she is dating a guy like 20 years older than her. I never had a chance. Perhaps I am out of my league... If she can why can't I?? It's a little different scenario.

I wouldn't know if I have found the women I want even if she was 19ish+virgin... there is no guarantee there.
But at least one wish will be fulfilled... I wouldn't want to date any one who thinks its an insult to fit my dream girl.

If I date I will date women for who they are. I just want to find the Diamond... and give her every thing I have. If it doesn't work out that is another story.

Keep Going People I need this straighten out!

Thanks for your support

Nostradamus,
I have to tell you that the people here disagree on LOT of things. The fact that we are pretty much all agreeing that you should (1)
date women (2)
in their 20s who are (3)
not necessarily virgins should tell you something.

Who knows? You may get lucky and find a virgin. But if you go around trying to figure out if women are virgins before you'll even ask them out to a movie, you aren't going to get to even having a relationship.

Nostradamus,
I have to tell you that the people here disagree on LOT of things. The fact that we are pretty much all agreeing that you should (1) women (2) who are (3) should tell you something.

Who knows? You may get lucky and find a virgin. But if you go around trying to figure out if women are virgins before you'll even ask them out to a movie, you aren't going to get to even having a relationship.

And Thank you every one, here is what I want.
1. Date: sure why, having said that I am a virgin who has never even kissed a girl. Its going to be a challenge in it self.
2. Who are age range 18-22
3. If virgin Might ignore lot of other things, if not a virgin than I don't know has to be a love at first sight. Or something.

I admit I can't get pass the idea that I might have to kiss a girl who has been sucking penises since she was 15. That just is sickening, hence the virgin preference.

Crap
I am going to die alone!!

See---THAT is your issue.

We ALL, every last one of us, has things in our past that should STAY in the past.

If you can't get over the fact that a girl has a life BEFORE you came into it, then you have bigger issues.

Virgins are hard to find. Out of everyone I personally know I only have one virgin friend who is 33 years old.

I know this might be out topic but I found this interesting. Nowadays with modern technology you have virgins selling their virginity to the highest buyer because their no longer waiting for love but want the money. Here are some females doing this as we speak, you can read it if you want and Google more too. I just found it interesting. www.thefrisky.com/post/246-virgins-for-sale

U said right range !!!

Geez my first post mentioned the girl i really really liked...I would marry her even now with eye shut. She is amazing....guess what she is dating someone almost 20 yr older than her.

There is no right range...I think

Part of my problem is when a girl come up to me and say You look nice today XXXXX, I don't know what to say back. Or some one come might close and smells me and tell me that they like my cologne I tell them its XXX you should buy that for ur BF.
lol

All I am getting from u guys is open your eyes, go to counselor (u r sick), the world is ugly, young gals are not good, I am sick in head bla bla blaNo you are simply misunderstanding what we are trying to tell you...

From what you are telling us we see a man who is interested ONLY in 18-20 year old virgins... and appears unwilling to even consider an older or non-virgin woman.

We base our advice on what you say here in this thread. None of us know you personally.

Can it work with a big age gap? Yes, but its far more likely to be the source of problems. Maybe not at first but over time it will. Early into a relationship everyone behaves like they expect the other person wants... stay together for a long time or get married people stop doing that, start doing what they want and the problems start.

The part where you don't know what to do if a woman comes up to you for the above mentioned reasons...

First thing to do is not assume they are being anything but friendly... in most cases that's all it is. Be friendly in return, thank them for any compliments and be nice. Don't assume they are interested or anything... if they are by any chance interested they will continue the conversation, THere are a lot of body language cues that can tell if she appears interested at first but they are beyond what can be discussed simply in a thread. Women can see desperation and it will send them running... away from you.

Rule #1 is talk to them like you would your mom or sister... not a potiential wife.

Rule #2. Don't plan your life out in your head with someone you have only just met or worse haven't even spoken to yet.

Rule #3. Even if they are interested they are human too. And just as likely to be nervous.

Rule #4. First impressions usually make or break any chances you have to date them.

You can't always get what you want and you won't always find what your looking for. So what do you do when this happens? Change your standards and be more open and focus of other aspects of a woman. Don't you want someone you can laugh and enjoy life with? Someone that is motivated, respect themselves and others? Someone who isn't going use you and who you can build something with? And the list is endless.

As long as you keep focusing on one thing your miss out on a lot. Start socializing. Do some speed dating, go to a single mixer, you can find single females where you least expect it. Or the new way to meet someone is over the internet on websites such as match.com, eharmony, to name a few. Get out and mangle.

You can't always get what you want and you won't always find what your looking for. So what do you do when this happens? Change your standards and be more open and focus of other aspects of a woman. Don't you want someone you can laugh and enjoy life with? Someone that is motivated, respect themselves and others? Someone who isn't going use you and who you can build something with? And the list is endless.

As long as you keep focusing on one thing your miss out on alot. Start socializing. Do some speed dating, go to a single mixer, you can find single females where you least expect it. Or the new way to meet someone is over the internet on websites such as match.com, eharmony, to name a few. Get out and mangle.

Thanks Liz.
It is true. In the big picture I am missing a lot. But, its just so hard.

It feels like every one is telling me to give up.
Accept, that I am defeated!

I am not going to get what I want...

Okay, one more thing its not like I walk up to gals and my first question is Are you a virgin??

I don' do that, that's just disgusting and being a pervert.

But the fear of knowing that she(them) is not keeps me away.

Okay, one more thing its not like I walk up to gals and my first question is Are you a virgin???

I don' do that, that's just disgusting and being a pervert.

But the fear of knowing that she(them) is not keeps me away.

See now that is part of what we are talking about... and why it would be good to see a counciler. That's not a normal thought or fear to be focusing on. If they can help you overcome that problem some of your other ones might take care of themselves and go away.

Well let me start by saying... you sound pretty damn creepy. Now maybe you're "behind"... perhaps... "blooming a little late" and you want a younger girl because you feel "more cool" around someone so young and immature. BUT that's just it.. your 28... why do you want to date a child... that's just creepy!