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View Full Version : Visitation rights in an abusive situation


Bright_Eyez3
Jan 2, 2009, 06:18 AM
I was married to an abusive man, we separated when our son was three weeks old and divorced a few months later. My ex-husband has a long history of mental illness and is a drug addict. My ex-husband is currently in prison for agravated assault with a deadly weapon (He stabbed a woman in the throat) My son hasn't seen his father since he was 15 months old, but I have done my best to keep him involved with his father's parents and other family, so that my son will know his family. My custody agreement has myself as the sole legal and physical guardian of our son, and visitation is only at the mutual agreement of both my ex and myself. My question is this, how hard would it be for me to deny my ex husband visitation? We live in Texas and I am terrified of my son going to see his father. The man is manipulative, emotionally abusive, and violent. He is always strung out on something. He is a pathological liar with a history of bi-polar. I know, there was a time when I loved him and trusted him, but my feelings were misplaced, he was never what he appeared to be. I don't wish to deny him visitation out of bitterness, only because I fear for the safety of our son. I know people can change, but he hasn't yet, nor does he express any desire to. Should I just wait and see what he does, or should I get a lawyer now? He never expresses any interest in our son, except to try and manipulate me. Ah, I am rambling, I am sorry, but if I could get some advice, on the difficulty of keeping him away from our son with the custody agreement we have now and if I should get a lawyer and try to alter the custody agreement to make it more difficult to see his son or if I should wait and see what he does, I would be very grateful. Thanks so much.

JudyKayTee
Jan 2, 2009, 07:23 AM
I was married to an abusive man, we seperated when our son was three weeks old and divorced a few months later. My ex-husband has a long history of mental illness and is a drug addict. My ex-husband is currently in prison for agravated assault with a deadly weapon (He stabbed a woman in the throat) My son hasn't seen his father since he was 15 months old, but I have done my best to keep him involved with his father's parents and other family, so that my son will know his family. My custody agreement has myself as the sole legal and physical guardian of our son, and visitation is only at the mutual agreement of both my ex and myself. My question is this, how hard would it be for me to deny my ex husband visitation? We live in Texas and I am terrified of my son going to see his father. The man is manipulative, emotionally abusive, and violent. He is always strung out on something. He is a pathological liar with a history of bi-polar. I know, there was a time when I loved him and trusted him, but my feelings were misplaced, he was never what he appeared to be. I don't wish to deny him visitation out of bitterness, only because I fear for the safety of our son. I know people can change, but he hasn't yet, nor does he express any desire to. Should I just wait and see what he does, or should I get a lawyer now? He never expresses any interest in our son, except to try and manipulate me. Ah, I am rambling, I am sorry, but if I could get some advice, on the difficulty of keeping him away from our son with the custody agreement we have now and if I should get a lawyer and try to alter the custody agreement to make it more difficult to see his son or if I should wait and see what he does, I would be very grateful. Thanks so much.



You have to go back to Court and get a change in custody and visitation - you would have to present evidence that the father is a danger to the child, emotionally or physically. The Court will make a determination of what best suits the needs of the child.

You can also request that all visitation by supervised by a third party.

ScottGem
Jan 2, 2009, 08:25 AM
If the court order says that visitation is only at the MUTUAL agreement of you and your ex, then you can deny him visitation. But since you want to allow contact with his family, I might suggest that you allow it only through the supervision of your in-laws.

If you refuse any visitation, then his only recourse is to go back to court to change the visitation order. You can then present your evidence that he is a danger to the child so you don't want visitation for him.

Not sure how the court will see it, but with his criminal record I don't see him getting any more than supervised visits.