Hello Everybody,

I am Meiri from Brazil. I used to leave in the US. Married to a Purto Rican guy and we just got divorce. My heart is broken because my ex-husband is dating online a girl from Russia and he is bring her to US by Christmas. It is not easy feeling to see all this happening. I am back to my country now.:)

My ex is dating a Russian woman online. He is bring her for Christmas. Even thought they not meet each other yet they are talking seriouly about marriage. He is 67 years old and she is 40. She is telling him she loves her and he is doing the same. How this can happen?

Easy.
Either they do love each other or they love who they imagine each other to be. Only time will tell.

Things happen Meiri.
We have to move on.I know its difficult to handle break offs and divorces.Its tougher in the starting but as you know,time is the best healer.

So try to forgot those days and hope for a better future.
Develop habbits like reading to help you in coming out of the situation.Hang out with your friends.
He has a girlfriend online,then what?since you two are separated,there is no control over his activities.and you can make friends too online.
I am not talking about making bfs but there are lots of good people on the net that can be good friends.You can share your feelings with them until you get better.

Life will move for sure and so you should.

All The Best.

I forgot to mention... that they have been talking each other last the 2 months

So it is your ex, why do you care, as your ex, it is really none of your business.

But often things are so bad in some nations, women will do anything to get out, and getting married to someone who will take care of them here, is a lot better than life there. Really not uncommon at all.

Greetings and WELCOME to the site, meiri! I noticed that you've already posted about your dilemma over in Relationships. That's good, because Introductions isn't where we address issues here.

Thanks!

I know it is none of my business. But I still care for him.

Nothing you can do without seeming like a meddling hurt ex.

Things happen Meiri.
We have to move on.I know its difficult to handle break offs and divorces.Its tougher in the starting but as you know,time is the best healer.

So try to forgot those days and hope for a better future.
Develop habbits like reading to help you in coming out of the situation.Hang out with your friends.
He has a girlfriend online,then what?since you two are separated,there is no control over his activities.and you can make friends too online.
I am not talking about making bfs but there are lots of good people on the net that can be good friends.You can share your feelings with them until you get better.

Life will move for sure and so you should.

All The Best

Do you honestly think this relationship will work after two months? I don't think so! Lay low now, and do nothing. She is looking for a free ride.. nothing else. It's kind of like a mail order bride. Sounds crazy too me..

My ex-husband is a smart and secure money kind of man. So I am wondering what make him fall for this Russian woman so fast.

Often people who talk over the internet make themselves appear different than maybe what they are (put their best foot forward)
Then the person they are talking with builds an idealistic image of who they believe the person is.
Only time will tell. She could be a gold digger, she could be looking for a better life, she could be sincere. It is up to your friend to determine in the end.

Attraction is a thing that can happen to anyone.
Sometimes it's the lonliness and sometimes its just the frustration that eases off when you talk to a person.

You see what happens is when you have a new friend,things appear to go very well,and especially with online friends.
Its different to talk to a person on internet and face to face.
U see marriage is not possible because when you live with a person,many things matters like d way of living,the hygine maintained and etc etc.
So Don't worry,things like this are very uncommon and least probable to happen and end well.

Have no idea what Rohin is saying but marriage is possible between any couple that wants to marry but them marrying is putting the cart before the horse when they haven't even gotten to meet each other and know each other in person.

Mieri, I am sorry for you. I thought it was an ex-boyfriend, not your husband. I know it hurts. But think its his lost. He lost a good women. Don't beat yourself up. How long were you married and you have children?

How long has he been your ex husband?
What kind of relationship do you have now?
I take it he tells you everything and sees you at least as a best friend or close?

I was married for 9 years. We do not have kids. After the divorce I return to Brazil where my family lives. I have been here for 03 months. Up to the begin of this month we use to contact each other by email. In his last email he told me that he decided not to keep in touch with me anymore because he'd found a woman in his life and he was very happy with her. A common friend told me that woman is someone he just met online, that she is from Russia, that she is in love with him, that he sent her a ticket to her to fly to US to spend christmas with him. And what is worst that is going to marry her.

Your ex-husband is 67 years old so he is capable of making his own mistakes. Sometimes you have to live and learn and some learn the hard way. Who knows what will happen between him and her but whatever happens is between them two.

Are you going be at the Christmas party that he's bringing her too? If so, this might give you the chance to met her along with everyone else.

Nowadays, people are meeting people from the over the internet and supposely fall in love but everyone knows that you have to physically know the person before you can do so. When people meet people over the net they get emotionally attach to that person and confuse it with love. But again, he is a big boy that is capable of making his own choices so for the time being you need to step aside because no matter what you say to him, it will fall on deaf ears.

If he is happy so should you be. Weird as it sounds... nevermind!

I wish I was happy for him, but there is so many scam over that issue... And at same time I am going to be honest I am so sad with the possibility not have a change to have him back anymore.

He will have to figure out for himself when he actually meets her.
Once they meet they may even find out they don't want to have any relationship. She may be sincere and not scamming. More often than not when someone is pulling a scam they want a lot more than a plane ticket up front.
If he decides to go through with marrying her there really isn't anything you can do or say.

You are the most important person do not degrade yourself no one should be able to hurt you. Love yourself you are special and the most important person for yourself

After a divorce it is hard, but you have to work at moving on with your life, in fact unless you have childrend together where you have to deal with a EX, you should not even worry or know what he is doing, no contact with ex at all is the best

Trust that someone has your best interest at hand.be thankful he left and you move on.

Updated news...
I know it is none of my business but my ex-husband already has sent $2,400.00 to his Russian online dating woman in order to bring her to US. As I said they have been emailing each other for less of 2 months. I have a feeling that she is a scam. But this is not important to me anymore, what really is making me feel sad is that HE IS NOT A MAN I WAS THINKING HE WAS. I saw her picture, she looks cheap, she is so young that she looks like his daughter. I see him now as a dirty old man. I have lost all respect for him. About myself, I feel that 9 years that I spent beside him were lost time. Someone could help me with a good advice on how to keep going on with my life and stop carrying this bad feeling. Thanks.

Updated news ....
I know it is none of my business but my ex-husband already has sent $2,400.00 to his Russian online dating woman in order to bring her to US. As I said they have been emailing each other for less of 2 months. I have a feeling that she is a scam. But this is not important to me anymore, what really is making me feel sad is that HE IS NOT A MAN I WAS THINKING HE WAS. I saw her picture, she looks cheap, she is so young that she looks like his daughter. I see him now as a dirty old man. I have lost all respect for him. About myself, I feel that 9 years that I spent beside him were lost time. Someone could help me with a good advice on how to keep going on with my life and stop carrying this bad feeling. Thanks.

Let me tell you a little story about a co-worker who was very much like your husband. He brought a bride to the US from Russia, she was gorgeous, young and smart. They were married for a couple years and she became a US citizen. During this time he sent LOTS of money to her family in Russia. He told me he had sent more than $50,000 in two years. Well this woman started claiming he was beating her and she wanted a divorce on those grounds. She found a very good lawyer to work on her divorce for free and she told her husband she would drop the abuse allegation if he would grant the divorce and send $50,000 more to her family in Russia. He said he couldn't afford a lawyer good enough to fight hers and he finally realized she had just used him to get to the US and gain her citizenship. I don't know what happened because he quit his job a few days after telling me about this.

For you I say just let it go, things will happen as they are meant to. It's time to move on and be happy, I'm sure you learned many things in those 9 years that you would not have known unless you were in that relationship. Those years are not lost time, they have been part of the experience that makes you who you are. You control your own destiny, if you sit around and be sad then you will lead a sad existence. Get out there and make your life what you want it to be!
Ber

He is 67 years old and she is 40. How this can happen?Hello m:

Uhhhh, seems pretty obvious to me... Sure, it might be a scam... Meeting a chick in your local bar might be a scam too.

But, I don't know of any bars where a 67 year old can pick up any chicks...

excon

Please don't beat yourself up on this ex-husband Meri, you are worth more than that. Evidently the man you married isn't the same person, and this is the real him.. You should be thankful, right now its hard to see what he has done to you and all the hurt he has inflicted on to you. But believe me in a year from now you will be thinking he did you a favor. YOU DON"T NEED HIM, HE ISN"T WORTH IT. Let him fail and make his own mistakes.. Have respect for yourself.. and try and meet new friends, as hard as it may sound. I was married in 2001, thought I met the most wonderful person in the world. Never a harsh word, showered me with gifts. We actually hit it off wonderfully. I got married 6 months later, he wasn't the person I had met.. He was an acoholic, and never knew it.. He never abused me or anything.. IT hurt like heck.. and to this day it still does.. because I thought he was going to be my soulmate.. and he has his work, close by to me.. and every time I drive by I feel awful.. so it hurts.. only a few blocks away.. so I can run into him all the time.. We are civil to each other.. and to this day I know he regrets everything and if fine today, but now its all too late.. So keep your chin and don't look behind.. meet new friends and try to forget.