What should I do when ex shows his butt while he is picking up his child for visitation?

Umm, more info is necessary for a decent answer.

I just got a divorce and I had to give visation. It reads that visation does not start till the child is in counseling and the relationship is restored. And its not. The child has no plans on it. And he thinks just after 3 days that he is going to come to my house and do what he wants. I don't want the child to deal with how he acts. She is 13

3 days is not enough time in counseling for the relationship to be restored.

Why does the child have no plans of restoring the relationship. What part of your story is missing here?

Ok, you have to do what the court order says, but then so does the child an so does the man. They have to go to counseling, after a while, if the current order says they have to finish, he can refile to force visits.

But basically if he has not reason to be at your home, just don't let him in