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Deya5555
Oct 21, 2008, 01:09 PM
I broke up with my Ex two month ago after 9 years living together,it was me who kick him out because he had come home @2:00am,Next day I told him to get everything out and leave,How after 2month I regret what I did,I confirm that he was'nt cheating so that was good,he never had.But know after 2 month I started to talk to him,he came over last Friday and this past Sunday but he did not stay,we made love both time's and we even went out to eat dinner,what I don't understand is why when I call him from my personnal cell he does not answer, but when I *67 he does answer and talks to me likes nothing is wrong.I gave him the key to the house.I just don't know if he is coming back,he saids he can't leave where he is staying,which is with his nephew and a co-worker because when they get loud with music and stuff he has to put order.I just don't know what to do and why he is different when he's around me and when he leaves he does not answer my calls or Text.

JBeaucaire
Oct 21, 2008, 01:55 PM
Stop dating him thinking he's the guy who used to live with you. Stop trying to get that guy back. Just date the guy he is today, from where he lives. Treat it normal, like you would anyone.

Accept what he says to be true, you already know you're way more stressed out than he is. Remember that.

You two can "court" each other just fine from separate homes. In fact, it's the preferred method. Now when you get really obnoxiously angry about something he didn't do, he doesn't have to move out, he already has privacy and can just retreat to it.

Just relax. Don't make this into more than it is, just go back to dating like normal people.

chuff
Oct 21, 2008, 05:00 PM
I have to tell you if I invested 9 years with someone and they accused me of cheating when I wasn't and threw me out with no notice I think I'd be pretty PO'ed at the person. Then to have that person bascially act like everything is okay now that I've made false accusations and it's okay to move back in and be available at a moments notice for someone who did that... while I don't think I'd be jumping through hoops for that person.

You broke the relationship, you broke up with him, and you made false allegations on the way out. Now you expect him to be there for you? Something is certainly wrong with this picture, but it's not him. He gave 9 years and got nothing in return, so he's not excited to be getting in contact with you for no apparent reason. As JB stated you are now dating, and you need to keep it that way because you told him you didn't want him anymore, so why should he waste his time with someone who treats him like that? Maybe he will come aroung, but not through sex, you have to start over and date him until he can be comfortable with you again.

talaniman
Oct 23, 2008, 09:39 AM
You can't hit someone in the head with a brick, and expect love in return.

You should really learn to control those impulses, or be prepared for the consequences.

Best give him time for his head to heal, and then see if he is willing to take a chance, on you hitting him in his head again.

This is a good time to work on your own issues, which I suspect are bigger than his curfew violation.