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beautifullily
Sep 18, 2008, 01:47 AM
Let me start by saying that my father is indeed a Sociopath and I would like to know if anyone else out there have the same experience, because today I am hurting the people I love (not intentionally) because the way my father shaped me out to be. Well, I moved out of my parents house at age 17 because of the abuse (both physically and mentally). My dad would switch mood swings from yelling at me keeping me up to 4 in the moringin even though I had school the next day. He would talk to me in a crazy way to make me feel horrible and everyone should feel bad for him. It was all about ME ME ME to him. He would get frustrated if I didn't hug him after a fight, he would start slamming the doors and have a fit like a child. Why would I want to hug him after a useless fight? I found my dad going through my belongings when I was at school. He flipped out when he found a notebook of mine that said something about birth control, and he said "We are going to talk' which always meant trouble from him. It would be an argument that would last for hours. Eventually screwing me up in school I could not concentrate in school. I did not want to go home. My dad changed his work schedule to make sure he would be there before I did. He tried to control me. I could not even go outside the house without him thinking I was "going somewhere". It was so bad that my dad gave my a black eye and I went to school and the teacher knew something was wrong. My dad found out I was talking to the teacher and left work early and went to my school acting paranoid I would tell them he did that to me. I lied to my teacher and told him I got in a fight at school to protect my dad. I wish I hadn't lied.

The day I left his house was the day he told my mother to stop the car so he could kick my a**. My mom stopped the car and he threatened me to get out of the car to kick my a** . I of course stayed in the car. Waited to get in the house and I ran away that day and didn't go back. I ran to my friends house and he threatened my friend that he would call the police for kidnapping me. Even though, I ran away and my friend was just helping me. My dad says things to make people feel bad. What I cannot understand about this situation is that my mom and little sister witnessed a lot of these insane fights and arguments between me and my controlling father and they NEVER did anything to stop the fights. I would cry so much at night I was always stressing I dropped out of high school because I could not concentrate. We were fighting almost every night over something crazy he said and I would not agree. He had a problem with me eating a bowl of cereal at night. He was never appreciative of anything I did. He told me he wished I was dead and that he should've killed me. I got what he said on a voice recorder because my friend told me to bring it to use it in case my dad tried to get me to stay in his house. Till this day my dad never has apologized he thinks everything is OK and normal. Nothing is normal. I am picking up his crazy patterns, and I am already starting to mentally abuse people I love. Manipulation and the such. I cannot take this pattern anymore. And I am sad my dad would let this pass down to me. A lot of my friends think my dad is a sociopath the way he acts is insane. My dad actually put me in a mental hospital and told people I was crazy. Every time I called the police on him he was very good at manipulting them and the police did not believe me. My dad is controlling, when he can't control something he goes crazy. He said he can hit me if it's not with an closed fist. Things were horrible my whole life with him. Since I was little I can remember too much. I want to let this go and move on. I want to know if someone is going through a very similar situation to mine. I would love to know. Because as I was going through this I felt alone and confused because I knew what he did was wrong. I am glad though my friend helped me through it and I got away from my dad. I am now 20 and trying hard not to repeat this insane cycle. Thanks for reading.

justin17
Sep 18, 2008, 02:15 AM
My sistuation is quite close to this, my mom met my step dad and married him when I was 8, and one the first most violent memorys I had was when I was about 10 yrs old and it was snowing outside and I could hear him beating my mom and holding a pistol to her head threatening to kill her, he eventually passed out and we left but came back, why? I have no idea, he tends to get very violent and threatens people when they don't agree with his point of view, I'll walk by an he'll be doing something an he doesn't ask me to help he just goes on and completes his work then tells me how disrespectful and lazy I am because I didn't offer my help, he's unpredictable, he'll be fine one minute and going crazy the next, when he says "we need to talk" its just a forum for him to scream an act like anything but a grown man, I'm 18 now an still stay with him an my mom and while its never reached the horror it did on that night when I was 10 it still comes close nearly daily, so yeah your not the only one, I understand completely what your going through

beautifullily
Sep 18, 2008, 02:23 AM
Let me start off by saying that my father is indeed a Sociopath and I would like to know if anyone else out there have the same experience, because today I am hurting the people I love (not intentionally) because the way my father shaped me out to be. Well, I moved out of my parents house at age 17 because of the abuse (both physically and mentally). My dad would switch mood swings from yelling at me keeping me up to 4 in the moringin even though I had school the next day. He would talk to me in a crazy way to make me feel horrible and everyone should feel bad for him. It was all about ME ME ME to him. He would get frustrated if I didn't hug him after a fight, he would start slamming the doors and have a fit like a child. Why would I want to hug him after a useless fight? I found my dad going through my belongings when I was at school. He flipped out when he found a notebook of mine that said something about birth control, and he said "We are going to talk' which always meant trouble from him. It would be an argument that would last for hours. Eventually screwing me up in school I could not concentrate in school. I did not want to go home. My dad changed his work schedule to make sure he would be there before I did. He tried to control me. I could not even go outside the house without him thinking I was "going somewhere". It was so bad that my dad gave my a black eye and I went to school and the teacher knew something was wrong. My dad found out I was talking to the teacher and left work early and went to my school acting paranoid I would tell them he did that to me. I lied to my teacher and told him I got in a fight at school to protect my dad. I wish I hadn't lied.

The day I left his house was the day he told my mother to stop the car so he could kick my a**. My mom stopped the car and he threatened me to get out of the car to kick my a** . I of course stayed in the car. Waited to get in the house and I ran away that day and didn't go back. I ran to my friends house and he threatened my friend that he would call the police for kidnapping me. Even though, I ran away and my friend was just helping me. My dad says things to make people feel bad. What I cannot understand about this situation is that my mom and little sister witnessed alot of these insane fights and arguments between me and my controlling father and they NEVER did anything to stop the fights. I would cry so much at night I was always stressing I dropped out of high school because I could not concentrate. We were fighting almost every night over something crazy he said and I would not agree. He had a problem with me eating a bowl of cereal at night. He was never appreciative of anything I did. He told me he wished I was dead and that he should've killed me. I got what he said on a voice recorder because my friend told me to bring it to use it in case my dad tried to get me to stay in his house. Till this day my dad never has apologized he thinks everything is ok and normal. Nothing is normal. I am picking up his crazy patterns, and I am already starting to mentally abuse people I love. Manipulation and the such. I cannot take this pattern anymore. And I am sad my dad would let this pass down to me. Alot of my friends think my dad is a sociopath the way he acts is insane. My dad actually put me in a mental hospital and told people I was crazy. Everytime I called the police on him he was very good at manipulting them and the police did not believe me. My dad is controlling, when he can't control something he goes crazy. He said he can hit me if it's not with an closed fist. Things were horrible my whole life with him. Since I was little I can remember too much. I want to let this go and move on. I want to know if someone is going through a very similar situation to mine. I would love to know. Because as I was going through this I felt alone and confused because I knew what he did was wrong. I am glad though my friend helped me through it and I got away from my dad. I am now 20 and trying hard not to repeat this insane cycle. Thanks for reading.
Justin, I hope that you can get out of your situation and do not repeat the same cycle as your step father. I really did not realize I was repeating my dad's crazy cycle until my friend "woke me up" and showed me how many people I was hurting.

GothGirl1771
Sep 18, 2008, 10:37 AM
If you find yourself doing the same as you father, get some help. They say that what the parent does, the child will do in excess. Tell yourself you WILL NOT be like him. Decide to be as different as possible. If its hard, start little. Sometimes, pent up anger can cause this reaction. See a couselor. They can help you sort through the feelings and get you to normal. You can be different than him, you can have an awesome life, just tell yourself to change.
Good luck!

beautifullily
Sep 18, 2008, 02:44 PM
Let me start off by saying that my father is indeed a Sociopath and I would like to know if anyone else out there have the same experience, because today I am hurting the people I love (not intentionally) because the way my father shaped me out to be. Well, I moved out of my parents house at age 17 because of the abuse (both physically and mentally). My dad would switch mood swings from yelling at me keeping me up to 4 in the moringin even though I had school the next day. He would talk to me in a crazy way to make me feel horrible and everyone should feel bad for him. It was all about ME ME ME to him. He would get frustrated if I didn't hug him after a fight, he would start slamming the doors and have a fit like a child. Why would I want to hug him after a useless fight? I found my dad going through my belongings when I was at school. He flipped out when he found a notebook of mine that said something about birth control, and he said "We are going to talk' which always meant trouble from him. It would be an argument that would last for hours. Eventually screwing me up in school I could not concentrate in school. I did not want to go home. My dad changed his work schedule to make sure he would be there before I did. He tried to control me. I could not even go outside the house without him thinking I was "going somewhere". It was so bad that my dad gave my a black eye and I went to school and the teacher knew something was wrong. My dad found out I was talking to the teacher and left work early and went to my school acting paranoid I would tell them he did that to me. I lied to my teacher and told him I got in a fight at school to protect my dad. I wish I hadn't lied.

The day I left his house was the day he told my mother to stop the car so he could kick my a**. My mom stopped the car and he threatened me to get out of the car to kick my a** . I of course stayed in the car. Waited to get in the house and I ran away that day and didn't go back. I ran to my friends house and he threatened my friend that he would call the police for kidnapping me. Even though, I ran away and my friend was just helping me. My dad says things to make people feel bad. What I cannot understand about this situation is that my mom and little sister witnessed alot of these insane fights and arguments between me and my controlling father and they NEVER did anything to stop the fights. I would cry so much at night I was always stressing I dropped out of high school because I could not concentrate. We were fighting almost every night over something crazy he said and I would not agree. He had a problem with me eating a bowl of cereal at night. He was never appreciative of anything I did. He told me he wished I was dead and that he should've killed me. I got what he said on a voice recorder because my friend told me to bring it to use it in case my dad tried to get me to stay in his house. Till this day my dad never has apologized he thinks everything is ok and normal. Nothing is normal. I am picking up his crazy patterns, and I am already starting to mentally abuse people I love. Manipulation and the such. I cannot take this pattern anymore. And I am sad my dad would let this pass down to me. Alot of my friends think my dad is a sociopath the way he acts is insane. My dad actually put me in a mental hospital and told people I was crazy. Everytime I called the police on him he was very good at manipulting them and the police did not believe me. My dad is controlling, when he can't control something he goes crazy. He said he can hit me if it's not with an closed fist. Things were horrible my whole life with him. Since I was little I can remember too much. I want to let this go and move on. I want to know if someone is going through a very similar situation to mine. I would love to know. Because as I was going through this I felt alone and confused because I knew what he did was wrong. I am glad though my friend helped me through it and I got away from my dad. I am now 20 and trying hard not to repeat this insane cycle. Thanks for reading.
Gothgirl, I thank you for the kind advice. I am hoping others will realize they can change as well and stop this cycle. I am really trying to change not only for myself, but for my husband and my daughter and others that I love. Thank you again for the advice.

raysof hope
Mar 3, 2010, 10:02 PM
You kids are amazing. I can't say that I have ever even walked an inch inyour shoes, but I believe m son can. I could really use your help! I have a son (9 yrs old) that is court ordered to go to his father's. I feel he is a socialpath. Sometimes I can tell they had a great time together, other times he comes home bitter. I can't prove anything to the courts - I've tried. So what kind of things do you think would have helped you if your mother just said something or did something?

Cindee
Feb 1, 2011, 04:07 AM
This sounds very similar to my father (my mother is a sociopath too but that's another story). Every time I've called the police because he beat me, he successfully manipulated them and I was treated like the bad one. He's almost killed me before and I know I cannot call them because they will believe his lies like everyone always does. He is a doctor and has a huge house, so I guess this makes people assume he is "good" even though he's evil and disturbed. So on the occasion I get medical treatment, I am treated like a horrible person for having tons of injuries, all inflicted by him, since the doctors are his creepy friends who think he's nice. They literally go from telling me they can tell I've been abused my whole life and that whoever is doing it will one day kill me and I need to tell, saying "your parents are very nice people, I know they love you and would want you to tell" to me finally alluding to it being them, and being treated lower than dirt and now being frightened to go to the hospital for any reason.

He makes videos of me half naked after he has beaten me or otherwise attacked me then claims that I'm a "parental abuser" and he literally scratches himself then lies and tells the cops I scratched him. They don't ever care I have a concussion, can't breathe out of my nose, have broken bones, and contusions, since I'm not a doctor or a man it clearly is my fault, as far as they're concerned.

He beat me so bad on a few occasions I have nerve damage in my spine, I went to physical therapy, he and my mother both attacked me again afterwards and made my back almost as bad as it was before so I couldn't move out of state away from them as I had planned to. They have killed most of my pets, as a child they would always pull over the side of the road at night, dump me off in a vacant lot, then tell me I wasn't allowed inside their home until I "apologized" for being bad. They said it was bad of me to be out at night alone, despite the fact they were the ones who kicked me out of the car for literally no reason. If I didn't apologize, I gladly slept in the bushes away from them. Sometimes on weekends they would randomly lock me outside in just a pajama shirt from morning till night, once again, for no reason. They started illegally drugging me when I was only 15, got away with that as well. He and his evil wife love to cackle at me anytime I say I'm going to get help, telling me no one will believe me or care. When people did believe me and care, they lied and told anyone who would listen I was a "high functioning autistic" and that was why I was always injured. When that didn't work anymore, they lied and told everyone I was psychotic. When I got a little older, my mother lied and told everyone I was a prostitute because a taxi driver sexually assaulted me.

I could go on because barely any of the story, but I feel too sick just thinking about it. I hope you never have to see your evil father again. People like that don't deserve children.

miathecat123
Feb 13, 2012, 02:38 PM
My father was a sociopath and life with him was pure hell. Violence, cruelty and lies. Manipulation and control. He inflicted nothing but misery onto my family. I left home at 16 and never returned. Life was painful back then.. every day was chaos and torture. The abuse, was both physical and mental. It was hard to have a normal life. I was a very quiet insecure little girl. I was afraid to be at home. My mother was also abusive but was completely dominated by my father.. and still is. My father was finally arrested for child abuse when I was 14. He left so much evidence all over my face and body this time... someone intervened for the first time. He tried his best to make me feel guilty... like it was me that did something wrong. How could I have had him arrested. They treated him like a criminal. He went on to say how much that hurt. Well good. He deserved that and more. He was a monster. The mental abuse only got worse. I kept running away. I was a really screwed up teen.

When I turned 16, I left home and struggled to make my way. I was a troubled teen. I had completely rebelled against his domineering ways. Drinking, drugs, promiscuity. I dropped out of high school. I got mixed up with other troubled teens. I did work but was so poor. That was not what I wanted for my life. Luckily I smartened up, and realized I was hurting myself and that is what my parents wanted for me. They wanted me to suffer... they got off on it. I turned my life around. Being away from them and all their dysfunction allowed me get my life in order. I also had some wonderful friends and their love and support... not my family's. I went back to high school and graduated, went on to college and graduated with a BA. I enjoyed a successful career and at age 40 now, I still have my good friends by my side. I have a beautiful home and lots of pets. Lots of friends too. I am continuing my education working on my masters. I currently have a 4.0. My confidence is healthy and I feel about myself and my life.

I did have many issues with men all my life. I dated abusive men early in life, realized it, and changed that. Only to get mixed up with a man I married who was a lier and cheater. Got divorced and for the first time in my life I have a wonderful man and a beautiful baby daughter. I hope this becomes my happy ever story because I've known lots of heartache in my life with men. My mother is about as miserable and unhappy as anyone could ever be... catering to my father's every command. He lies and cheats on her, but she is so weak she stays. He was never home and she lived a very lonely life. My older sister is a very damaged person and had 3 children of her own. She gave up her son and he has lived with my parents and been exposed to my father's cruel mean ways. He is now damaged too. I have been in contact with them recently trying to help my mom with my dad's illness and finances... but it's so chaotic and crazy there... I feel the life sucked out of me after only a short 5 minute phone call. My father continues to cheat on her as she cares for him in his final days. He's a mess... he has incontinence and can't move. He's mean and nasty but still has full control over my Mom, sister and her family. He lost control of me when I was 14... looked him in the eye and said f_ _ _ _ y _ _ old man.

I understand why some stay connected to the sociopath... but I think we all know the best thing we can do for ourselves, is to cut the cord, stay away from them forever... no involvement whatsoever... and allow ourselves to live a free, happy, life. We don't deserve to be treated that way and we DO have the power to stop it. We will never change the sociopath or get them to see the hurt and devastation they have caused to those around them. They don't care one bit. They only care about using you, exploiting you, and humiliating you. That's it. Stay away from the sociopath. You owe them nothing. You owe yourself love and happiness elsewhere.

I also feel if you are at the point where you are reading about the sociopath... they match the description well... then don't deny it. They most likely are one. And I also believe only those that have lived with a sociopath can fully understand this pain and dysfunction and what a sociopath really is. Others will not understand and maybe shouldn't comment on it.

miathecat123
Feb 13, 2012, 02:44 PM
Oops... I lost some text in my story. I went to go on about how my father is ill now and I recently got involved to help my Mom sort of finances and issues there. But it's been a waste of my time and I'm retreating from being involved. My father is still cheating on my mother even in his final days. But she stays. My mother is about as miserable and unhappy as anyone could ever be... catering to my father's every command. He lies and cheats on her, but she is so weak she stays. He was never home and she lived a very lonely life. My older sister is a very damaged person and had 3 children of her own. She gave up her son and he has lived with my parents and been exposed to my father's cruel mean ways. He is now damaged too. I have been in contact with them recently trying to help my mom with my dad's illness and finances... but it's so chaotic and crazy there... I feel the life sucked out of me after only a short 5 minute phone call. My father continues to cheat on her as she cares for him in his final days. He's a mess... he has incontinence and can't move. He's mean and nasty but still has full control over my Mom, sister and her family. He lost control of me when I was 14... looked him in the eye and said f_ _ _ _ y _ _ old man.

I understand why some stay connected to the sociopath... but I think we all know the best thing we can do for ourselves, is to cut the cord, stay away from them forever... no involvement whatsoever... and allow ourselves to live a free, happy, life. We don't deserve to be treated that way and we DO have the power to stop it. We will never change the sociopath or get them to see the hurt and devastation they have caused to those around them. They don't care one bit. They only care about using you, exploiting you, and humiliating you. That's it. Stay away from the sociopath. You owe them nothing. You owe yourself love and happiness elsewhere.

I also feel if you are at the point where you are reading about the sociopath... they match the description well... then don't deny it. They most likely are one. And I also believe only those that have lived with a sociopath can fully understand this pain and dysfunction and what a sociopath really is. Others will not understand and maybe shouldn't comment on it.