I have a friend who is an online friend, we were very close. But we started having fights about such things as not calling enough, jealousy with other friends, not telling each other stuff. I was responsible for a lot of fighting, but I was going through a bad time, and this isn't how I really am. But she thinks so. I treated her poorly. She was willing to be friends with me on a condition I can't fulfill.She is wrong about me. I wish I had acted differently, and could change the past. I don't blame her for thinking these things.. she is going through A lot as well, including an emotionally abusive boss ( so she thought I was emotionally abusive too) and financial and health issues.I had some family problems, depression, etc. I think both our problems made us think of things differently than they really were.I really want her back, but when some of my behaviour in anger was bad, she doesn't want me back, fearing I will do the same things. She basically said goodbye to me, but I think she will come around. I am just leaving her alone now, hoping time will make her see the truth.Contact didn't work. Time gives perspective. She still loves me she said, and cares, she just can't deal with my actions. But I could change my actions. Yet, she doesn't see that. Do you think time will cure this? We were the best of friends.

She was willing to be friends with me on a condition I can't fulfill.
That should be a red flag that her friendship comes with conditions.

You say you were responsible for a lot and you gave her reasons to be upset so there really isn't anything you can do since she is not replying to you.
You say she is an online friend so why the fights about not calling enough, jealousy with other friends, not telling each other stuff it doesn't sound like you were exactly best friends. Especially to the extent of being jealous of other friends.

Also she isn't believing a lie like a rumor or something but she is going by your words and attitude to form her impression of you.

I was jealous of her offline friends, felt she was spending more time with them than me, because she dod several times, she admitted to that, she'd never call, or her phone would be busy when I called, or she wouldn't pick up ALMOST ALWAYS. I'm so ashamed I treated her badly though. That was the first condition I ever got from her. I gave her some conditions before that, like she'd better call or I'd leave, when I was mad. I didn't mean it, because I would never have left.I never seriously gave her conditions, but she seriously gave me a condition. I guess there's not much I can do. I'm responsible, even though what she believes ( as for example, I;m an emotional vampire, trying to suck her dry of pity, etc) isn't true.I simply had a lot of problems and wanted her sympathy, but I think I drained her by accident. I never set her up. We very close. She said to me that we were two halfs of the same soul, and twins, and I agreed. I miss her.I hope in time she comes to see the good parts of our friendship, and not the bad, and wants to try to make it work again- who knows..

Somebody saying you better call it is very likely she didn't know how to take you because many people that are not serious will say things in a half joking manner to see if they can get away with it and then if they see they can't they claim it was only kidding or whatever.
So you scared her away because you came off as a control freak.
The real disadvantage you have is that you were only somebody on the internet that scared her off and her real life friends she already has a tangible friendship with that she knows where she stands with them.

I know, I can't walk into a room and show her what I really am. I did come across as not what I am, and perhaps it isn't fixable, or maybe she will see the truth in time. I hope so.

Well all you really can do now is chalk it up to lesson learned and not come off as controlling and overbearing any more

Hi summer... you could just send her a card, nothing heavy,. just saying thinking of you hope your OK...

Or an ecard that says sorry

Free E-Cards, Sorry, Sorry Greetings, Sorry Paper Cards (http://reminders.barnesandnoble.com/ecard/detail.asp?CGID=414&CARDID=25792&PAGE=0&CSID=0)

I'm sorry eCards - I'm a big fat dummy - Funny-Ecards.com (http://www.funny-ecards.com/cards/sorry/big-fat-dummy.html)

Yes, I was thinking about that. I think I just need to get her trust back, but I don't know how that will work.I could just respect her wishes and not contact her as she says she doesn't wish to deal with me, as I am doing, then contact her after some time has gone by, maybe when she has a different perspective. I

Am not sure how much time would be sufficient- six months? I treated her badly, fought with her. I am now trying to look at the sitiuation more from her perspective, and less from mine, seeing what she feels.Maybe contacting her after awhile, and showing I understand her side of the sitiuation, which I didn't seem to before ( from her perspective) might help. Thanks for the advice.