thatdamgood
Aug 10, 2008, 02:02 PM
Hey, All I would really appreciate some help concerning this matter, I’m going to set the scene for you all so this may be a little drawn out, please please bear with me!
Ok well first off I have a brilliant 9 month old girl who I love more than the world but this is the problem, about 5 months ago me and my ex split up, after a year and half the relationship towards the end just wasn’t good for neither of us, yes there was love there and still is from the both of us but in the last 1 or 2 months violence become a major thing in our relationship, mostly from her but on time in self defence I did put my hands on her something I am not proud of, self defence or not you should never lay your hands on a women! Anyway The final straw came when one morning due to my stupidity I put dirty next to clean washing and she lost it, she tipped a jug full of hot water over me and she then proceeded to come at with me with a butchers knife, All the while my little girl was in the room. Luckily I managed to get out of the house but not before having my arm permantley scared from her and my jumper that I was wearing slashed to ribbons! I wish I could say this was the first time but towards that point she had began throwing ornamental stones at me, Throwing our daughters chair at me, erm and all the through the relationship she had hit and scratched me, several times I had gone to play football with my friends and they had seen my back scratched to bleeding etc.
So understandably after all that I by this time had all I could take and decided especially after the violence was now reaching violent proportions and was starting to take place in front of our ever increasing alert daughter I felt it time to get away, unfortunately she didn’t and she for a week straight begged me to come back hands and knees when I went round to see our daughter and things, every time I would say no and she would cry and howl, Anyway by the end of the that week she once again begged me and I once again said I love you but no and this time she said OK anyway I have someone else his name is Chris he will be here soon by and I was thrown out within 10 seconds of getting there.Ok I went home fine little pissed at not being able to see my daughter but that was it , an hour later I got a call saying she had accused me of sexual harassment, the officer dealing with the case said she had come across a women scorned and they were taking no further action,she urged me to get immediate court action from my daughter and to say clear of them both until the court date came around.
So I went to a solicitor got the case in motion for visitations and it went off, She as the police officer had said did say have no contact, so Like a fool I didn’t did send the odd text asking how they both were, Could I see our daughter I love and reli miss her, but every time I was told no No No off get lost etc. Anyway by the third month I had enough and I got in proper contact saying I want to see my daughter please let me she agree but for only half an hour, I went round I saw her and half an hour came went and she kicked me out.
Anyway that was 2 months ago, in that time I have are found my feelings for her, told her I still loved her and could we give it ago, she has said no sorry times have changed she loves me and wants to but too much has happened and her mum has told her if she was to get back with me she would disown her once again, Ok I agree but she has still maintained me seeing my daughter recently as much as 3 or 4 times a week. Also the problem being in the last two months me and my ex have slept together at least 10 times.
Anyway this is where my problem IS REALLY AT
Recently myself and my ex have been in contact by phone and by text and she has been letting me see my daughter, now as it stand we both have JOIN parental control meaning we both have the same say in her life on big descions, now unfortunately 3 weeks ago she took her abroad without asking my permission or even consulting me, I did try stop this but as I found out 2 days before I could not. So she went away and returned last week, She once again texts calls and I have seen my daughter 4 times actually last week, but now the lease on our old house has run out she has moved back in with her mother and family and all contact by text and phone has stopped and she is refusing me to see my daughter. Now her mum has never liked me from the get go and has always seen me as ruining her daughter’s life and taking over it!
So this is the problem... She has been living at her mums now for 5 days and she has not returned my calls, my texts and I have not seen my daughter, I have a court case set for September but I am worried for my daughter living in a 4 bed house with 6 people,I want to see my daughter so very much. Whenever I ring the house number her mum answers tells me to f*** off stop calling this number and slams the phone down, now surely if I can’t get hold of my ex on her mobile I am entitled to ring the family phone to speak to her?
I just want to know what I can do about all this, I have a court case set for sept but in the meantime I want to speak with my ex due to the concerns and I want to see my daughter. Is this her mum controlling her like she has done before? Is this my ex hurting me for the past what she is playing at and what can I do about it? I am seriously considering going over this tomorrow morning and trying to talk to her adult to adult.
I am just hurting so much right now I have missed so much of my first born’s early life, like her first tooth, first time crawling, first time sitting up, first time standing up, I now am waiting to miss her first word and her first step. I’m just hurt and in desperate need to see my daughter and put my concerns to rest. I just don’t know what to do, I am hoping someone looking in can
Advice please
Just in case you need the information
My concerns are:
Overcrowding, the fact my ex and her mum are very volatile, only Thursday when I was collecting the last of my things did her mum physical hold MY daughter down and scream in face because she didn’t want her bum changed. My daughter is living with her granddad who smokes in the house AND gets drunk every weekend to the point where he sometimes has to be carried home. He is violent when drunk having on several occasions had my ex up against a wardrobe cupboard etc by the throat.
Anything else you need to know, please just ask
Ok well first off I have a brilliant 9 month old girl who I love more than the world but this is the problem, about 5 months ago me and my ex split up, after a year and half the relationship towards the end just wasn’t good for neither of us, yes there was love there and still is from the both of us but in the last 1 or 2 months violence become a major thing in our relationship, mostly from her but on time in self defence I did put my hands on her something I am not proud of, self defence or not you should never lay your hands on a women! Anyway The final straw came when one morning due to my stupidity I put dirty next to clean washing and she lost it, she tipped a jug full of hot water over me and she then proceeded to come at with me with a butchers knife, All the while my little girl was in the room. Luckily I managed to get out of the house but not before having my arm permantley scared from her and my jumper that I was wearing slashed to ribbons! I wish I could say this was the first time but towards that point she had began throwing ornamental stones at me, Throwing our daughters chair at me, erm and all the through the relationship she had hit and scratched me, several times I had gone to play football with my friends and they had seen my back scratched to bleeding etc.
So understandably after all that I by this time had all I could take and decided especially after the violence was now reaching violent proportions and was starting to take place in front of our ever increasing alert daughter I felt it time to get away, unfortunately she didn’t and she for a week straight begged me to come back hands and knees when I went round to see our daughter and things, every time I would say no and she would cry and howl, Anyway by the end of the that week she once again begged me and I once again said I love you but no and this time she said OK anyway I have someone else his name is Chris he will be here soon by and I was thrown out within 10 seconds of getting there.Ok I went home fine little pissed at not being able to see my daughter but that was it , an hour later I got a call saying she had accused me of sexual harassment, the officer dealing with the case said she had come across a women scorned and they were taking no further action,she urged me to get immediate court action from my daughter and to say clear of them both until the court date came around.
So I went to a solicitor got the case in motion for visitations and it went off, She as the police officer had said did say have no contact, so Like a fool I didn’t did send the odd text asking how they both were, Could I see our daughter I love and reli miss her, but every time I was told no No No off get lost etc. Anyway by the third month I had enough and I got in proper contact saying I want to see my daughter please let me she agree but for only half an hour, I went round I saw her and half an hour came went and she kicked me out.
Anyway that was 2 months ago, in that time I have are found my feelings for her, told her I still loved her and could we give it ago, she has said no sorry times have changed she loves me and wants to but too much has happened and her mum has told her if she was to get back with me she would disown her once again, Ok I agree but she has still maintained me seeing my daughter recently as much as 3 or 4 times a week. Also the problem being in the last two months me and my ex have slept together at least 10 times.
Anyway this is where my problem IS REALLY AT
Recently myself and my ex have been in contact by phone and by text and she has been letting me see my daughter, now as it stand we both have JOIN parental control meaning we both have the same say in her life on big descions, now unfortunately 3 weeks ago she took her abroad without asking my permission or even consulting me, I did try stop this but as I found out 2 days before I could not. So she went away and returned last week, She once again texts calls and I have seen my daughter 4 times actually last week, but now the lease on our old house has run out she has moved back in with her mother and family and all contact by text and phone has stopped and she is refusing me to see my daughter. Now her mum has never liked me from the get go and has always seen me as ruining her daughter’s life and taking over it!
So this is the problem... She has been living at her mums now for 5 days and she has not returned my calls, my texts and I have not seen my daughter, I have a court case set for September but I am worried for my daughter living in a 4 bed house with 6 people,I want to see my daughter so very much. Whenever I ring the house number her mum answers tells me to f*** off stop calling this number and slams the phone down, now surely if I can’t get hold of my ex on her mobile I am entitled to ring the family phone to speak to her?
I just want to know what I can do about all this, I have a court case set for sept but in the meantime I want to speak with my ex due to the concerns and I want to see my daughter. Is this her mum controlling her like she has done before? Is this my ex hurting me for the past what she is playing at and what can I do about it? I am seriously considering going over this tomorrow morning and trying to talk to her adult to adult.
I am just hurting so much right now I have missed so much of my first born’s early life, like her first tooth, first time crawling, first time sitting up, first time standing up, I now am waiting to miss her first word and her first step. I’m just hurt and in desperate need to see my daughter and put my concerns to rest. I just don’t know what to do, I am hoping someone looking in can
Advice please
Just in case you need the information
My concerns are:
Overcrowding, the fact my ex and her mum are very volatile, only Thursday when I was collecting the last of my things did her mum physical hold MY daughter down and scream in face because she didn’t want her bum changed. My daughter is living with her granddad who smokes in the house AND gets drunk every weekend to the point where he sometimes has to be carried home. He is violent when drunk having on several occasions had my ex up against a wardrobe cupboard etc by the throat.
Anything else you need to know, please just ask