View Full Version : I'm done
TheHeroMustDie
Jul 15, 2008, 04:24 PM
I'm all out of suggestions I've been trying to deal with this depression for a long time. Simply put I just want to cease to exist I want it to be like I was never alive in the first place. I have nothing. I have no dreams, no aspirations, nothing. I use to but all those dreams are childish an unrealistic. I had the perfect woman, and I screwed it up. I had an okay job but I was laid off. I tried telling some family members about how I was feeling and they just got angry and told me they didn't care what I did. I spen a lot of my life helping other people and now I sit here alone talking to people on a forum about my problems. A apart of me really wants to live, I just want to know what to do next.. What do I do next?
DaBaAd
Jul 15, 2008, 04:28 PM
Have you been diagnosed as clinically depressed? If you have not consulted a doctor I would do that first.
You may only be having problems coping with emotions and have exhausted your limits. However, there is ALWAYS hope for anything you commit yourself to doing. Do not place your well being and happiness on someone else. You make this your own. Own it for yourself and you'll realize that you are in control.
N0help4u
Jul 15, 2008, 04:32 PM
YOU pick up the pieces and put them back together again.
Even if they are not the same job, the same woman, the same anything.
You recreate yourself with the knowledge and wisdom you gained from the past.
You realize you can't be the one to fix everybody else's world and deal with managing your own. You look at life as a challenge and find a reason to wake up tomorrow and every day after that.
If it is internal depression as opposed to circumstances get counseling but
Even if it is circumstantial counseling still wouldn't hurt.
Alty
Jul 15, 2008, 04:35 PM
That part of you that wants to live, embrace it. We all go through rough times, and they seem to pile up on top of each other to the point that it feels like we're being smothered.
The fact that you came here shows that you aren't ready to give up, but you can't deal with this on your own. Depression doesn't happen over night, and it can't be healed over night either.
You aren't alone, you've taken the first step by coming here, and now you have to take the next step. This sounds trite, and I'm sure you've already thought about it and possibly rejected it, but therapy is a good start. Also going to your doctor and maybe starting on some anti depressants is a good start.
Do you have any interests, hobbies, anything that makes you happy? Is there something that you're interested in but have yet to explore?
All trite suggestions, I know, but really, they do help, I've been there, at the bottom of the pit, and I clawed my way out. It's hard, takes allot of effort and allot of energy, but you're worth it. Remember that.
We're here, so talk to us, we'll do our best to help.
reesetess
Jul 16, 2008, 09:54 AM
The Hero Must Die,
Well that is depressing enough. Why do you feel bad you are talking to strangers on a board. I just joined, does that make me pathetic?
Do you have children? How did you screw up the perfect woman thing?
It's a cliché, but you know what they say, you can choose your friends, not your family.
Have you thought about groups, counseling? I hate recommending medication, but maybe you need something to help you stay stable through this so you can think straight.
Depression is an awful thing. I have lived with it all my life. The only reason I haven't killed myself and go on, is because of my kids, I know that may sound like a cop out, but they would rather have me as I am , trying to make my life better, than not have me at all, and I am sure your family feels the same way.
Do you have jesus in your life? Church, any support groups whatsover? You really should speak to someone, to see if you are just depressed over your current situation, or if you have any type of clinical depression.
Until then, this board is here for you. People do care, I've been on this 2 days, and already feel less alone, than I did before.
You call yourself a hero, well
You may want to start by changing your screen name . How about "THE HERO MUST LIVE"
Only Martyrs want to die, no matter how hard the struggle is. You just need to put your foot first and take the first step to helping yourself feel better.
God Bless you. I will pray that he watches over you. And don't do anything stupid.
KalFour
Jul 16, 2008, 10:13 AM
The hardest thing in this world is to live in it. There are so many struggles, and it can be so difficult to find strength. I've been there, many people have.
I know it's hard, but just keep pushing yourself, keep trying. It seems impossible at times, I know, but if you don't it becomes even more overwhelming. Just having small goals and short-term aspirations to work toward can keep you focused and help you find value in life.
Doctors, therapists and meds might be worth looking into. Another important thing to remember is friends and family. If you really need them, don't hold back, let them know you need help. I'm sure you have many more people who care about you than you realise. There's always something to live for.
And as useless as this sounds coming from an online stranegr, PM me anytime you feel like you need anything.
Take care,
Kal
KalFour
Jul 26, 2008, 07:29 AM
Hey THMD,
Just wondering how you are. Post back and let us know what's going on, eh?
0rphan
Jul 26, 2008, 08:26 AM
I'm all out of suggestions I've been trying to deal with this depression for a long time. Simply put I just want to cease to exist I want it to be like I was never alive in the first place. I have nothing. I have no dreams, no aspirations, nothing. I use to but all those dreams are childish an unrealistic. I had the perfect woman, and I screwed it up. I had an okay job but I was laid off. I tried telling some family members about how I was feeling and they just got angry and told me they didn't care what I did. I spen alot of my life helping other people and now I sit here alone talking to people on a forum about my problems. A apart of me really wants to live, I just want to know what to do next..What do I do next?
Lots of advice has been given to you on this post and I sincerely hope that you are taking it.
We are all and have been where you are now, yes I'm not going to denie it is difficult to shake yourself from it.
You can take pills or go to the comfort of a bottle but this will only delay you dealing with your problems.
The information that you give does not indicate how you think you messed up, but we are all guilty of that and have all served the sentence for it,but it's done so we move on each learning our lesson of why not to do it again the next time round.
Although you state that your family don't care... of course they do, they probably have their own problems and do not see yours with the severity that you do, thinking that you should just pull your socks up and stop moaning... they would not have intended any meaning behind it, it's just how maybe they were raised.
The fact that your at home, at the moment does not help ,there is too much thinking time to dwell on things ,you need to get out, if only for a walk around the block, say hello how are you to someone, maybe engage in a short conversation, just to get you out of your current environment.
Decide right now that you will make an effort to change things around, only you can do this...
Start by making a list of what you are grateful for and what you need to change.
Each day try to do something from the need to change list... give yourself a pat on the back, it may be something very small like... washing and putting yourselve tidy, that's fine you've made a start, continue, look in the mirror say out loud " TODAY IS GOING TO BE A GOOD DAY " AND BELIEVE IT.
Your probably thinking what a load of rubbish but trust me, it does work... possitive thinking
You could visit your doctor, because I can't imagine that your getting good sleep right now, which you need for your mind and body to heal itself, he will give you some temporary help with this, please take it, it will be beneficial to you in the long run.
I think you just have to accept the things that have happened, heal yourself and remember that many people care about what happens to you although it is not always voiced, the pain that you would leave behind, should you decide to do something silly would be unforgivable, especially in the knowledge that you have always took care of people imagine how they would feel...
Children are always their Mums baby, no matter what their age,and their love for their child is un-measurable... dispite any difference that might have occurred, they are not important... but you can never replace a child!
Takecare
Choux
Jul 26, 2008, 05:05 PM
HI,
It is always a terrible, terrible mistake for a young person to take his or her own life. From a young person's perspective, s/he cannot see or appreciate all the terrific things that may happen throughout the years ahead.
LIfe is filled with ups and downs, and you are in a down. I feel that you lack the ability to give yourself direction because so many areas of your life have given you grief all at once. You are in a position where you have to put your life back together. So, it may take a year, that is not that long and you will learn so much from that year. Stuff that will make you stronger and *more confident*.
People change throughout their lives as the encounter different situations and handle them and learn... you will be a different person in five years, more confident and happier than you are now if you take on the areas of your life that need attention now.
First off, you have to have at least one job. No matter what.
Good luck, you can do it. :)