View Full Version : I'm 100% straight but
cmc1985
Jun 14, 2008, 11:07 PM
Lately I find when I look at pictures of women on the internet or someone on TV that my vagina tightens up in the clitoris I guess. It's very uncomfortable. I think about this all the time and afraid it will keep happening and it does. I keep crying because I don't know what to do about this. I know that it's all in my mind. Help!
Wondergirl
Jun 14, 2008, 11:13 PM
Humans are sexual beings. Your experience doesn't mean you are a homosexual, if that's what you are wondering. Please stop obsessing over this. Stop crying, and begin to enjoy looking at all the beauty in this world.
KalFour
Jun 14, 2008, 11:19 PM
How old are you?
It doesn't necessarily mean anything. Maybe you are having some confusion over your sexuality, a lot of teenagers do. I don't think it's something to concern you. Sexual arousal can be difficult to control, it might not have anything to do with the women on screen.
And even if it does, is that such a problem? Would your family disown you for occasionally having those thoughts?
I'm sure you have nothing to worry about.
Kal
cmc1985
Jun 14, 2008, 11:23 PM
I'm 23... and a virgin lol
I just want the feeling "down there" to stop that's all.. It's annoying and it scares me.
KalFour
Jun 14, 2008, 11:28 PM
Lol... whoops. It's usually people in their mid-teens who get confused... I was being presumptuous.
Even so, I wouldn't worry about it.
Don't let it scare you, it's just a natural human response. There's nothing wrong with it.
Does it happen with men too?
cmc1985
Jun 14, 2008, 11:29 PM
I also should mention that I just quit taking Zoloft for depression/anxiety. This whole thing started happening while I was still on it. I stopped taking it and it's still happening. So it can't be this pill. I'm wondering if this is all psychological because I remember being in a college class and my psychology teacher (she was NUTTY.. didn't really teach anything) said her friend was on Zoloft and she became a lesbian on this pill.. Could that be what this is? My mind playing tricks on me because of what she said?
cmc1985
Jun 14, 2008, 11:30 PM
It happens with a certain guy BTU not when I look at his pictures. I have a fantasy about him and it happens.. But this other thing is happening all the time because I THINK about it all the time.
KalFour
Jun 14, 2008, 11:37 PM
Maybe you're just in the mood, so being set off by a lot of things.
I wouldn't worry about it.
Wondergirl
Jun 14, 2008, 11:37 PM
I also should mention that I just quit taking Zoloft for depression/anxiety. This whole thing started happening while I was still on it. I stopped taking it and it's still happening. So it can't be this pill. I'm wondering if this is all psychological because I remember being in a college class and my psychology teacher (she was NUTTY..didn't really teach anything) said her friend was on Zoloft and she became a lesbian on this pill.. Could that be what this is? My mind playing tricks on me because of what she said?
Zoloft doesn't cause homosexuality, but there can be sexual side effects (increased or decreased libido). And it takes several weeks for the medication to leave your system once you've stopped taking it. I'd give it some more time. Or, discuss these side effects with the doctor who prescribed the Zoloft.
Did you quit on your own, by the way, or with the doctor's knowledge and permission?
cmc1985
Jun 14, 2008, 11:41 PM
I quit with their permission of course. I gradually took less and less and then just stopped. I wanted to stop because every pill I've ever been on has caused my hair to be thin and frizzy. It's weird! I'm thinking I need to start taking another pill but I'm worried about my hair. I know that sounds silly and vain but oh well.
cmc1985
Jun 14, 2008, 11:42 PM
Maybe you're just in the mood, so being set off by a lot of things.
I wouldn't worry about it.
This has been going on for months now though. I just don't understand it.
KalFour
Jun 14, 2008, 11:45 PM
Well, I'm straight but I've had "crushes" on two girls in my life. I don't think it makes me a lesbian. I don't even think it makes me bi.
It might just be timing.
cmc1985
Jun 14, 2008, 11:47 PM
I don't know. I really think this is all in my head. If I think about it all the time and afraid it will happen of course it will happen. I just don't want to think about it anymore. How do I not think about it?
KalFour
Jun 14, 2008, 11:50 PM
It's like saying "don't think about elephants". The more you think about not thinking about it, the more it gets thought of.
Don't try to not think about it. Just let it be, and if it's really so unnatural, it's sure to stop happening eventually.
Choux
Jun 15, 2008, 10:46 AM
It sounds like you have been suppressing your sexual feelings, but that is difficult to do because they will find a way to express themselves up from your unconscious mind, in many cases.
You have to be brave enough to face your sexual self, sexuality is the core of your female identity. It may be that you need someone to walk this path with you, to support you. No matter how much we want to remain childlike, we have to grow up as a sexual being in order to be "normal", not neurotic or peculiar, in many cases.
I think what you have recently been experiencing is that unmistakeable tingling in your clitoris, the very first indication of sexual arousal. Sexual feelings are *the life force*
THE very most positive force for human beings. Sadly, because of cultures and religions, this force gets warped and degraded... we women in order to be as healthy as we can be must overcome the negative societal restraints. :)
Get over your shyness and discuss sex with your therapist. You don't know where you stand regarding sex at the present time. :)
Best wishes and much happiness in the future.
cmc1985
Jul 1, 2008, 01:13 AM
Okayy so it's been awhile since I posted about this. It seems to be getting worse really. At first I thought this might be a yeast infection because I had burning and soreness. So I used this cream and it seemed to help a lot. I talked to my counselor about it and felt better. But after that day that feeling came back. Not the burning feeling but the tightness. This mainly happens when I see boobs. I don't know what it is. I'm thinking maybe I'm aroused because I imagine myself looking like the person I'm looking at? I don't know. Or maybe I'm aroused at the thought of a man being aroused seeing me wearing that. It could be a number of different things. Just to get one thing straight I would NEVER want to kiss, touch or have sex with a woman ever so I can't be a lesbian.. Then what is this being aroused by boobs? I just feel so strange all of a sudden. I'll purposely look at a woman's boobs to see if that feeling happens. Sometimes it does and sometimes it doesn't. I've had episodes in the past where I would think about something over and over again and get panic attacks. I won't go into them here because that has nothing to do with this present thought. Lol But yeah.. I've had problems like this for awhile. Thinking irrationally about stupid things that no one else would get upset about. Any ideas? Sorry this was so long. :)
cmc1985
Jul 2, 2008, 09:22 PM
I guess no one knows what's wrong with me. LOL
cmc1985
Jul 7, 2008, 10:52 PM
No one? I'm sorry to be a pain.. I just want to know what this is! :(
I've been on a different message board and they talked about OCD. I think I may have the HOCD.. That is just thinking about this over and over trying to figure out why I had this feeling, etc.
sicksince02
Jul 8, 2008, 06:01 AM
I am married,for 8 yrs today to a wonderful supportive husband. I become aroused when I see pictures or movies when there is nudity or partial nudity of woman. For me I guess I just see the beauty in woman.. not that I want to have sex with a woman,butI DO see the beauty in breast and the softness of a woman. Men are harder(no pun intended) and don't have that "soft" comfort of a woman. That doesn't make me gay,I don't feel gay or worry about it. It's just a normal thing in life.
QueenBee25
Jul 8, 2008, 07:06 AM
Actually, there has been a study that women are equally aroused by sensual motives of women as men, so really, there's nothing to worry about looking at boobs and thinking "Wow, great boobs!" and also feeling aroused by it. So many straight women can, and do! Appreciate a beautiful woman's body and might feel excited by it, it doesn't mean they would ever sleep with a woman.
I might be a bad example because I'm bisexual ;) but I know so many girls that are one gazillion per cent straight, but nearly no one doesn't find a beautiful female body attractive.
Think of the 'Golden Selection'. It's just a certain set of measurement and ratio, but being used on a picture, we can't help but find this picture somewhat beautiful. Now you might think, OK, but I don't get all hot and bothered by art ;) but then again, the body, female and male, will always trigger something sexual, that's just human, just like looking at a Monet might make feel peaceful, or a Dalí might mess with your head ;)
My guess is that once you accept that you might feel aroused by a woman even though you're straight, it won't be an issue anymore. I mean, what's bad about having an eye for beauty?
You said that you're still a virgin, so I get why this might confuse you even more. But believe it or not, there's more to being gay than just finding boobs attractive! ;)
And saying this as someone who went through the whole sexual identity crisis, NO pill in the whole wide world can turn you gay, just like there's no pill which can turn you straight if you're not.
What I need to say as well is that, even if you were gay, and I really assume that you're not! - it's not the end of the world. :)
George_1950
Jul 8, 2008, 07:47 AM
Humans are sexual beings.. Please stop obsessing over this. Stop crying, and begin to enjoy looking at all the beauty in this world. Your response sounds 'Pavlovian' to me: http://au.encarta.msn.com/media_121625798_761555450_-1_1/Pavlov's_Dog.html Plus, you sound like an honest, introspective type of person; so be a friend to yourself through this period.
cmc1985
Jul 8, 2008, 02:19 PM
Thanks for the replies, guys. :) I just don't get why I feel like this NOW. I didn't used to feel like that. It's very odd. I think my mind is obsessing about this WAY too much. Y'all don't know my crazy head. LOL :p
plonak
Jul 8, 2008, 02:39 PM
Yeah your brain is obsessing WAYYYYY wayy way too much..
I know how it is though.. you are your own worst enemy, I struggle with that too.. it's like we can't shut off our brains... I deal with anxiety too and am taking meds for it now..
To be honset, I think you are just horny sometimes, and when you see anything sexual it stimulates your brain.. your brain is wired for sex and your body craves it.. therefore when you see anyhting related to it, your brain triggers something in your body telling you it likes that sexual sight.. it's normal!!
I commend you on your virginity at 23.. it must be hard.. like I said we are all sexual beings and depriving our bodies of what they want can be hard on us.. I'm not saying that being a virgin is bad.. but I just think your sexual desires are coming out more than usual
Roma15
Jul 8, 2010, 07:50 AM
Actually, I'm kind of in the same boat. I'm 22, a virgin, never been kissed or dated anyone cause I'm so shy. And it's so freaking hard - sometimes I crave to be touched so much that I wouldn't care if it was a man, woman or monkey. But it's my best friend who constantly puts doubt in my mind over my sexuality by constantly asking whether I could be gay (she's 100% straight and can't stop talking about guys). I never thought about it before, but I find both men and women beautiful, but I'm too repressed to feel anything towards either. And I enjoy looking at breasts which led me to question whether this indicates I have gay tendencies?
crystalblue28
Aug 22, 2010, 01:20 PM
Hi CMC1985
I'm pretty sure that you have HOCD. I say that because I have it too-it went away for like 8 years and then came back-different things trigger it off plus I think society portrays women mostly as the object of sexual desire so it kind of messes with your head. Also, you may be turned on because as other users have said its something sexual and reminds you of your own sexiness. I know I have other types of OCD that I know have no truth to them but this one is always the worst because sometimes I think there is a very small bit of truth to it.
Roma15
Aug 22, 2010, 05:59 PM
Thanks so much - I looked it up. I think you're right because I never even thought about this till my friend put that idea in my head. I always felt straight. I'm INTJ, so prone to obsessiveness. I wonder if men have this too, or is this a purely female syndrome cause men aren't portrayed as sexual objects? What makes it worse is that you can never disprove yourself as I believe there're no 100% straight of 100% gay people in this world - all humans are to some degree bisexual. So there's always a bit of truth, but so it is for the rest of the straight population, they just don't obsess over it. I think being young with hormones and celibate makes it worse - cause you have lots of sexual thoughts, thus more for your obsessing brain to feed on.
HAve you figured out any treatment strategies? I figured I just ignore the thoughts and if they really nag me I defeat them with a 'so what if I was gay? Not the end of the world'. All OCD is built on fear.I'm busy enoiugh with my studies and work too, so that I don't deliberately think about it, it's not too bad.
gregman2013
Oct 20, 2010, 08:42 PM
I believe that all men and women are naturally bixual, but soceity says no. so all I can tell you is you liked saw.
To detrime your sexual idenity must ask repaetily unitll come up with diffinitive awsnsers. 1 what are the benefits of sex with a women and a man. Than ask what would be displeasing.( these can not be swayed by what you see yourself doing/ never doing) then ask is the work worth the pleasure 2 next ask am I socalliy attracted to women/men, this means who do you find them trusting and do they share common intrest's with you, 3 last ask am I willing to let soceity see me with this person if yes to all three than you are fully attacted to that gender.
This will tell you what your attacted to don't worry your probably not gay, but if you are then don't repress it will make this feelign worse