I guess I just admitted to myself and husband that I am very uncomfortable after sex. I've been suffering in silence for 11 years. After sex, it burns like nobody's business when I pee. I have to sit on the toilet for several minutes to get myself together. My vagina swells and gets all out of shape. It hurts to touch it and I walk funny after sex. Sometimes I have to put ice down there. After 30 minutes or so the burning stops but the swelling lasts a day or two. Sometimes I get a sharp pain down a straight line from my belly button downward as if I have a bladder infection or something. It would devastate my husband if he has something to do with my body's reaction to him. He knows that I have pain but I try not to make him feel guilty. Could his sperm be my culprit?
Please help a forty year old!

What a man eats is reflected in how sperm tastes and smells and possibly you could be allergic to whatever he has eaten the day before. Does this happen on a constant basis, or only time to time ?

Lubrication will ease the discomfort. Make sure you use a water based, fragrance free product like KY jelly or Astro Glide. Also if you use condoms get latex free. As you know the genitals are a very sensitive area, some lubricants can react with PH in your vagina causing it to be very uncomfortable. Also your urethra ( small opening where your urine comes out) can become bruised if you are not lubed enough, or if intercourse is too "rough". Use the restroom just before and immediately after to help any bacteria from building up in the opening of the urethra and being pushed up into you bladder by the force of intercourse. You should talk with your doctor as well to rule out anything being wrong. Some vaginal infections such as a yeast infection or bacterial vaginosis can cause painful intercourse. Although not usually sexually transmitted diseases, it is common for the two problems to be passed back and forth between partners.

Its rare, but some women are actually allergic to sperm. Have you talked to your doctor about any of this?