have been thinking of how relationship work and how it is the loss of value that goes once one person decides to leave another. The loss of value has been caused by negative rewarding experiences with the person who they have lost value for.

No in a reconciliation that value has to be re-established.

Anythoughts on how peope would re establish that value?

When I read "loss of value" I can only think of NPDs,because that's how they do it : idolize you,then devalue and disregard you.
At least that's what happened to me. You could lose value because of having nothing left to give,or because there is someone else to take from.Either way - if someone devalues you like that,if someone disrespects you like that or treats you like an object - why try to pursue them?

Fact- You can only be devalued if you let it happen. Know yourself enough to,
Love yourself
Stand for yourself
Respect yourself
Be happy with yourself
Never love someone so much to fall for everything they put you through without expressing displeasure, and be ready to leave the situation if it doesn't change.
Never put them on a pedestal higher than yours
See my signature for the next one.

Does anyone else have problems in dealing with the emotions of past relationships?

Regrets, mistakes, loss of interest from them, opening up to them and feeling of betrayal. Seeing them with another, happier than they were with you etc. The relationship not meaning anything to them.

I never seem to be able to handle this very well. This goes for all my past relationships.

Does any one else have this problem or does anyone have suggestions of how to handle these situations?

I think the only problems I have ever carried over was insecurities from being cheated on. Eventually you realize that not all people are the same and some actually want to be honest truthful spouses to you. I feel that you have to have your heart broken and be put through hell to know the joys of heaven. 2 quotes "Joy wouldn't feel so good, if it wasn't for pain" and "never let the fear of striking out prevent you from playing the game"

I had a real problem with that from my last serious relationship. This guy and I had been dating for well over a year, and just one day he started treating me really crappy. He wasn't even going to tell me it was over. I sat him down and said tell me what's going on. That's when he gave me the lets just be friends thing. We had talked about marriage and kids and it was a pretty serious relationship to just go sour in a matter of a day or two. It was really weird. Not only did we stop dating, but we weren't friends either. I expected awkwardness, but he treated me like he hated me after that, it was crazy. As for how it effected me. I was not one that opened up to anyone and I felt I could with this guy so I did. I truly gave him my heart and he broke it into itty bitty teeny weeny pieces. It took me almost 2 years to get over it. Now I'm dating a really wonderful guy, but I still find myself guarding my heart a little more excessively than I ever would before because I'm scared I'll end up in another 2 year depression if I give in too much. I also find myself being a little paranoid. Maybe better to describe it is I look too much into things. I over analyze things he does because I'm looking for warning signs of him changing his mind about me. Warning signs that aren't there because him and I have a great relationship. I hate myself for doing that, but I'm getting better. Whatever you do, don't hold the faults of a past relationship against the current boyfriend/girlfriend. Learn from mistakes, but don't live in those mistakes. It's a lesson I am having to learn everyday. Its hard, but I have a very sweet man that is patient with my shortcomings.

I have always had one rule, make a decision, and go with it, and don't look back!!!

Leaving the past in the past and healing, will leave little room for old feelings, as you are constantly experiencing new ones.
Maybe you get flashbacks sometimes, old feelings that haunt you at weird times, but being proactive with your happiness, leaves little time to dwell on the past.

Keep your azz off the pity pot!!! There is nothing more pathetic, or disgusting!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !

Thanks for you advice guys. But I don't just mean the one breakup and heartbroken over the one girl.

I feel this way about all my breakups. I guess I find it hard that it did not work. Just wondered how others deal with these feelings.

But I don't just mean the one breakup and heartbroken over the one girl.

Neither did I!


I feel this way about all my breakups

So did I, and the same thing applies, you know its over, so you do what you have to to cope with that loss, and let yourself heal.

The Past Sucks And We All Have To Get Over Past Relationships. The Best Thing You Can Do Is To Give Up The Past And Start Looking At Tomorrow. If You Keep Your Head In The Past You Are Missing Today And The Things Waiting For You.