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View Full Version : Why did he lie so much to me after we got back together?


strawberrybee
Apr 24, 2008, 10:31 AM
I dated a 27 year old man for roughly 7 months. He treated me very well, always asked me out on dates and was very affectionate, complimentary and loving. We started getting somewhat serious in our last 4 months- we conversed everyday, sent sweet messages to each other, saw each other 2x a week despite his hectic work schedule. Well, in our 7th month, I got upset at him for failing to call me to hang out like he said we would. Well, the next day, he claimed he had to "move" unexpectedly for work out of state in 2 weeks, which was very unrealistic, but I believed it. He ignored all my messages that day about what would happen to us. The next day, he told me he didn't have to move at all! That same week, he told me he had to go out of state for work. He sent me a picture while he was supposedly out of state in a hotel room, but I recognized it as his closet! When I questioned him and asked him to be honest, he said I was reading too much into it, gave me the silent treatment after, and broke up with me 3 days later!
I was so devastated about the end of our relationship. But imagine my surprise when he contacted me exactly 4 weeks after he had broken up with me asking me to take him back! He claimed that he had missed me and that he had made a mistake. I wanted to believe him, but some things still weren't adding up. He emailed me saying he was in another state at the time and would be home the following Monday, but then the next day, said he would be home on Sunday. I ended up seeing him on Monday and noticed he still had the same phone- he told me he had "lost" his phone and my number, and when I asked him, he said he just went and bought the same phone again because he likes it so much.
The week after (our 2nd week of re-dating) he came by to see me between driving to different cities for work one day. I took a nap after he left and logged onto Facebook after an hour when I woke. Imagine my surprise when I noticed him logged onto Facebook while he was supposedly driving to another city 2 hours away from us. I even asked him how traffic was and he replied that it was, "ok." I was so upset at the possibility of him lying to me that I drove to his house (15 min down the street from mine) and noticed his car parked outside his house! I asked him about it and it took him 15 min to reply to me, saying he had driven another car that day. Also, when asked about how I saw him online, he said that he carried a laptop with him (I have never once seen another laptop in his presence or car during the 7 months we dated). So he was basically claiming that he was that talented that he could drive and type on a laptop at the same time while his laptop was magically picking up some unsecured wireless network while he drove! I thought he would apologize and tell me the truth, but instead, he claimed I was paranoid and that I didn't trust him and that he "knew" I would get like this. He ended up breaking this off between us once more. Unbelievable!
There are other little times that I caught him in lies as well, so these are not the first.
What do you make of this? I don't understand, he wanted me back so bad and I somewhat believed him, and it hurts. He even told me I wouldn't get hurt this second time around.

Smoked
Apr 24, 2008, 10:42 AM
This person sounds like he can't stop lying and you can do nothing better then forget him and move on.

chuff
Apr 24, 2008, 11:55 AM
Read that OP as though I wrote it. Wouldn't you tell me that I deserve better and that this individual can not be trusted.

J_9
Apr 24, 2008, 12:19 PM
Sounds like a married man to me.

talaniman
Apr 24, 2008, 12:29 PM
I don't understand, he wanted me back so bad and I somewhat believed him, and it hurts. He even told me I wouldn't get hurt this second time around.

If you know he is lying, and he keeps lying, why do you expect the truth when his mouth is moving?

Fr_Chuck
Apr 24, 2008, 12:30 PM
He lied to break up with you, and thought he had to lie to get back together. No good relationship will ever work based and including a lot of lies. It is time for him to be completely honest or you need to move on

strawberrybee
Apr 24, 2008, 01:40 PM
Sounds like a married man to me.


He is in fact, not married. He lives with 2 friends. I have been to their house and slept over many times in his room.

chuff
Apr 24, 2008, 01:50 PM
He is in fact, not married. He lives with 2 friends. I have been to their house and slept over many times in his room.

Well he's perfect then.

J_9
Apr 24, 2008, 02:02 PM
He is in fact, not married. He lives with 2 friends. I have been to their house and slept over many times in his room.

Then he's either a creep, or he's hiding something from you, and I vote for the hiding something. There is something or someone in his life he doesn't want you to know about.

talaniman
Apr 24, 2008, 04:21 PM
There are other little times that I caught him in lies as well, so these are not the first.

Either you're a glutton for punishment, misery, or heartbreak..
You really love the drama a liar brings..
He is great in bed, and worth every lie he tells..