So, this isn't quite a question, more like a request for opinions...

I have this problem with going back and forth on wanting to have a baby. One day it will be all I think about, and the next day I will want to wait 5 years or not want kids ever. I've even went as far as actually trying to get pregnant for a few months, but then chickened out and went back on the pill. My husband teases me because I'm soooo indecisive about it. My husband really wants kids now, but he says "Since your doing all the work its only fair for you to decided when its going to happen." I agree with him. We aren't going to have a baby until I'm 100% sure... but will I ever be 100% sure?

When I see a newborn baby or a pregnant lady I get all "awwwwww" and get the "baby bug" but then I see a toddler taking a tantrum in the grocery store and I think OMG I'm never having kids! When I think about how life changing it is to have a baby it makes me not want to ever have one... but then soon after I see another super cute baby and think "I can't wait til I have my own!"... its like a never ending circle!

Have any of you felt the same way before having kids, being so indecisive about it? Do you think there will be a time that I will actually be 100% sure about it or is this one of those things you aren't ready for it until it actually happens?

Please no rude comments, I'm just looking for some advice.

I agree you should wait until you are 100% sure. If you happen to get pregnant in the meantime then count it a blessing and meant to be.

If you are not 100 percent sure you should wait. Once you are pregnant there really is not a going back.

But with that said, once you have the little blessing, you will forget you ever had any doubts. ( well at least till he is on the floor at Walmart screaming at the top of his voice)

This is a very normal and natural way of thinking. Understand you may never be 100% sure. One of the first symptoms/signs of pregnancy once a woman finds out she is, is called ambivilance... No matter how much she wants one, no matter how sure she is... as soon as she finds out, she begins to question her capabilities of a mother and a wife... she questions whether now is the time to have a baby. This is normal and natural.

As the two of you have just gotten married, the best thing is to wait a while, a year or two at least. You need to get to know each other as a couple rather than the individuals you once were. Once you have that baby you will have very little "alone time" together until that child grows and is out of the house.

Learn each other, grow with each other. Discuss parenting skills before it's too late and the two of you disagree as soon as little Johnny or Susan gets into trouble and you want to discipline one way and he wants to discipline another. This takes time and maturity as a couple. Something you cannot learn in 6 months to a year.

Very few women are ever 100% ready when they find out they are pregnant. Just enjoy yourselves as a couple first... learn your quirks... plan for your future... when it happens, it happens... But too soon can be disastrous in a marriage.

Wait. You are still a newlywed. Give yourself time with just your husband and you.
You may never be 100% sure. Becoming a parent is life changing. It is natural to be awed by the enormity of it.

Having a helpless child to care for 24/7 for the rest of your life (okay 18 years) is a huge undertaking. I did not grasp the changes that come with parenthood until I gave birth.

I was ready, I was happy about it. I am the oldest in a large family, I thought I knew what I was getting into. Wrong! No amount of reading or learning will prepare you for the realities of being a Mom.

I do tend to overthink things, but it really hit me hard. I could not go into the next room without listening for the baby, Or walk to the corner without arranging for a babysitter.
Never again just decide to go do something on the spur of the moment.

We did great anyway, my young husband, me, and our tiny son.
He was born early, stayed in an incubator for two weeks, had a some feeding problems which made him very fussy. I thought we would never get more than 2 ounces into him at a time. That was hard.

He outgrew that phase and became a cute blond chubby baby. Strangers stopped us to coo at him. I was so proud.

He was very smart, picked up songs and could recite the alphabet at two. Without coaching.
He had a comic strip in his Jr. high school paper. In high school he would hike 30 miles a weekend, with just water and trail mix.

He taught me as much as I taught him.
We grew as a family. He is the eldest of four. Now he is a building contractor, a musician, an artist and a very kind man.
I have never regretted becoming a Mom. The goal is to raise a successful adult. I (we) did that four times over.

P. S. When you do decide, think of how the name you give your baby will sound at his (her )graduation.

I had very similar thoughts for a long time. Do I or don't I... constant second guessing!
Finally, I just *knew* it was time to start trying. Once in a while I get nervous since it would be such a huge life change, but that's natural. Every day though, I get more and more confident that I'm ready to become a mother.

If you still have a lot of doubt... just wait a while and see where life takes you. :)

Like others have said you will never be 100% sure but when you are leaning more on the go for it side you will most likely be as 100% as it gets.

Thanks for the advice everyone. I'm so glad to hear that I'm not the only one in this world that feels like this!

If you second guess yourself even a little bit, now is not the right time to have a baby. You have to be willing to want them even when you don't.