Log in

View Full Version : Having a baby


christinewest-stephen
Dec 28, 2005, 09:24 PM
My boy friend and I are talking adout having kids after we get married but he has had a vasectomy so we are looking in to all the options I would just like to hear if any one have been in this situation and if so what options they were given so if any one has any sugestions we could use you opions

CaptainForest
Dec 28, 2005, 09:44 PM
Vasectomies can be reversed. That’s one option.

Another option is to adopt.

christinewest-stephen
Dec 28, 2005, 11:27 PM
We have talked about both options but from what I understand reversing a vasectomy is very costly and does not have the best odds of working as for adoption we have also cosidered this but I have a son from a previous relationship and we don't think it would be in his best interest to adopt

PrettyLady
Dec 28, 2005, 11:50 PM
Christine, if the vasectomy has been longer than five years or more, I believe that testicular biopsy and sperm collection would offer better success than surgery. Sperm obtained on biopsy can be used for IVF and ICSI, sperm injection. The odds for success can be about 33% delivered pregnancy per attempt. You may want to see a fertility specialist for a fertility evaluation to help determine if you are able to conceive a child.

Chery
Dec 29, 2005, 06:28 AM
Christine, if the vasectomy has been longer than five years or more, I believe that testicular biopsy and sperm collection would offer better success than surgery. Sperm obtained on biopsy can be used for IVF and ICSI, sperm injection. The odds for success can be about 33% delivered pregnancy per attempt. You may want to see a fertility specialist for a fertility evaluation to help determine if you are able to conceive a child. I fully agree here, and wish you luck in your attempt. What I don't understand is your assumption that adoption would be contra-indicated because of your other child - a lot of children would love to have a sibling. Have you talked to him? He might surprise you and be excited about that idea. Good Luck.

christinewest-stephen
Dec 29, 2005, 11:51 AM
We will see a fetility doctor and discuss the option you have given us as far as adoption goes my son is 2 so I canot ask if he is OK with this maby when he is older that will be something to talk to him about thak you again:) :) :) :)

Chery
Dec 29, 2005, 05:12 PM
we will see a fetility doctor and descuss the option you have given us as far as adoption goes my son is 2 so i canot ask if he is ok with this maby when he is older that will be some thing to talk to him about thak you again:) :) :) :)I hope that the fertility specialist can help you get your wish. But, if this does not work, and your son is only two this will not harm him to have an adopted sibling, so please don't use him as an excuse if you and your man don't want to adopt, then say so, but don't blame it on a two-year-old. At that age, they don't care and if there is love in the family, they will not mind later on when they find out, as long as you are honest to him and yourselves. I'm sure with today's modern technology, you will get what you want and wish you all the best.
Happy New Year!

christinewest-stephen
Dec 30, 2005, 01:36 PM
Thank you and I'm pritty shure you don't mean that I'm using my son as an exscuss
Or at least I'm hoping you did not mean it the way it sound any way I think my son should have the right to say if he is willing to have a sibling that has been adopted because adopted children can have a lot of problems though I as well as my soon to be husband are willing to take care of a child with needs my son may not be :)

Skinwhite
Dec 30, 2005, 09:45 PM
I really don't think your son has the capacity now or in the forthcoming years to answer whether you should adopt. They are not capable of making such decisions of knowing what they really want at young ages. I think Chery is trying to say that if you want to adopt, this has to be a decision between you and your fiancé. Your child will accept the decision, if it's something that you truly want to do. There will always be issues with siblings whether it be by adopting or through the natural family. From my personal experience as a child and as a parent, I can say most kids want siblings, as it gets very lonely with out them.

As far as fertility issues, a specialist in this area will best advise your many options.

s_cianci
Dec 31, 2005, 09:02 AM
Your best option is probably adoption. Vasectomies can sometimes be reversed but not always. You can consider that route but there are no guarantees.

Chery
Dec 31, 2005, 10:35 AM
I really don't think your son has the capacity now or in the forthcoming years to answer whether or not you should adopt. They are not capable of making such decisions of knowing what they really want at young ages. I think Chery is trying to say that if you want to adopt, this has to be a decision between you and your fiance. Your child will accept the decision, if it's something that you truly want to do. There will always be issues with siblings whether it be by adopting or through the natural family. From my personal experience as a child and as a parent, I can say most kids want siblings, as it gets very lonely with out them.

As far as fertility issues, a specialist in this area will best advise your many options. I have two half-brothers and got them at the age of 11. It does not matter where they come from, I still love them.
Even if they would have been adopted, and I was younger, kids grow together and love each other - there is no problem there. It has to be you and your man's choice, though. Good luck, and HAPPY NEW YEAR!

christinewest-stephen
Dec 31, 2005, 11:03 AM
Maby you are right but I still think we will wait till my son is old enough to ask his opinion he does deserve to be considered in this and children should not be underestemated

Happy new year to all of you