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View Full Version : Father does not get to see his son


onehappyneedle
Dec 27, 2007, 06:09 AM
I am writing on behalf of my son. He is divorced and has a son that his x-wife will not let him see. The divorce decree gives him visitation rights several times a week. He pays his child support through his work gladly. She was ordered not to move out of state and did. She was ordered to give him her telephone number and address and didn't She moved back into the state and still he doesn't have a way of contacting his son. His son had surgery and the only way he knew about it was the charges that came through his insurance at work. If the father misses child support the courts will put him in jail but the mother can ignore the same divorce decree and nothing can be done except hire an attorney at an enormous expense and take her to court. What does that accomplish? Is there anyone out there that can give us some advice as to how to force her to adhere to this order that won't cost an arm and a leg. He now has another family and cannot afford to hire an attorney. I am involved because as a grandmother my heart is broken that I can't see my grandson.
Thanks for listening and I hope someone can help.

excon
Dec 27, 2007, 06:39 AM
Hello one:

If he was getting ready for a battle, you'd want him armed to the teeth, wouldn't you?? Ok, he's getting ready for a battle over his children, but you say he can't afford to buy any armor.

If that's the case, and he has NO weapons with which to fight the good fight, then he's going to lose, just like he's lost so far.

You want us to find some alternative for him other than getting ARMED when he's getting ready for war. I don't think there IS an alternative... Nope, there isn't.

By the way, has he ever shopped for a lawyer?? With ALLLLLLLL those lawyers in the phone book, you'd think he could find one who would take payments... As a matter of fact, I'm sure he could, if he would only look instead of assume...

excon

shygrneyzs
Dec 27, 2007, 06:42 AM
Neither you nor your son can force his ex to do anything. She is just going to laugh at both of you, then do her own way.

This has to be done legally. That means an attorney and the court system. There is no way around this issue.

bushg
Dec 27, 2007, 06:58 AM
Have you even tried calling the courthouse and speaking to someone to see what steps they would suggest for you to take.
My husband never had a problem seeing his son but he did have issues with her asking for raises every time she got angry over something. We settled those issues through the courts with no help rom a lawyer.
I'm not saying you will not need a lawyer but at least call family court and speak with someone. An order is an order maybe they can tell you how this can be enforced.
I can't understand why he could not get an address from the bills,hosptial etc. I would even try the phone company. I know for a fact they will not give out a private number but they will give out the address.

George_1950
Dec 27, 2007, 04:33 PM
Write a letter, much like you have written here. Go into the phone book and send it to ten matrimonial/family lawyers. Wait three days and call all of them. Keep in mind that lawyers are not cut out of a pattern; they are all different and choose their cases in different ways. It may be that if the mother's behavior is found to be in willful contempt of the court's order, that she will be ordered to pay the attorney fees, and your son may be reimbursed. But if you want a lawyer, you will have to pay.

Fr_Chuck
Dec 27, 2007, 06:05 PM
You have to go to court, take her back and back and back for contempt, at some point the judge will start having a fine for her actions

sunnyMI
Dec 27, 2007, 06:12 PM
File a written complaint with the Friend of the Court. If the Friend of the Court
Believes the parenting time order has been violated, they will start enforcement
Action.

The Friend of the Court must begin enforcement when it receives a written complaint
Stating specific facts. This complaint should include dates, times and reasons given
About any alleged denial of parenting time. A party has the right to request the Friend
Of the Court assist in preparing a written complaint about parenting time.

However, the Friend of the Court Office may decline to respond to the alleged violation
If (1) it occurred more than 56 days before the complaint is made or (2) the complaining
Party has made two or more complaints found by the Court to be unwarranted and has
Failed to pay costs assessed in those actions.

The Friend of the Court initiates enforcement by sending a copy of the complaint to the
Accused party within 14 days of when the office receives the complaint. The office must
Take further action if it determines that the alleged violation can be addressed by
Statutorily-established actions. By statute, the Friend of the Court may apply a makeup
Parenting time policy, start an action requiring the party to show cause why the Court
Should not find the party in contempt of its order, file a motion for modification of
Existing parenting time provisions, schedule mediation, or schedule a joint meeting with
The parties.

If the Friend of the Court believes that the parenting time order has been violated, the
Office may:

(1) Schedule a meeting with the parties and attempt to resolve the dispute; or
(2) Refer the parties to a mediator if they agree to mediation.
If both of the above options are unsuccessful, the Friend of the Court shall do one or
More of the following:
(1) Apply local makeup parenting time policy.
(2) Begin a Contempt of Court action by filing a motion for an order to show cause.

At this hearing, the parent who is requested to appear in Court is required to
Show “good cause” why they are not obeying the Court's parenting time order.
If the Court decides the parent is in violation of the Court order, the Court can
Impose penalties. Penalties may include makeup parenting time, fines and
Incarceration.

It will be a long, tough battle but don't give up. An attorney is not necessary to file a complaint. It's always easier but you should not try just because you can't afford one... they are his kids and they deserve to have him in their life. Be sure to send EVERYTHING via certified mail so you have confirmation everything is received. If no action is taken at first, continue to file when he is denied visitations on his allowed dates/times until action is take. BEST OF LUCK TO YOU!!

s_cianci
Dec 27, 2007, 06:25 PM
He needs to go back to court and ask that she be found in contempt. He can appear pro se without an attorney. He may have to be a little forceful in that if she doesn't respond then he needs to ask that a warrant be issued for her arrest. Every step of the way he's going to have to assert his rights and assert that the court take appropriate action against her for noncompliance.

J_9
Dec 27, 2007, 06:26 PM
File a written complaint with the Friend of the Court.

Not all states have Friend of the Court. Michigan is the only state that I have lived in that has Friend of the Court. So, this may not be an option for this person.

sunnyMI
Dec 27, 2007, 06:37 PM
Not all states have Friend of the Court. Michigan is the only state that I have lived in that has Friend of the Court. So, this may not be an option for this person.


Thanks for that tid-bit... they surely aren't the helpful anyway.

J_9
Dec 27, 2007, 06:52 PM
Thanks for that tid-bit...they surely aren't the helpful anyways.

I am from Michigan too, transplanted to Tennessee currently, they aren't helpful unless you are the one OWING support, then they go for your... um testicles. LOL